David's Inferno

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Authors: David Blistein
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turned.
    March 28, 2006: Las Vegas, Nevada to Zion National Park, Utah. 175 Miles
. I love picking up hitchhikers. I know people think it’s dangerous. But, most of the ones I pick up are in far more desperate physical and psychological straits than I am. We exchange the usual pleasantries: Where you going? Salt Lake City. I’m going over toward Zion. Just drop me at Route 9. Can I smoke? Sure. You want one? No, quit a while ago. But you go ahead.
    He then lights up and dives in without further preamble:
    Hitchhiker: This guy picked me up … I’d gone in to get a cup of coffee. And he says what’s your game? And I said, I don’t gamble. And he said, “Well you’re going to gamble today.” And he stuck a .45 in my ribs and pushed me out the passenger side door and they shot him to death …
    Me: [shocked] Who shot who to death?
    H: The security guards shot him to death. We parked out in the open parking lot. And he’s got his gun
.
    D: So they saw his gun and shot him?
    H: I rolled out of the car and yelled, hey this guy’s got a gun and they shot him. Just unloaded on him
.
    D: Unbelievable
.
    H: I mean nothing personal but I’ve already been shot, I don’t need to get shot again
.
    D: [laughing, thinking he’s kidding] When were you shot?
    H: He shot me an hour earlier right below the kneecap
.
    D: You mean you knew this guy?
    H: Well, we’d been riding together since Salt Lake
.
    D: And why did he shoot you the first time?
    H: We’d just got gas. I started to get out and wish to hell I would have. I wouldn’t a got shot … He’s twice the size of me, stronger than hell. But he’s all hot, eating pills and smoking dope
.
    D: Oh I see [laughing nervously …]
    H: And we didn’t need no gas until he got to Caesars and he was almost empty. In the parking lot. Got to the door and I’m thinking yeah, I know these security guys. They just gunned him down. Son of a bitch. I got my leg taped up and glued. Cops said well we’ll bag him and tag him. You know that dumb son of a bitch had $1200 in his wallet. He was just going down for the night. He had a room at the Tropicana, and he was going to stop at Caesars, the Pyramid, and the Tropicana and then he was going to leave early in the morning. He had a wake up call all ready at 5 or 6 in the morning
.
    D: Ended up dead
.
    H: Right. And this cop dug the .45 out of the corner of the car door … low velocity … the ballistic man’s been here, and he’s got all kinds of shell tricks. He’s got chambers he puts in that barrel. I knew the guy had one gun. I didn’t know he coulda had ten in a second. He had gun parts everywhere
.
    D: Jeez … so what were you doing in Las Vegas?
    H: I spent the rest of the night there
.
    D: Yeah, but now???
    H: Oh this time? I’m on my way home to Council Bluffs, Iowa
.
    D: What’s in Council Bluffs?
    H: I live there
.
    D: You have a place to live there?
    H: I’ve lived under a bridge for almost 40 years
.
    D: Almost 40 years? Why’d you come all the way out here?
    H: I had no winter clothes. Really. But now I’ll just suffer through the winter
.
    D: 40 years? How old are you?
    H: 80
.
    D: No … really? C’mon. Your life? You’re not 80
.
    H: [changing subject] You can follow that dirt road all the way back to the town up there. I was crossing up there one time and an old black guy says, don’t touch my pot! He’s got a rifle and another guy’s got a shotgun. Two kids got … You here to pick our pot? No I’m here to … shit
.
    D: Sounds like you run into some guns in your line of life
.
    H: You run into lots of idiots who carry guns. What are you doing out here from Vermont?
    March 29, 2006: Zion National Park
. It takes an impressively contrarian emotional life to feel claustrophobic about the idea of going to the Grand

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