go to the funeral
and try to keep a straight face. Mad calls it “natural selection.”
“Okay, okay, I’ll be quiet,” he said. “So what the hell happened?”
“I told you. Mr. Hunky Cop was standing in the doorway, and when he saw the pattern the dog collar made on my hand, he got
all hepped up and split. Bat out of hell. Back to the cop shop, I assume.”
“And it was the same pattern as on the girl’s neck?”
“I’m pretty sure. It’s kind of weird. I didn’t think I remembered that much detail; I was scared shitless. But when I saw
the marks on my hand it just sort of flashed back. I could see her lying there with these bruises around her neck.”
“What did they look like?”
“Diamond-shaped, evenly spaced but with sort of a groove at the front. And deep. Angry.”
“Angry?”
“Really vicious. Cut in really deep. Bloody.”
“Why do all the cool things happen to you?”
“Shut up, Mad. It was awful.”
“It’s a guy thing. We love this blood-and-guts shit. I’m thirty-four years old and I’ve never even gotten a peek at a really
interesting corpse.”
“Mad…”
“I know. I’m an asshole.”
“Clearly.”
“Sorry.”
“No problem.”
“You seem to be taking this pretty well, Bernier. You find the stiff, you run for your life, and none the worse for wear.”
“Yeah, right. Two cracked ribs, one sprained wrist…”
“Besides that. You don’t seem any too freaked out.”
“Are you nuts? Of course I’m freaked out. I’m plenty freaked out. It’s just… I don’t know. Nothing could be as bad as last
year.”
“I get your drift.”
“You see the man you love in a body bag six hours after he’s out of your bed, everything’s pretty much a cake walk from there.”
“No shit.”
We sat there for a while, Mad drinking his Molson and me swirling the limes around my gin and tonic. Mad loves to talk, but
he’s also one of the only people I can just sit with and not feel weird. “Oh, fuck, Mad. I still really miss him.”
“I know you do. But it’s okay.”
“How is it okay?”
“It’s okay to miss him, because he was worth missing. That means missing him is the right thing to do.”
“Wow. Mad, that was positively poetic.”
“Well, it’s true.”
“You going to start singing Carpenters songs now?”
“Hey, I’m a sensitive new age guy,
baby
. Don’t you forget it.”
“Rainy days and Mondays always get you down.”
“I’m serious, Alex. Okay, mostly serious. But you know Adam wouldn’t want you to live in the dumps for the rest of your life.
It’s almost been a year. You’ve got to deal.”
“I’m dealing. At least now I’ve got something to take my mind off it. Awfully nice of that guy to start strangling women with
dog collars and making me feel better.”
“What would scumbags like us do if everybody started being nice to each other all of a sudden?”
“We’d be out of business. Cops too.”
“Speaking of cops, what was Cody doing at your place last night anyway? That detail seems to have been overlooked, eh, foxy?”
“Do you ever listen? I told you, he was doing a security check. For Marci.”
“A likely story. He couldn’t send a uniform?”
I shrugged. “He wanted to talk to her himself.”
“So did he make the moves on you?”
“Hardly.”
“Did he get lucky?”
“You
mutant
.”
“Did he get to play sink the salami? Take Mister One Eye to the optometrist? Make you smoke the bone?”
“Mad, I swear if you don’t shut up I’m going to hurt you. I don’t know how, but I’m going to do it.”
He stood up, neatly avoiding the feet that were trying to kick him under the table. “And now to drain the snake. I shall return.”
I put my head down on the tabletop, which proved to be mercifully free of beer. I wasn’t all that tired, since Bill had given
me the day off and I’d spent most of it in bed with Shakespeare. But I could feel another headache coming on, and I was
and try to keep a straight face. Mad calls it “natural selection.”
“Okay, okay, I’ll be quiet,” he said. “So what the hell happened?”
“I told you. Mr. Hunky Cop was standing in the doorway, and when he saw the pattern the dog collar made on my hand, he got
all hepped up and split. Bat out of hell. Back to the cop shop, I assume.”
“And it was the same pattern as on the girl’s neck?”
“I’m pretty sure. It’s kind of weird. I didn’t think I remembered that much detail; I was scared shitless. But when I saw
the marks on my hand it just sort of flashed back. I could see her lying there with these bruises around her neck.”
“What did they look like?”
“Diamond-shaped, evenly spaced but with sort of a groove at the front. And deep. Angry.”
“Angry?”
“Really vicious. Cut in really deep. Bloody.”
“Why do all the cool things happen to you?”
“Shut up, Mad. It was awful.”
“It’s a guy thing. We love this blood-and-guts shit. I’m thirty-four years old and I’ve never even gotten a peek at a really
interesting corpse.”
“Mad…”
“I know. I’m an asshole.”
“Clearly.”
“Sorry.”
“No problem.”
“You seem to be taking this pretty well, Bernier. You find the stiff, you run for your life, and none the worse for wear.”
“Yeah, right. Two cracked ribs, one sprained wrist…”
“Besides that. You don’t seem any too freaked out.”
“Are you nuts? Of course I’m freaked out. I’m plenty freaked out. It’s just… I don’t know. Nothing could be as bad as last
year.”
“I get your drift.”
“You see the man you love in a body bag six hours after he’s out of your bed, everything’s pretty much a cake walk from there.”
“No shit.”
We sat there for a while, Mad drinking his Molson and me swirling the limes around my gin and tonic. Mad loves to talk, but
he’s also one of the only people I can just sit with and not feel weird. “Oh, fuck, Mad. I still really miss him.”
“I know you do. But it’s okay.”
“How is it okay?”
“It’s okay to miss him, because he was worth missing. That means missing him is the right thing to do.”
“Wow. Mad, that was positively poetic.”
“Well, it’s true.”
“You going to start singing Carpenters songs now?”
“Hey, I’m a sensitive new age guy,
baby
. Don’t you forget it.”
“Rainy days and Mondays always get you down.”
“I’m serious, Alex. Okay, mostly serious. But you know Adam wouldn’t want you to live in the dumps for the rest of your life.
It’s almost been a year. You’ve got to deal.”
“I’m dealing. At least now I’ve got something to take my mind off it. Awfully nice of that guy to start strangling women with
dog collars and making me feel better.”
“What would scumbags like us do if everybody started being nice to each other all of a sudden?”
“We’d be out of business. Cops too.”
“Speaking of cops, what was Cody doing at your place last night anyway? That detail seems to have been overlooked, eh, foxy?”
“Do you ever listen? I told you, he was doing a security check. For Marci.”
“A likely story. He couldn’t send a uniform?”
I shrugged. “He wanted to talk to her himself.”
“So did he make the moves on you?”
“Hardly.”
“Did he get lucky?”
“You
mutant
.”
“Did he get to play sink the salami? Take Mister One Eye to the optometrist? Make you smoke the bone?”
“Mad, I swear if you don’t shut up I’m going to hurt you. I don’t know how, but I’m going to do it.”
He stood up, neatly avoiding the feet that were trying to kick him under the table. “And now to drain the snake. I shall return.”
I put my head down on the tabletop, which proved to be mercifully free of beer. I wasn’t all that tired, since Bill had given
me the day off and I’d spent most of it in bed with Shakespeare. But I could feel another headache coming on, and I was
Similar Books
