Read Online Emergence by Adrienne Gordon - Free Book Online Page B

don’t know,” she replied. “All I know is that every powerful Archsussa has given up sleep. It is written again and again that without the Centric Sphere, an Archsussa must mull over all they have learned for as many waking moments as possible to truly become and stay powerful.”
    “But what of your sanity ?” he pressed. “You need to find a balance, so sussa won’t control you. You might not be as powerful, but what is power?”
    She got up, and stood by the window. “I can feel the anger burning inside me, Asil. I feel so powerful, and while I know I could overthrow the Freilux, I also know I could take over this world.” Absently she clenched her hands tightly as tendrils of sussa appeared and swirled like twin firestorms around them. “I could make it so that everyone lives in peace -- a peace I impose. I can power whole cities, ignite hundreds of thousands of firespheres, all without straining myself.” She gazed down on the valley below, opened her hand, and pushed away the snow to reveal the metal bird they had discovered. “I am so powerful, I can scarce believe it!”
    “And what of everyone else?”
    “What of them?” sneered Melissa. “People follow who is strongest. They would follow me.”
    “Like the hlenna?”
    “Yes, like them.” She watched as Asil moved away, turning to face a dark corner.
    “I . . . I love you, but I don’t like you now. I want to please you, to bring you joy, but not like this.”
    His mood infuriated her, as she was growing tired of his independence. She had come to feel he was sitting in judgment of her, criticizing her decisions, when she made him to keep her company. She conjured tendrils of sussa to turn him around. When he tried to avert his gaze, she forced him to face her.
    “Who are you to refuse me, or question what I think? You always seem to think you know best, always question my decisions, and I am sick of it! I made you, Asil, and you will do what I say. Perhaps it is time I became a woman, and you a man.”
    She began to undress him with the sussa, but his stoic demeanor incensed her to no end.
    “Is this how you imagined it would be?” he asked.
    “Perhaps,” she snapped. “Perhaps it’s what you really want.”
    She had taken off all but his underclothes, and still he refused to squirm or beg her to stop.
    “Perhaps this is how the Freilux would want you,” he said simply.
    “Damned the Freilux -- I’m nothing like him!” she screamed. “Toby’s the one calling himself Nemesnik, waging war, killing.” Her words tumbled over each other, as she paced around the room. “I’m nothing like the Freilux. You just can’t accept your place in the world. I created you; you are mine . You are meant to do my will. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have clothes to cover your nakedness. Without me, you would have no intelligence, no foundation from which to pretend to sit in judgment of me! You don’t learn, you don’t create -- you couldn’t even defend yourself if the Freilux came here. You would cry out, beg me to fight him, to defend you. And here you can’t even feign interest in this bloated body, after all I’ve done for you.” Melissa flopped back into a chair, letting loose a torrent of tears she had held in for far too long. “I’ve never been more powerful, yet I’ve never hated myself more.” She felt a weight lift off her, as if she finally came up for air from the murky depths. “I . . . hate myself, Asil. Have I become what I despise? Would I really have forced you to love me?”
    Asil stood over her, and she couldn’t meet his noble gaze. “Power can not only give you much, but with it you can take what you don’t have. Ultimately, there are some things that can never be stolen away.”
    Melissa curled into a ball. “Don’t look at me,” she said, crying. “How can I face you?”
    “I don’t know. As you said; you are the creator. Though you have given me much of your wisdom, you still know best. How