Read Online Down From the Clouds by Marilyn Grey - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Marilyn Grey
Tags: Romance, Contemporary
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ourselves. Our own opinions of love. But for us, I don't know, we were connected. We didn't have much in common. We argued a lot. I tried to fix her and she resented me for it, thinking I didn't love her for who she was. But I loved her for who she was. She just didn't know herself."
"How is it different with Heidi?" Matt said.
"Heidi." He smiled. "She is strong. There’s something mysterious about her, but in a healthy way. I can’t explain it. Does that make sense? She has been through a lot, but she handles it well. She's different than my wife was. She's happier. She has her down moments, but she genuinely wants to be better. To grow."
"No, I mean, how do your feelings for her differ?"
He thought for a minute, then said, "Heidi and I have a chemistry I never had with Emily. I tried to make myself believe we did. I sent her flowers, love letters, practically devoted every waking moment to her. But she never returned the love. I often wonder if it took me so long to get out of bed after she died because I had spent those years of my life at her feet. I forgot there was life outside of her." He closed his eyes and took a breath. "Anyway, Heidi felt the same way. Her and Andy had a great relationship, but it never had a chance to grow deeper. It was still new and fresh. A young romance that died too soon. That changes a person though. Makes them look at life differently. I think what Heidi and I have is something deeper. It's almost like falling in love backwards. Starting deeper and maybe one day the romance and excitement will set in. Or maybe we will be friends for life. Nothing more."
"Wow." Matt looked around the room. "And all this time time I thought Gavin and I were the only guys like this."
"Like what?" I said.
"Guys who aren't into one night stands and really want to love a woman the way they deserve. That's why it took me so long to commit to Lydia. She's beyond perfect, and she deserved the best. Until I knew I could give her what she deserved, genuinely, I couldn't do ask her to marry me.”
"Yes," I said. "There's a shortage of men who don't think with either of their heads as much as they think with this." I patted my chest. "You know what other guys would call us, right?"
Patrick laughed. "A choice five letter word that begins with a P and ends with a Y?"
Chapter Ten
I walked through the door. So eager to see Ella. A few hours away from her tortured me. I found her in the kitchen. Tired eyes. Hair clinging to her cheeks.
She saw me. An envelope fell from her hand. Landed by my foot.
"How could you?" She picked up another envelope from the counter. "I didn't open yours." She flung it at my chest. "If you would've asked I would've read it to you. Unlike you, I have nothing to hide."
Arms at my sides, dangling there like broken limbs, I tried to speak.
"Say something. Please. I'm trying to deal with all of these secrets you have. I really am. I’m an open book and the love of my life won’t let me get past chapter four.” Her volume increased. "I know I have my own issues, but please. You are a grown man, Gavin. Stop acting like a child."
I couldn't move. Couldn't speak. Not even to tell her that I hadn't read her letter. That I loved her. That I was sorry. That I wanted to open up to her, but didn’t know where to start.
She closed her eyes. Tilted her head back. "Say something, Gavin. Anything."
I didn't want to be irritated with her. I really didn't, but her words didn't help. "I don't think I'm acting like a child." I should've walked away. Or at least kept my mouth shut.
"That's all you have to say? It's not even that you took the letter. I’ll share anything with you. It's that you didn't tell me." She inhaled and looked at me. Made eye contact for the first time I walked in. "I don't like secrets. I want to know you.”
I bent down and picked the envelope up. Turned it over. Addressed to me. Probably the last letter he ever wrote.
Ella kneeled beside me. “I know this
"How is it different with Heidi?" Matt said.
"Heidi." He smiled. "She is strong. There’s something mysterious about her, but in a healthy way. I can’t explain it. Does that make sense? She has been through a lot, but she handles it well. She's different than my wife was. She's happier. She has her down moments, but she genuinely wants to be better. To grow."
"No, I mean, how do your feelings for her differ?"
He thought for a minute, then said, "Heidi and I have a chemistry I never had with Emily. I tried to make myself believe we did. I sent her flowers, love letters, practically devoted every waking moment to her. But she never returned the love. I often wonder if it took me so long to get out of bed after she died because I had spent those years of my life at her feet. I forgot there was life outside of her." He closed his eyes and took a breath. "Anyway, Heidi felt the same way. Her and Andy had a great relationship, but it never had a chance to grow deeper. It was still new and fresh. A young romance that died too soon. That changes a person though. Makes them look at life differently. I think what Heidi and I have is something deeper. It's almost like falling in love backwards. Starting deeper and maybe one day the romance and excitement will set in. Or maybe we will be friends for life. Nothing more."
"Wow." Matt looked around the room. "And all this time time I thought Gavin and I were the only guys like this."
"Like what?" I said.
"Guys who aren't into one night stands and really want to love a woman the way they deserve. That's why it took me so long to commit to Lydia. She's beyond perfect, and she deserved the best. Until I knew I could give her what she deserved, genuinely, I couldn't do ask her to marry me.”
"Yes," I said. "There's a shortage of men who don't think with either of their heads as much as they think with this." I patted my chest. "You know what other guys would call us, right?"
Patrick laughed. "A choice five letter word that begins with a P and ends with a Y?"
Chapter Ten
I walked through the door. So eager to see Ella. A few hours away from her tortured me. I found her in the kitchen. Tired eyes. Hair clinging to her cheeks.
She saw me. An envelope fell from her hand. Landed by my foot.
"How could you?" She picked up another envelope from the counter. "I didn't open yours." She flung it at my chest. "If you would've asked I would've read it to you. Unlike you, I have nothing to hide."
Arms at my sides, dangling there like broken limbs, I tried to speak.
"Say something. Please. I'm trying to deal with all of these secrets you have. I really am. I’m an open book and the love of my life won’t let me get past chapter four.” Her volume increased. "I know I have my own issues, but please. You are a grown man, Gavin. Stop acting like a child."
I couldn't move. Couldn't speak. Not even to tell her that I hadn't read her letter. That I loved her. That I was sorry. That I wanted to open up to her, but didn’t know where to start.
She closed her eyes. Tilted her head back. "Say something, Gavin. Anything."
I didn't want to be irritated with her. I really didn't, but her words didn't help. "I don't think I'm acting like a child." I should've walked away. Or at least kept my mouth shut.
"That's all you have to say? It's not even that you took the letter. I’ll share anything with you. It's that you didn't tell me." She inhaled and looked at me. Made eye contact for the first time I walked in. "I don't like secrets. I want to know you.”
I bent down and picked the envelope up. Turned it over. Addressed to me. Probably the last letter he ever wrote.
Ella kneeled beside me. “I know this
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