Electronic Gags

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Authors: Kudakwashe Muzira
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of a popular hymn.
Children under fifteen sang the hymn and adults clapped hands. Sarah Owen saw
this as a good opportunity to show off. She was the only adult in the
congregation who could afford to sing and she was going to let everyone know
that. She sang with a high voice, though she knew she couldn’t sing well. She
didn’t mind the discord. She was showing all the losers in the church that she
was rich.  When the minister preached, Sarah Owen was the only one who
interjected with shouts of “hallelujah” and “amen.” She had never enjoyed
church like this.
    “It’s
time for the closing prayer,” Reverend Andrews said when he finished his
sermon. “Can anyone please say the closing prayer?”
    “Let’s
pray,” Sarah Owen shouted, glad of another opportunity to flaunt her wealth.
She went on to say the longest prayer in the history of the church.
    “I
hate Sarah Owen,” Freddie couldn’t resist telling his mother on the way home.
    “Everyone
hates her,” Melissa said. “Of all the people in church today, she was the only
one glad to wear a NAST.”
    “She
looks like she is stinking rich,” Kyle said. “When I sell my video games I will
show her that she is not the only one who can make money.”
    “Mom
and Kyle, I will see you later,” Freddie said. “I have to see someone.”
    Melissa
and Kyle waved at Freddie and he waved back. He turned right and went to Michael’s
home. He was desperate for news about Michael.
    He
opened the gate and looked round the yard, remembering how he and Michael
played here when they were boys. Freddie and Michael were so different that Freddie
sometimes wondered what drew them so close. Freddie was quiet and cautious
whilst Michael was vocal and rash. Now Freddie knew what drew them together.
Both Freddie and Michael were raised by single mothers and when they were small
boys, they helped each other fix household appliances for their mothers, mow
the lawn and do all the work that men of the neighborhood did for their wives.
Their mothers had no husbands and the two boys vowed to do everything they
could for them. When they finished the work, Freddie and Michael would sit
outside, talking about what they would do for their moms when they grew up.
    Freddie
wiped tears from his eyes, rang the doorbell and sighed, summoning the courage
to face Michael’s mother. She opened the door and her face hardened when she
saw him. She had aged a lot since he last saw her. There were bags under her
eyes, the lines on her face we deeper and she had stopped dying her hair,
revealing its grayness.
    “How
are you Miss Wright?”
    Her
lips moved but no word passed through them. He could see she was dying to say
something but was worried about airtime.
    “I
just want to ask about Michael.” He took a ten lucre note from his wallet.
“Here is some money to replace the airtime you will waste speaking with me.”
    She
didn’t move an inch.
    “Please
Miss Wright, take the money and speak with me,” he begged. “For old time’s
sake.”
    She
grabbed the money and winced when President Ward’s face smiled at her from the
banknote. “What do you want, Freddie?”
    “Is
Michael still alive?”
    “That
is none of your business.”
    “Miss
Wright, he is my best friend,” Freddie protested.
    “He
was your friend, at least that’s what he thought.”
    “Miss
Wright, I didn’t betr―”
    “Did
the CIB send you to investigate me?”
    “Please
Miss Wright, you are hurting me,” he pleaded. “Michael is like my brother. I
didn’t―”
    “Go
away, Freddie,” she thundered. “Don’t come back!”
    “Miss―”
    “I
said go away!”
    More
angry than sad, Freddie went away.
    *
* * * *
    Freddie
and his mother left for the wildlife refuge just before ten on Monday. The bus
stopped after travelling for only two hours of the six-hour journey to the District
Ten where the Brandon Ward Wildlife Refuge was located.
    “Why
did he stop here?” asked the old woman in front of

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