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Authors: Juliet Marillier
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didn’t start the journey with no resources at all. I appreciate your concern, Grim, but I’m not in need of a bodyguard or a travelling companion. In fact I prefer to be on my own. You were in that place too; you’ll surely understand.’
‘I’ll be off, then.’ He made to get to his feet.
‘Don’t be stupid! You’re not going anywhere until you’ve had a night’s rest and got your clothes dried out. In the morning you can head off on your own business and I’ll be on my way north.’ One part of my question remained unanswered. ‘Why didn’t you just come up to me and ask if I needed help? Why track me? Though I have to say, for a big man you’re quite good at it.’ I knew nothing of his life before we were locked up; neither of us had ever spoken of those times.
Grim sighed weightily. ‘Because I thought you might say what you just said. That you didn’t need me.’
‘If you’d heard it earlier, you could have saved yourself a lot of effort. And stayed dryer.’
‘I should go.’ He tried to get up again.
‘Stubborn, aren’t you?’ Something about this was really bothering me, but I couldn’t quite put a finger on it. What was I missing? ‘You’re not going off tonight in the rain. Especially not wearing my blankets. And if you weren’t too tired to think straight, you’d see how ridiculous you’re being. Settle down and get some sleep, and in the morning there’s to be no running off before I wake up, understand? I have a job for you before you leave.’
‘What job?’
‘Cutting this off.’ I gestured toward my matted locks.
I had his full attention now; he looked horrified.
‘No! Why would you want that?’
‘Why wouldn’t I? It’s disgusting. Washing it was no help at all.’
‘I could comb it out for you.’
‘Hah! If you believe that’s possible, you’ll believe anything. I want it chopped off close to the scalp. So no disappearing, all right?’
‘If you say so.’
It was only later, when we had banked up the fire and settled ourselves to rest a discreet distance apart, that he came out with it. ‘Lady?’
‘You mean Blackthorn.’
‘Sorry.’
‘What, then?’
‘It’s just . . . it’s just, I’ve got nowhere else to go. I thought . . . I did think . . .’
I opened my mouth to retort, Then you thought wrong . But the clouds parted for a moment, admitting watery moonlight, and a bird called, deep in the woods, and I realised that if I had spoken those words aloud, I would have added another year to the seven I owed Conmael, and lost one of my five chances. This was a cry for help if ever I heard one. A pox on the man, how dare he do this to me? With an effort, I spoke in calm, even tones. ‘What did you think, Grim?’
‘Thought you’d say no. But wondered if you’d surprise me. Hoped you might let me come with you, and . . . and keep guard. Keep an eye out for trouble.’ After a moment he added, ‘There’s a few things I can do. Handy things.’ And a little later, ‘But you wouldn’t be wanting someone like me around. I understand that.’
And suddenly my mind was awash with contradictions, too many of them to make sense of in the middle of the night. One thing was certain; I was going to be stuck with a travelling companion, for now at least. ‘We’ll see,’ was my inadequate response. ‘In the morning, we’ll see.’
5
~GRIM~
T urns out she doesn’t know the way. Just walking north by whatever tracks she finds and hoping she’ll end up in Dalriada. Which maybe she would, but not as quick as with me helping.
The first morning, she makes me cut her hair. Makes me toss the pieces of it in the fire. That’s hard. But, in a way, funny; her hair always was like flames. In that place, I’d look across and see it all glowing red, and I’d think of the things a fire gives you: warmth, light, a feeling like being home.
It’s good sitting by our campfire at night, out in the woods or in a cave or wherever Blackthorn, as she calls
‘I’ll be off, then.’ He made to get to his feet.
‘Don’t be stupid! You’re not going anywhere until you’ve had a night’s rest and got your clothes dried out. In the morning you can head off on your own business and I’ll be on my way north.’ One part of my question remained unanswered. ‘Why didn’t you just come up to me and ask if I needed help? Why track me? Though I have to say, for a big man you’re quite good at it.’ I knew nothing of his life before we were locked up; neither of us had ever spoken of those times.
Grim sighed weightily. ‘Because I thought you might say what you just said. That you didn’t need me.’
‘If you’d heard it earlier, you could have saved yourself a lot of effort. And stayed dryer.’
‘I should go.’ He tried to get up again.
‘Stubborn, aren’t you?’ Something about this was really bothering me, but I couldn’t quite put a finger on it. What was I missing? ‘You’re not going off tonight in the rain. Especially not wearing my blankets. And if you weren’t too tired to think straight, you’d see how ridiculous you’re being. Settle down and get some sleep, and in the morning there’s to be no running off before I wake up, understand? I have a job for you before you leave.’
‘What job?’
‘Cutting this off.’ I gestured toward my matted locks.
I had his full attention now; he looked horrified.
‘No! Why would you want that?’
‘Why wouldn’t I? It’s disgusting. Washing it was no help at all.’
‘I could comb it out for you.’
‘Hah! If you believe that’s possible, you’ll believe anything. I want it chopped off close to the scalp. So no disappearing, all right?’
‘If you say so.’
It was only later, when we had banked up the fire and settled ourselves to rest a discreet distance apart, that he came out with it. ‘Lady?’
‘You mean Blackthorn.’
‘Sorry.’
‘What, then?’
‘It’s just . . . it’s just, I’ve got nowhere else to go. I thought . . . I did think . . .’
I opened my mouth to retort, Then you thought wrong . But the clouds parted for a moment, admitting watery moonlight, and a bird called, deep in the woods, and I realised that if I had spoken those words aloud, I would have added another year to the seven I owed Conmael, and lost one of my five chances. This was a cry for help if ever I heard one. A pox on the man, how dare he do this to me? With an effort, I spoke in calm, even tones. ‘What did you think, Grim?’
‘Thought you’d say no. But wondered if you’d surprise me. Hoped you might let me come with you, and . . . and keep guard. Keep an eye out for trouble.’ After a moment he added, ‘There’s a few things I can do. Handy things.’ And a little later, ‘But you wouldn’t be wanting someone like me around. I understand that.’
And suddenly my mind was awash with contradictions, too many of them to make sense of in the middle of the night. One thing was certain; I was going to be stuck with a travelling companion, for now at least. ‘We’ll see,’ was my inadequate response. ‘In the morning, we’ll see.’
5
~GRIM~
T urns out she doesn’t know the way. Just walking north by whatever tracks she finds and hoping she’ll end up in Dalriada. Which maybe she would, but not as quick as with me helping.
The first morning, she makes me cut her hair. Makes me toss the pieces of it in the fire. That’s hard. But, in a way, funny; her hair always was like flames. In that place, I’d look across and see it all glowing red, and I’d think of the things a fire gives you: warmth, light, a feeling like being home.
It’s good sitting by our campfire at night, out in the woods or in a cave or wherever Blackthorn, as she calls
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