him between the eyes. “You ready to go back out there?”
Was he? Alone with Clint, he felt whole –or at least like he could be eventually –safe, unjudged. No one out there in the club was judging him, but Axel did it to himself in the face of Angel. He forced back the request that Clint take him back to the apartment and they spend the rest of the day making love. Everything felt so simple and easy when they were behind closed doors, just the two of them.
“You don’t have anything to fear,” Clint murmured and stroked his cheek. “Angel is reaching out to you. Don’t be afraid to reach back.”
“I’ll try,” Axel whispered.
Clint kissed his lips. “That’s all anyone can do.” Discarding the damp towel, Clint nodded toward the door. “Ready?”
Releasing a slow breath, Axel smiled uncertainly. “Yeah.” He followed Clint to the door and watched as the cowboy unlocked it, his gaze drifting over the man’s body. “You’re my knight in shining armor,” he said softly, voice trembling. “You know that, right?”
Clint went still, his hand gripping the handle. “My armor was tarnished a long time ago,” he mumbled, eyes on the floor. He turned a fraction and cast Axel a sidelong glance. “Don’t put me on a pedestal, Axel.” Quiet fear shadowed his eyes as he opened the door and held it for Axel. “I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“That isn’t possible,” Axel assured him quietly with a light brush of his fingertips across Clint’s arm as he exited the restroom. The cowboy’s stare was heavy on his back a moment before Clint followed him out and let the door close. Just before he reached the main club entrance, Clint gripped his arm gently and brought him up short, kissing him soft on the lips. Axel’s heart shuddered as Clint held his eyes and a faint smile pulled at the corner of his mouth and his thumb caressed feather-light down Axel’s cheek.
The man spoke volumes with his faint smile and fleeting touch, and his “words” settled warmly deep in the center of Axel’s heart. I guess it just hit a little too close to reality…one I never thought I would ever have to deal with. Clint’s confession from earlier that morning drifted back in and the warmth in Axel’s heart spread out through his body.
What would it feel like to hear Clint say… I love you?
Axel pushed the thought away. Even if he came to feel it…a man like Clint might never be able to say it out loud. Could he himself even speak it aloud when or if the time came?
Concealing his thoughts, Axel walked with Clint out into the club. A different boy was dancing on stage, alone, and working up the small crowd. Axel spotted Angel on the far side of the club, Gavin was with him, holding the pup. A tiny twinge of jealousy flared then fizzled out just as quickly, leaving Axel puzzled by the sudden, brief spark. A quick glance at Clint, and he knew; Clint had given him Jonah. The pup had been like the final seal that bonded them. Axel couldn’t stop a part of him from wanting to keep Jonah all to himself. But the notion failed to take root when, even from across the club, he saw the joy on Gavin’s face. The kid had defended Jonah –to his own hurt. The pup might not be alive today if Gavin hadn’t stalled the abuser long enough for Clint to show up.
For that, he felt only gratitude towards the boy.
Clint touched his arm and Axel glanced up. “Go on,” Clint said quietly, nodding toward Angel. That faint smile played on his lips, doing funny things to Axel’s heart.
Releasing a shaky breath, Axel returned a smile of his own. He started to lean up and plant a kiss on Clint’s lips, then faltered and aborted when he spied the three men at the bar, watching them with intrigue. Suddenly self-conscious and uncertain about how comfortable Clint was with open, public affection, Axel left his side and weaved through the sparse customers, walking in Angel’s direction.
♦
The elusive kiss left
Was he? Alone with Clint, he felt whole –or at least like he could be eventually –safe, unjudged. No one out there in the club was judging him, but Axel did it to himself in the face of Angel. He forced back the request that Clint take him back to the apartment and they spend the rest of the day making love. Everything felt so simple and easy when they were behind closed doors, just the two of them.
“You don’t have anything to fear,” Clint murmured and stroked his cheek. “Angel is reaching out to you. Don’t be afraid to reach back.”
“I’ll try,” Axel whispered.
Clint kissed his lips. “That’s all anyone can do.” Discarding the damp towel, Clint nodded toward the door. “Ready?”
Releasing a slow breath, Axel smiled uncertainly. “Yeah.” He followed Clint to the door and watched as the cowboy unlocked it, his gaze drifting over the man’s body. “You’re my knight in shining armor,” he said softly, voice trembling. “You know that, right?”
Clint went still, his hand gripping the handle. “My armor was tarnished a long time ago,” he mumbled, eyes on the floor. He turned a fraction and cast Axel a sidelong glance. “Don’t put me on a pedestal, Axel.” Quiet fear shadowed his eyes as he opened the door and held it for Axel. “I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“That isn’t possible,” Axel assured him quietly with a light brush of his fingertips across Clint’s arm as he exited the restroom. The cowboy’s stare was heavy on his back a moment before Clint followed him out and let the door close. Just before he reached the main club entrance, Clint gripped his arm gently and brought him up short, kissing him soft on the lips. Axel’s heart shuddered as Clint held his eyes and a faint smile pulled at the corner of his mouth and his thumb caressed feather-light down Axel’s cheek.
The man spoke volumes with his faint smile and fleeting touch, and his “words” settled warmly deep in the center of Axel’s heart. I guess it just hit a little too close to reality…one I never thought I would ever have to deal with. Clint’s confession from earlier that morning drifted back in and the warmth in Axel’s heart spread out through his body.
What would it feel like to hear Clint say… I love you?
Axel pushed the thought away. Even if he came to feel it…a man like Clint might never be able to say it out loud. Could he himself even speak it aloud when or if the time came?
Concealing his thoughts, Axel walked with Clint out into the club. A different boy was dancing on stage, alone, and working up the small crowd. Axel spotted Angel on the far side of the club, Gavin was with him, holding the pup. A tiny twinge of jealousy flared then fizzled out just as quickly, leaving Axel puzzled by the sudden, brief spark. A quick glance at Clint, and he knew; Clint had given him Jonah. The pup had been like the final seal that bonded them. Axel couldn’t stop a part of him from wanting to keep Jonah all to himself. But the notion failed to take root when, even from across the club, he saw the joy on Gavin’s face. The kid had defended Jonah –to his own hurt. The pup might not be alive today if Gavin hadn’t stalled the abuser long enough for Clint to show up.
For that, he felt only gratitude towards the boy.
Clint touched his arm and Axel glanced up. “Go on,” Clint said quietly, nodding toward Angel. That faint smile played on his lips, doing funny things to Axel’s heart.
Releasing a shaky breath, Axel returned a smile of his own. He started to lean up and plant a kiss on Clint’s lips, then faltered and aborted when he spied the three men at the bar, watching them with intrigue. Suddenly self-conscious and uncertain about how comfortable Clint was with open, public affection, Axel left his side and weaved through the sparse customers, walking in Angel’s direction.
♦
The elusive kiss left
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