Read Online Crazygirl Falls in Love by Alexandra Wnuk - Free Book Online

for
Cupcake-Baking-Man-Friend). Before him, Maya hadn't been in a
relationship for ten years. Anyway, we’re not talking about Maya.
For the many years I’ve known her, Chloe has only dated alcoholics.
It sorta fits, seeing as she’s a big drinker herself. Oh boy, the
clobbered messes she has been out with… It’d boggle your mind, it
really would.
    Chloe’s not an idiot, she recognises she’s
got a problem. Since she and Crazy Poo split she’s vowed never to
date another addict again. Thing is, since Crazy she hasn’t
even kissed anyone
else. Seems she really is only attracted to men who are dishonest,
insensitive, unreliable and psychologically abusive. Why? I dunno.
Maybe the nice ones bore her. Maybe it’s because these guys are
dependent people, and they develop dependencies on everything in
their lives, including her.
    She and Crazy dated for a year, and my stars, it was the
perfect case study of a pendulum swinging, see-saw, rockedy rock
rock relationship. When things were going well these two were the
sweetest, cutest, most loved up couple you ever saw. They ate off
each other’s forks, kissed nonstop, smiled at each other the whole
night. Chloe would call him Cuddles and he would call her Crumpet.
Most people would call that cringey, but personally I thought it
was sweet and beautiful and I loved seeing my friend so
happy.
    But when times were bad things got very ugly very quickly
between Cuddles and the Crumpet. They never exactly fell off the
Cliff of Relationship Insanity like so many of us seem to
(including me with the Terrible Thing I Did to He Who Shall Not Be
Named), but they came right up close to is shardy edges. When he
was drinking, Crazy would get jealous, possessive and
insecure.
    On one of their bad days Chloe stormed out of their apartment,
saying she was going to meet me for dinner. He followed her and
waited outside the restaurant, pacing. He later admitted he was
certain she was cheating. He must’ve been relieved when he saw the
tall, klutzy girl walking out of the restaurant arm in arm with his
girlfriend instead of a dude to swing a punch at. Unfortunately, it
wasn’t a one-off bout of jealousy. Whenever they weren’t physically
together he would become irrational and convince himself that she
was with other men. He’d accuse her of cheating even if she’d only
popped out to by some yogurt and the paper.
    Personally, I think the root cause of all their problems was
that pesky Dating Scale. Chloe is an 8 while Crazy Poo was a 6,
maybe a 6.5 if you were being generous. He was punching above his
weight and he couldn’t deal with the insecurity that caused.
Besides the possessiveness and jealousy, there were massive brawls.
One time, as Chloe walked away from him in the street mid-argument
he ran up behind her and grabbed her long ponytail, yanking it back
towards him so that her head and body jerked back. She told me that
she had struggled, and he had ended up ripping out great chunks of
her beautiful hair.
    That was the day his nickname changed from Cupcake to Crazy
Poo. Chloe didn’t tell anyone but me about what was going on, so
it’s not entirely Emma’s fault that she took Crazy’s side one night
when we were out.
    That evening, we were at Emma’s local having dinner. It had
been me, He Who Shall Not be Named, Chloe, Crazy, Emma and
Mags.
    I’ll be fair here, Crazy had been sober for a few weeks before
that night, so you can’t say he wasn’t trying to be a better man.
And let me tell you, it was tough on him. Watching someone bite
their nails down to the enamel thanks to unmanageable withdrawal is
just plain frightening.
    That night I saw Chloe’s face drop as He Who Shall Not Be
Named insisted Crazy join him in a pint. A few hours later, the
sweet man who had been Chloe’s boyfriend was replaced by an
inpatient, intolerant, incoherent, loud mouthed buffoon.
    “What the hell is wrong with you?” Chloe had whispered angrily
at Crazy, after Mags and He Who Shall Not