Read Online Doctor Proctor's Fart Powder by Jo Nesbø, mike lowery - Free Book Online

Juliette. She whispered that she loved me and that she would wait for me. Then she hung up in a hurry. It wasn’t until a few days later when the police came to get me that I understood who was behind the whole thing. They gave me a letter that said that I couldn’t stay in France anymore, since I wasn’t going to school and didn’t have a job. Then they drove me to the airport, put me on the first flight back to Norway, and said I couldn’t come backuntil I was rich, noble, or famous. And since I’m not especially good with money and don’t have any aristocratic blood in my veins, I decided to become a famous inventor. Which isn’t that easy because so many things have been invented already, but I’ve been working day and night trying to invent something that is totally and completely new. So that I can go back and find my Juliette.”
    â€œOh,” Lisa said when Doctor Proctor was done telling the story. “How romantic.”
    â€œYou know what?” Nilly asked. “Doctor Proctor’s Fartonaut Powder will make you world famous. That’s for sure.”
    â€œWell, we’ll see about that,” the doctor said.
    They heard a grasshopper rubbing its legs together. It was the first one they’d heard that year, and it made them realize that summer wasn’t far off. Then they glanced up at the moon, which hung pale and almost transparent over the pear tree.

The Big Fart Powder Sale
    NILLY STOOD UP on the drinking fountain so that all the kids could see and hear him.
    â€œDoctor Proctor’s Fart Powder will be for sale up at the top of Cannon Avenue. There’ll be a sign on the gate!” Nilly yelled, even though it was so quiet that he could have spoken in a totally normal voice.“We’ll start at six and keep going until seven! No pushing, let the little kids go first, and no farting until you’ve left. Understood?”
    â€œUnderstood!” they all yelled.
    â€œAny questions?” Nilly asked. He glanced out over the crowd and saw a hand sticking up in the air way in the back. “Yes?”
    â€œIs it dangerous?” a small voice asked.
    â€œYes,” Nilly said seriously. “Unfortunately, there is one thing that is dangerous about using this powder.”
    The faces before him got long, their mouths hanging open.
    â€œYou might laugh yourself to death,” Nilly said.
    A sigh of relief ran through the crowd. The bell rang.
    â€œSee you this evening!” Nilly yelled, hopping down from the water fountain. Several people clapped and shouted “Hurray,” and a murmur of anticipation rose from the crowd, which slowly dissipated, headingtoward the different doors back into the school.
    â€œDo you think anyone’s going to come?” Lisa asked Nilly, who was whistling the national anthem to himself in satisfaction.
    â€œYou should be asking if there’s anyone who
won’t
come,” Nilly said. “Didn’t you see the gleam in their eyes? You might as well go ahead and book that plane ticket to Sarpsborg, Lisa.”
    â€œWell, all right, then,” Lisa said, even though deep down she wasn’t so sure. But then Lisa was almost never totally sure about anything. That’s just the way she was.
    â€œAbsolutely positive,” Nilly said, raising his hands as if he were playing the trumpet. That’s just the way he was.
    AFTER SCHOOL, LISA and Nilly ran home to complete the final preparations. After dinner they ran back to the doctor’s yard, where they found Proctorasleep on the bench. They let him sleep while they attached a sign to the gate. It said:

    They took the lids off the shoeboxes and cartons in which the bags of powder were neatly stacked and set them on the picnic table. Then they each sat down in a chair behind the table and started waiting.
    â€œIt’s ten to six,” Lisa stated.
    â€œExcited?” Nilly asked, smiling.
    Lisa nodded.
    When it