Jami.”
When Jami went into labor a few weeks later, Judy wanted so much to be with her, but she forced herself to stay home. Jami called her mother at about 11:30 that night, but Judy said, “I was scared to go.” She didn’t want to cause trouble in Jami’s marriage, and Steve was so volatile. However, when Jami was in hard labor and near delivery, Steve himself called Judy at 1:00 A.M. and said that Jami wanted her.
“So then I said okay,” Judy recalled. “I did go, and I was with her while she was in labor. I was with her when she gave birth.”
After hours of hard labor, Jami gave birth to a baby boy. Chris* Sherer was to be the most important thing in her life.
Jami’s life grew happier after the birth of her wonderful, healthy baby boy. She was a devoted mother and very careful with Chris. Although Steve enjoyed showing him off, Jami didn’t really trust him to stay with the baby. Steve was not a caregiver and she feared he would get distracted by something he wanted to do and forget about the baby. She didn’t complain about that, but she only rarely left Steve alone with Chris. Luckily, Judy Hagel was happy to baby-sit when Jami had to go out. Eventually, Jami’s maternity leave was up and she had to return to work at Microsoft.
Steve was out of work, a fairly common situation, and he said he would look after Chris. Vaguely worried, Jami agreed—until she came home one day and found the floor covered with broken glass. Steve had deliberately smashed all their framed wedding pictures in one of his fits of rage. Chris could have crawled in the glass and cut himself badly; at the very least, he must have been witness to his father’s tantrum.
The next day, Jami placed Chris in day care. If she had to be gone on a weekend, Jami could usually count on her mother to look after Chris. One weekend, Jami called Judy to ask her to baby-sit because Steve wanted to go someplace and Jami had a commitment. But Judy couldn’t get off work early enough to suit Steve. “Jerry will be home at four o’clock,” she said. “He’ll be glad to take Chris then.”
But Steve wouldn’t wait. He didn’t leave eighteen-month-old Chris home alone; he took the baby with him, wherever he was headed. Jami and her mother were worried sick and called each other all evening to see if Steve had left Chris with one or the other of them. Finally, just before eleven that night, Steve and Chris showed up. He had taken the toddler to the racetrack, stayed until the last race, and arrived home long after Chris was exhausted and hungry.
Judy edged along a tightrope, trying to help Jami but afraid to appear to be a meddler in her daughter’s marriage. Steve constantly made it clear that he didn’t want her involved and told Judy so often. “I was told [by Steve]: ‘Leave us alone. If you don’t stay out of our business, I’m going to take Chris and Jami and move. We’re going to move to California.’ So I knew I just couldn’t show up when I wasn’t supposed to,” Judy said.
Judy feared that if Steve moved her daughter and grandson back to California, she would never see them again. “I don’t know if Jami would have moved, but I wasn’t going to push him on that.”
In a sense, Steve now had control not only over Jami but also over her mother and the rest of her family. Occasionally, he would grudgingly allow Judy to come over and work in the yard with them, but he didn’t want her doing anything to help Jami fix up the interior of their house. Judy was a slender and pretty blond woman who looked much younger than her age. She had a job at an auto dealership, and she was never the kind of mother-in-law who hovered, but she had reason to be worried about Jami and Chris.
June Young, Jami’s longtime friend, who hadn’t seen her since the wedding, came to visit Jami when Chris was less than a year old. “I’m not sure of the date,” June recalled, “but Chris was sitting up, so he was probably about eight
When Jami went into labor a few weeks later, Judy wanted so much to be with her, but she forced herself to stay home. Jami called her mother at about 11:30 that night, but Judy said, “I was scared to go.” She didn’t want to cause trouble in Jami’s marriage, and Steve was so volatile. However, when Jami was in hard labor and near delivery, Steve himself called Judy at 1:00 A.M. and said that Jami wanted her.
“So then I said okay,” Judy recalled. “I did go, and I was with her while she was in labor. I was with her when she gave birth.”
After hours of hard labor, Jami gave birth to a baby boy. Chris* Sherer was to be the most important thing in her life.
Jami’s life grew happier after the birth of her wonderful, healthy baby boy. She was a devoted mother and very careful with Chris. Although Steve enjoyed showing him off, Jami didn’t really trust him to stay with the baby. Steve was not a caregiver and she feared he would get distracted by something he wanted to do and forget about the baby. She didn’t complain about that, but she only rarely left Steve alone with Chris. Luckily, Judy Hagel was happy to baby-sit when Jami had to go out. Eventually, Jami’s maternity leave was up and she had to return to work at Microsoft.
Steve was out of work, a fairly common situation, and he said he would look after Chris. Vaguely worried, Jami agreed—until she came home one day and found the floor covered with broken glass. Steve had deliberately smashed all their framed wedding pictures in one of his fits of rage. Chris could have crawled in the glass and cut himself badly; at the very least, he must have been witness to his father’s tantrum.
The next day, Jami placed Chris in day care. If she had to be gone on a weekend, Jami could usually count on her mother to look after Chris. One weekend, Jami called Judy to ask her to baby-sit because Steve wanted to go someplace and Jami had a commitment. But Judy couldn’t get off work early enough to suit Steve. “Jerry will be home at four o’clock,” she said. “He’ll be glad to take Chris then.”
But Steve wouldn’t wait. He didn’t leave eighteen-month-old Chris home alone; he took the baby with him, wherever he was headed. Jami and her mother were worried sick and called each other all evening to see if Steve had left Chris with one or the other of them. Finally, just before eleven that night, Steve and Chris showed up. He had taken the toddler to the racetrack, stayed until the last race, and arrived home long after Chris was exhausted and hungry.
Judy edged along a tightrope, trying to help Jami but afraid to appear to be a meddler in her daughter’s marriage. Steve constantly made it clear that he didn’t want her involved and told Judy so often. “I was told [by Steve]: ‘Leave us alone. If you don’t stay out of our business, I’m going to take Chris and Jami and move. We’re going to move to California.’ So I knew I just couldn’t show up when I wasn’t supposed to,” Judy said.
Judy feared that if Steve moved her daughter and grandson back to California, she would never see them again. “I don’t know if Jami would have moved, but I wasn’t going to push him on that.”
In a sense, Steve now had control not only over Jami but also over her mother and the rest of her family. Occasionally, he would grudgingly allow Judy to come over and work in the yard with them, but he didn’t want her doing anything to help Jami fix up the interior of their house. Judy was a slender and pretty blond woman who looked much younger than her age. She had a job at an auto dealership, and she was never the kind of mother-in-law who hovered, but she had reason to be worried about Jami and Chris.
June Young, Jami’s longtime friend, who hadn’t seen her since the wedding, came to visit Jami when Chris was less than a year old. “I’m not sure of the date,” June recalled, “but Chris was sitting up, so he was probably about eight
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