Read Online Diggers by Terry Pratchett - Free Book Online Page A

letters. You could hear him doing it.
    Dorcas had to admit that the Signs were a pretty good idea, though. He felt guilty about thinking this.
    He’d thought that when Nisodemus had summoned him and asked if there was any paint in the quarry, only now the quarry was being called the New Store.
    â€œUm,” Dorcas had said, “there’s some old cans. White and red, mainly. Under one of the benches. We might be able to lever the tops off.”
    â€œThen do it. It is very important. Um. We must make Signs,” said the Stationeri.
    â€œSigns. Right,” said Dorcas. “Cheer the place up a bit, you mean?”
    â€œNo!”
    â€œSorry, sorry, I just thought—”
    â€œSigns for the gate!”
    Dorcas scratched his chin. “The gate?” he said.
    â€œHumans obey Signs,” said Nisodemus, calming down. “We know that. Did they not obey the Signs in the Store?”
    â€œMost of ’em,” agreed Dorcas. Dogs and Strollers Must Be Carried had always puzzled him. Lots of humans didn’t carry either of them.
    â€œSigns make humans do things,” said Nisodemus, “or stop doing things. So get to work, good Dorcas. Signs. Um. Signs that say No .”
    Dorcas had given this a lot of thought as teams of nomes sweated to pry the lids off the paint-streaked cans. They still had The High Way Code from the Truck, and there were plenty of signs in there. And he could remember some of the signs from the Store.
    Then there was a stroke of luck. Normally the nomes stayed at floor level, but Dorcas had taken to sending his young assistants onto the big desk in the manager’s office occasionally, where there were useful scraps of paper. Now he needed to work out what the signs should say.
    Sacco and Nooty came back with the news.
    They’d found more signs. A great big grubby notice pinned to the wall, covered with signs.
    â€œMasses of them,” Sacco said, coming back out of breath. “And you know what, sir? You know what? I read what it said on the notice, and it said, Health And Safety At Work , it said, Obey These Signs , it said, and it said, They Are There For Your Protection .”
    â€œThat’s what it said?” said Dorcas.
    â€œFor Your Protection,” Sacco repeated.
    â€œCan you get it down?”
    â€œThere’s a coat hook next to it,” said Nooty enthusiastically. “I bet we could sling a hook up and then pull it over toward the window, and then—”
    â€œYes, yes, you’re good at that sort of thing,” said Dorcas. Nooty could climb like a squirrel. “I expect Nisodemus will be very pleased,” he added.
    Nisodemus was, especially with the bit that said For Your Protection . It showed, he said, that, um, Arnold Bros (est. 1905) was on their side.
    Every bit of board and rusty sheet of metal had to be pressed into service. The nomes went at it cheerfully enough, though, happy to be doing something.
    Next morning the sun rose to see a variety of signs hanging, not always squarely, on the battered quarry gate.
    They had been very thorough. The signs said: No Etnry. Exit This Way. Dagner—Hard Hat Area. Blastign In Progres. All Trucks Report To Wieghbridge. Slipery When Wet. This Till Closed. Lift Out Fo Order. Beware Of Flaling Rocks. Road Floooded .
    And one that Dorcas had found in a book and was rather proud of: Unexploded Bom .
    Just to be on the safe side, though, and without telling Nisodemus, he found some more chain and, in one of the greasy old toolboxes in Big John’s shed, a padlock nearly as big as he was. It took four nomes to carry it.
    The chain was massive. Some of the nomes found Dorcas painstakingly levering it along across the quarry floor, one link at a time. He didn’t seem to want to tell them where he had found it.
    The truck turned up around noon. The nomes waiting in the hedge by the side of the lane saw the driver get out, look at the signs, and . . .
    No,