probably looked like a perfectly normal family gathering, except I couldn’t shake off the feeling that had been stalking me since Sophia’s arrival – that I had to be on guard, be alert, keep an eye trained on her all the time. Not physically – she was too old for me to worry about her running off and getting into scrapes – but just this vague nervousness, like she was this unknown quantity you had to keep checking on. It was her smile, I think. The fact that it never reached her eyes. As if it was stuck on, and could be whipped off in an instant.
But I had a mission on and I intended to complete it. ‘How about these?’ I suggested, once we were in a shop selling nightwear, and I was holding up the umpteenth pair of pyjamas.
Sophia shrugged indifferently. ‘Whatever.’
I bit my lip. She wasn’t being so different, I reminded myself, from plenty of other girls of her age. In the end I selected a few sets of PJs myself, together with a fleecy dressing gown that came with matching slippers.
‘Cheer up,’ said Riley, helpfully, as we exited the shop. ‘I had that dressing gown and slippers from Mum at Christmas, and they’re really cosy –’
‘Oh, she likes dressing girls up as old ladies, then, does she?’
I don’t think Sophia intended it for my ears, but I certainly heard it. Riley rounded on her. ‘Sophia! You could at least try to be grateful!’
‘And since you didn’t want to help me choose them, what do you expect?’ I added levelly. ‘And as Riley just said, a little gratitude really wouldn’t go amiss.’
I was busy thinking how this was what she most needed, her rude behaviour reined in a bit, just like I’d always made a point of doing with my own kids, when I realised she was about to burst into tears. It was incredible. One minute so cheeky, the next looking so wretched. Was this why everyone pussyfooted around her? Because you simply couldn’t discipline her for fear of her cracking up? I sighed inwardly. That wasn’t useful at all. If so, how could anyone help her?
I stopped scowling and instead scooped her into my arms.
‘I’m so sorry, Casey,’ she sobbed. ‘I didn’t mean to be rude. Thanks for my pyjamas.’
‘It’s okay, love,’ I soothed.
‘I’m just missing Jean so much. It’s hard …’
‘I know,’ I said. ‘I know. Now then, you probably need to stock up on toiletries, don’t you? Shall we do some proper girlie shopping now, eh?’
I glanced at Riley as I said this, noting her sceptical expression. But I made a sign to let her know that I didn’t want her to say anything, even though I knew exactly what she meant. Early days, I thought. Only early days yet.
And the next hour passed agreeably enough. Though we were soon to see yet another sea change.
‘How about we have lunch in that new organic café?’ I suggested. I’d clocked it before Christmas and they’d seemed particularly baby-friendly.
‘I’d promised to go and meet David,’ Riley began. David ran his own business – he was a professional plasterer – and at the moment was working close by. ‘But I guess I could tell him to come and meet us here instead, couldn’t I?’
Sophia’s ears pricked up. ‘David?’ she said. ‘Isn’t that your boyfriend? What’s he like?’
Very much to Sophia’s liking, seemed to be the answer, because lunch soon became excruciating. If she’d seemed a bit over-enthused with her endocrinologist, now Sophia was utterly rapt. She hung on David’s every word, kept flicking her mane of curls all over and giggled excitedly at pretty much everything he said. If it hadn’t been so uncomfortable, it would have actually been comical, for she sat, chin on fist, gazing at him adoringly.
Riley, however, wasn’t too amused. ‘Elbows,’ she chided. ‘This is a restaurant, Sophia.’ Which not only earned her a withering look, but also a giggle at David and a roll of her eyes. ‘Ooh, er! Is she always so fussy?’ Sophia purred.
Now
But I had a mission on and I intended to complete it. ‘How about these?’ I suggested, once we were in a shop selling nightwear, and I was holding up the umpteenth pair of pyjamas.
Sophia shrugged indifferently. ‘Whatever.’
I bit my lip. She wasn’t being so different, I reminded myself, from plenty of other girls of her age. In the end I selected a few sets of PJs myself, together with a fleecy dressing gown that came with matching slippers.
‘Cheer up,’ said Riley, helpfully, as we exited the shop. ‘I had that dressing gown and slippers from Mum at Christmas, and they’re really cosy –’
‘Oh, she likes dressing girls up as old ladies, then, does she?’
I don’t think Sophia intended it for my ears, but I certainly heard it. Riley rounded on her. ‘Sophia! You could at least try to be grateful!’
‘And since you didn’t want to help me choose them, what do you expect?’ I added levelly. ‘And as Riley just said, a little gratitude really wouldn’t go amiss.’
I was busy thinking how this was what she most needed, her rude behaviour reined in a bit, just like I’d always made a point of doing with my own kids, when I realised she was about to burst into tears. It was incredible. One minute so cheeky, the next looking so wretched. Was this why everyone pussyfooted around her? Because you simply couldn’t discipline her for fear of her cracking up? I sighed inwardly. That wasn’t useful at all. If so, how could anyone help her?
I stopped scowling and instead scooped her into my arms.
‘I’m so sorry, Casey,’ she sobbed. ‘I didn’t mean to be rude. Thanks for my pyjamas.’
‘It’s okay, love,’ I soothed.
‘I’m just missing Jean so much. It’s hard …’
‘I know,’ I said. ‘I know. Now then, you probably need to stock up on toiletries, don’t you? Shall we do some proper girlie shopping now, eh?’
I glanced at Riley as I said this, noting her sceptical expression. But I made a sign to let her know that I didn’t want her to say anything, even though I knew exactly what she meant. Early days, I thought. Only early days yet.
And the next hour passed agreeably enough. Though we were soon to see yet another sea change.
‘How about we have lunch in that new organic café?’ I suggested. I’d clocked it before Christmas and they’d seemed particularly baby-friendly.
‘I’d promised to go and meet David,’ Riley began. David ran his own business – he was a professional plasterer – and at the moment was working close by. ‘But I guess I could tell him to come and meet us here instead, couldn’t I?’
Sophia’s ears pricked up. ‘David?’ she said. ‘Isn’t that your boyfriend? What’s he like?’
Very much to Sophia’s liking, seemed to be the answer, because lunch soon became excruciating. If she’d seemed a bit over-enthused with her endocrinologist, now Sophia was utterly rapt. She hung on David’s every word, kept flicking her mane of curls all over and giggled excitedly at pretty much everything he said. If it hadn’t been so uncomfortable, it would have actually been comical, for she sat, chin on fist, gazing at him adoringly.
Riley, however, wasn’t too amused. ‘Elbows,’ she chided. ‘This is a restaurant, Sophia.’ Which not only earned her a withering look, but also a giggle at David and a roll of her eyes. ‘Ooh, er! Is she always so fussy?’ Sophia purred.
Now
Similar Books
