Read Online Finding Evan by Lisa Swallow - Free Book Online

weekend.”
    Ness yawns. “Okay.” But it’s not.
    Ness’s shirt has slipped to one side, revealing one shoulder and a black bra strap. Instantly, an image of removing both appears in my mind. I place my lips on her shoulder, before kissing towards her neck and ear. She shrugs away my head, complaining it tickles. Holding her by the shoulders, I circle my thumbs on her neck, concentrating on not imagining her topless.
    “I wish you weren’t sick,” I murmur.
    Her pale complexion is tinged with pink, and she shrugs me off. “Well, I am.”
    “I don’t need to go just yet,” I say, and hug her stiff figure to me.
    She relents and rests her head against my chest. Even though it’s two in the afternoon, Ness’s breathing shallows as she relaxes and drifts to sleep. These are some of my favorite moments – the peace that comes over me when Ness is in my arms and I know she’s mine. Ness shifts, and her arm tightens around my waist as she pushes her head further into my chest, sighing in her sleep.
    Leaving her today will be doubly hard, because I don’t know what I’m facing with Lucy this weekend.

Chapter Seven

    EVAN

    This is where I could’ve ended up if Faye had taken us with her. Lucy clutches the address in her hand and I park in the street, scouting out which house is Faye’s. Several homes have boarded up windows, tagged with graffiti, and rubbish piled in the gardens – old furniture, broken televisions – even weeds struggle to grow through. I stare at the crumbling garden walls and watch as a couple of children wander along the street. They look about ten-years-old, but have the swagger of teens. Growing up before their time.
    The noise of Lucy chewing her fingernails accompanied us down the motorway and irritated the crap out of me. Lucy changed her clothes four times before we left the house, finally settling for one of her bright bohemian mixes of skirts and shirts. A Lucy-look. Which is what I told her – she should be herself. Now, she’s gripping the sides of her bag so tightly her knuckles have lost all color.
    “Will you come in with me?” Lucy asks.
    I knock my head against the headrest. “No. Stop asking me.”
    Again, the chewing sound. “Okay.”
    “I can wait a couple of hours and then I have to leave.”
    Lucy rubs her lips together, and I swear she’s going to cry. I temper my tone. “Look, this is tough for me too. Are you sure you want to do this?”
    “Yes.” Her voice is a whisper, but her determination clear.
    I spoke to Faye, confirmed she had asked Lucy to visit her. She tried to make conversation, but I restricted my words to the minimum necessary. Businesslike, taking down her address and confirming a time. Faye’s voice shook as she quietly gave me the details, her Lancashire accent apparent.
    After the last few years of coping with Lucy and her disorder, I’m good at shutting down unpleasant emotions and pretending this isn’t my reality. But that’s easy enough in Leeds with Ness around. Sitting here, looking over at Faye’s green front door, the emotions are breaking through the gaps.
    Lucy’s breath comes in short bursts and I place an arm on hers. “Is this a good idea? We can go.”
    “No. I have to do this. See her.”
    Will she be okay? Briefly, the idea Lucy might get too upset and shout at or attack the woman enters my mind, but I know that’s not Lucy. Only I get that treatment. The biggest problem is Lucy has an idea of an arms-open family reunion, which I don’t think is likely.
    “Right.” Lucy sucks in a breath and kisses my cheek. “See you soon.”
    I watch as Lucy walks up the cracked concrete path and knocks on the door. Faye’s waiting, because the door opens instantly. Lucy obscures the doorway and I shift my gaze to my hands, refusing to allow myself a glimpse of the woman in the doorway. When I glance back, the door has closed.
    I stare ahead, heart thumping blood away from my head and dizzying me. Maybe I should go and see