Read Online Exposed: The Secret Life of Jodi Arias by Jane Velez-Mitchell - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Jane Velez-Mitchell
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By July she had seesawed back to loving Matt. “How grateful, how lucky, and how privileged I am to walk by his side in this lifetime,” she noted on July 12. But by October, Jodi had become disillusioned. “I feel utterly fucking worthless, useless and destructive,” she began her entry of October 8, 2000. “Like maybe I am failing at life, failing at my karmic lessons and failing at my relationship with my beloved.”
January 2001 saw Jodi’s relationship with Matt beginning to crumble. “So often, it seems like Matt really doesn’t give a shit. Sometimes, I feel like I’m just some stereotypical ‘woman’ who sits at home and isn’t important,” was her entry on January 3.
Later that month, Jodi consulted her mother about her feelings of disillusionment. Sandy Arias told her daughter that she liked Matt, but Jodi needed to realize that “he’s never going to change.” In her journal entry dated January 18, 2001, Jodi complained about his housekeeping. It infuriated her that he left the house such a pigsty, and expected her to pick up after him. She also expressed annoyance at his constant lack of money. She wrote of feeling put upon by his continued inability to pay his share of the bills, and that they had to cancel evenings out with friends due to Matt’s lack of financial resources. To remedy the situation, the two decided to get their own places. But Jodi feared it was not a permanent solution, “just running from the problem.” The man Jodi had envisioned as her Prince Charming had turned into a disappointment. This would happen over and over again, with man after man.
Jodi claimed their relationship ended when Matt started secretly dating a colleague of his named Bianca. Matt had gotten a job at a resort in Crater Lake, Oregon, and had been living there in employee housing. Though Jodi had suspected that Matt might be straying, she had no proof until, she claimed, a friend broke it to her. Hysterical, she drove an hour and a half north to confront the other woman. When relationship drama was at the finish line, Jodi’s urge to confront became single-minded, overpowering her common sense. Bianca confirmed the rumor, prompting Jodi to break up with Matt for good. That didn’t mean there wasn’t the final attempt to persuade him to come back to her, as she suggested in her goodbye email to him, hoping it might encourage him to stay with her. But the relationship was over. Indeed, some say Matt had already ended it with Jodi before she confronted Bianca, which would put a totally different spin on Jodi’s behavior, making her seem angry over the rejection.
N ot long after things with Matt went south, Jodi moved from Oregon to Big Sur, California, five hundred miles away, and it was there, in the fall of 2001, that she took a job as a waitress at the chic Ventana Inn & Spa in Carmel. Darryl Brewer, the resort’s food and beverage director, was in charge of hiring and training the restaurant’s employees. Darryl was handsome, thin, fit, and well groomed, and though he was her boss, Jodi harbored a secret crush for a year, calling him a “George Clooney type.” He always presented himself in a sophisticated, professional manner, his brown hair neatly combed and his blue-gray eyes appearing gentle behind rimless glasses.
Jodi didn’t want a workplace relationship, but it appeared that there were feelings on both sides, and some romantic type of relationship was slowly blooming. Finally it became unavoidable. Jodi says she began filling in as a wedding coordinator at the Ventana Inn, while Darryl resigned from management. Finally free to date, the two became a couple in 2002.
Jodi had never been in a relationship with anyone like Darryl. For one thing, Darryl was much older than Jodi—almost twenty years older. With Jodi twenty-two and Darryl forty-two, it was a real May-December romance. Besides the age difference, Darryl was also divorced with a four-year-old son. Jodi would
By July she had seesawed back to loving Matt. “How grateful, how lucky, and how privileged I am to walk by his side in this lifetime,” she noted on July 12. But by October, Jodi had become disillusioned. “I feel utterly fucking worthless, useless and destructive,” she began her entry of October 8, 2000. “Like maybe I am failing at life, failing at my karmic lessons and failing at my relationship with my beloved.”
January 2001 saw Jodi’s relationship with Matt beginning to crumble. “So often, it seems like Matt really doesn’t give a shit. Sometimes, I feel like I’m just some stereotypical ‘woman’ who sits at home and isn’t important,” was her entry on January 3.
Later that month, Jodi consulted her mother about her feelings of disillusionment. Sandy Arias told her daughter that she liked Matt, but Jodi needed to realize that “he’s never going to change.” In her journal entry dated January 18, 2001, Jodi complained about his housekeeping. It infuriated her that he left the house such a pigsty, and expected her to pick up after him. She also expressed annoyance at his constant lack of money. She wrote of feeling put upon by his continued inability to pay his share of the bills, and that they had to cancel evenings out with friends due to Matt’s lack of financial resources. To remedy the situation, the two decided to get their own places. But Jodi feared it was not a permanent solution, “just running from the problem.” The man Jodi had envisioned as her Prince Charming had turned into a disappointment. This would happen over and over again, with man after man.
Jodi claimed their relationship ended when Matt started secretly dating a colleague of his named Bianca. Matt had gotten a job at a resort in Crater Lake, Oregon, and had been living there in employee housing. Though Jodi had suspected that Matt might be straying, she had no proof until, she claimed, a friend broke it to her. Hysterical, she drove an hour and a half north to confront the other woman. When relationship drama was at the finish line, Jodi’s urge to confront became single-minded, overpowering her common sense. Bianca confirmed the rumor, prompting Jodi to break up with Matt for good. That didn’t mean there wasn’t the final attempt to persuade him to come back to her, as she suggested in her goodbye email to him, hoping it might encourage him to stay with her. But the relationship was over. Indeed, some say Matt had already ended it with Jodi before she confronted Bianca, which would put a totally different spin on Jodi’s behavior, making her seem angry over the rejection.
N ot long after things with Matt went south, Jodi moved from Oregon to Big Sur, California, five hundred miles away, and it was there, in the fall of 2001, that she took a job as a waitress at the chic Ventana Inn & Spa in Carmel. Darryl Brewer, the resort’s food and beverage director, was in charge of hiring and training the restaurant’s employees. Darryl was handsome, thin, fit, and well groomed, and though he was her boss, Jodi harbored a secret crush for a year, calling him a “George Clooney type.” He always presented himself in a sophisticated, professional manner, his brown hair neatly combed and his blue-gray eyes appearing gentle behind rimless glasses.
Jodi didn’t want a workplace relationship, but it appeared that there were feelings on both sides, and some romantic type of relationship was slowly blooming. Finally it became unavoidable. Jodi says she began filling in as a wedding coordinator at the Ventana Inn, while Darryl resigned from management. Finally free to date, the two became a couple in 2002.
Jodi had never been in a relationship with anyone like Darryl. For one thing, Darryl was much older than Jodi—almost twenty years older. With Jodi twenty-two and Darryl forty-two, it was a real May-December romance. Besides the age difference, Darryl was also divorced with a four-year-old son. Jodi would
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