Esme and the Money Grab: (A Very Dark Romantic Comedy)

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Authors: Paloma Meir
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several before with caretaking. A few of my patients had passed on.
      Death had an unsettling sweet odor. The smell of Mr. Galloway’s home was more human, a dirty sweaty human, like Hollywood Blvd. on a hot summer day.
      “What is that?” Landon jerked his head back and his nostrils flared.
      “I don’t know but—
      “Esme,” Mr. Galloway’s recliner swung around to face us. Jack jumped out of the chair, lunging for me, as if he were attempting to fly across the room.
      Suddenly the earth beneath us shook with a tremendous force. Mila screeched in her carrier. The sound of rattling filled the air, and the objects on Mr. Galloway’s shelves bounced.
      “You thought you could get away from me?” Jack was within grabbing distance of me. Landon threw himself between the two of us, holding his arm out, his body stooped as if he were trying to find his center of balance with which to hold Jack off.
      He didn’t need to, the largest of the pre-Colombian bowls flew off the high shelf, hitting Jack against the side of his head. He tumbled to the ground, unmoving.
      The sound of the art objects crashing to the floor filled the room. The largest bashing sound coming from the garage. I knew it was Mr. Galloway, but I couldn’t care. Jack looked dead, and I had seen the dead many times. I knew he was gone.
      “Jack, no, no,” I ran to his side, and held his head in my lap, “ No, no, no,” I kept saying over and over again as I rocked my oldest friend in my lap, tears streaming down my face until I couldn’t see.
      “Esme,” Landon placed his hand on my shoulder as the earth returned to its previous stillness, “I’m going outside to call an ambulance. My phone isn’t getting reception here.”
      “No, no, no…” Was all I could say.
      Jack had aged ten years since I had last seen him a few months before. He was skeletal, the stink of the room was from his unwashed body. His bright blue eyes were in a cloud of yellow instead of white. Three of his bottom teeth were missing.
      What had happened to him? Where had my Jack gone? I couldn’t see him anywhere within the lifeless body in my arms.
      “Esme…” Landon said to me through a veil of echoes, “I’ll be right back, I’m going to call 911. I’ll go check the garage too, make sure that noise wasn’t the water heater. We wouldn’t want a gas leak.”
      “No, no, no,” I continued, unable to tell him to stay out of the garage.
      “Jack, I’ll be back in a moment…" I kissed his forehead and laid him gently on the ground.
      “Landon…” I called out as I heaved my unwilling body towards the garage.
      He screamed. I was too late. He had found Mr. Galloway.
    …
     
      “Esme,” Landon came to me as I entered the garage, “You don’t want to see this. I don’t know what’s going on but—
      “It’s Mr. Galloway. I did it—
      “What do you mean you did it? The man is wrapped in some sort of particle rock—
      “It’s kitty litter. Let me explain…”
      The numbness I felt when my parents had died fell over me as I told Landon part two of the story of my life, the part I had altered, okay, straight up lied about in Hawaii. His expression was blank as I told him the story but his were piercingly cold as it went on.
      “Why do you think you killed him? He was old. Was he not strong enough to bend down and pick up the pills?”
      “He was mobile, he didn’t have those kind of problems… Didn’t you hear me? I wished him dead and then he was dead.” I looked over his shoulder to see Mr. Galloway’s partially unwrapped body. He looked as fresh as the day I had wrapped him up.
      “Are you magic, Esme? Wishing someone dead doesn’t kill them.”
      “I don’t know,” I yanked at my hair in hopes of waking myself up from this nightmare. “I’m a glorified Latina housekeeper. What do you think the police would have thought?”
      “I think they would have thought very old man

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