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Authors: Lisa O'Donnell
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a big wet dog. I feel embarrassed.
‘Michael,’ she says, ‘you want to see something?’
‘OK,’ I say.
‘But you can’t tell anyone,’ she says.
‘All right,’ I say.
She lifts up her skirts, pulls down her knickers and shows me her fanny. I’ve seen a fanny before. Paul MacDonald has a collection of them in his gorgeous magazines with the beautiful women, but this is different, and so I run away and think Marianne Cameron is a terrible girl. I want to tell my da but I can’t because then I would have to tell him about the bushes and the wet tongue and the wiggling about on top of Marianne Cameron and I don’t think he should know about these things.
I go straight home instead and even though Granny has bought ice cream from the van, my very favourite, I go straight upstairs and put my pyjamas on. I tell my da I am tired and don’t feel well. Everyone believes me because I am never sick and they know it is serious because I like ice cream more than anything in the world and would do anything to eat it, except today. Ma checks my head and says it’s a little warm. Da looks worried and Granny says she’ll put the ice cream in the freezer for me.
‘You can have it later,’ she says.
I turn on my side. I feel like crying. It is the worst day of my life.
FOURTEEN
THE WAR IS over and a man called Simon Weston is badly wounded. He is burned all over his body and has no face. He is a hero and everyone loves him.
‘It’s a terrible thing not to have a face,’ says Da.
‘It’s a terrible thing to have two of them,’ laughs Granny.
Ma laughs hard, she’s laughing more now, it’s a miracle, but Da goes mental and slams his fists so hard on the table the cups filled with tea spill to the floor.
‘Will no one talk about serious things in this house? Look at the man.’ He waves the paper in their faces. ‘He can’t run from his troubles. He looks at them every day in the mirror and he doesn’t turn away like a coward.’ He sits down, his face red with rage.
‘What the fuck do you know about serious things?’ says Ma. ‘You don’t even have a job and you haven’t even tried to find one.’
‘There are no jobs on this island!’ yells Da.
‘Then leave the fucking island. Go to the mainland. Travel on the boat every day. It’s not hard, Brian.’
‘Not for you, Rosemary, with your bloody professor to keep you company.’
‘Not this again.’
‘I can’t believe you told him,’ says Da. ‘Why would you do that? It’s supposed to be a secret. We’re going mad trying to keep it and you tell the first person that comes along. How could you do that to us?’
‘Do what?’
‘Tell a stranger.’
‘He’s not a stranger to me,’ screams Ma.
She stomps out of the room, she’s going anywhere to get away from Da, but he won’t be left behind in the kitchen and follows her to the stairs. I don’t know why everyone stomps everywhere in this house. It’s a small house and there are only a few places you can go anyhow. There’s the living room, the hall or one of the bedrooms upstairs. Never the bathroom, which I think is a good place to go because it has a lock on the door.
‘You think I don’t know what’s going on in Greenock, Rosemary, at your fancy college?’ he yells. ‘I’m no fool.’
I wonder what’s going on in Greenock.
From the top of the stairs she yells, ‘Not a bloody thing. I’m learning and you can’t stand it. He’s my teacher.’
‘But why did you tell him?’
‘I had no one else to tell,’ she screams.
‘You said no one was to know and the shite I’ve had to put up with on account of it, it isn’t fair. If you’re going to tell people then let’s tell people here, let’s tell the police. I can’t take another evil eye. Even in church the pew is all mine, no fucker will sit near me because they think I bash my wife.’
Granny can’t send me anywhere because it’s too late. I’ve already heard about the teacher and the secret Ma
‘Michael,’ she says, ‘you want to see something?’
‘OK,’ I say.
‘But you can’t tell anyone,’ she says.
‘All right,’ I say.
She lifts up her skirts, pulls down her knickers and shows me her fanny. I’ve seen a fanny before. Paul MacDonald has a collection of them in his gorgeous magazines with the beautiful women, but this is different, and so I run away and think Marianne Cameron is a terrible girl. I want to tell my da but I can’t because then I would have to tell him about the bushes and the wet tongue and the wiggling about on top of Marianne Cameron and I don’t think he should know about these things.
I go straight home instead and even though Granny has bought ice cream from the van, my very favourite, I go straight upstairs and put my pyjamas on. I tell my da I am tired and don’t feel well. Everyone believes me because I am never sick and they know it is serious because I like ice cream more than anything in the world and would do anything to eat it, except today. Ma checks my head and says it’s a little warm. Da looks worried and Granny says she’ll put the ice cream in the freezer for me.
‘You can have it later,’ she says.
I turn on my side. I feel like crying. It is the worst day of my life.
FOURTEEN
THE WAR IS over and a man called Simon Weston is badly wounded. He is burned all over his body and has no face. He is a hero and everyone loves him.
‘It’s a terrible thing not to have a face,’ says Da.
‘It’s a terrible thing to have two of them,’ laughs Granny.
Ma laughs hard, she’s laughing more now, it’s a miracle, but Da goes mental and slams his fists so hard on the table the cups filled with tea spill to the floor.
‘Will no one talk about serious things in this house? Look at the man.’ He waves the paper in their faces. ‘He can’t run from his troubles. He looks at them every day in the mirror and he doesn’t turn away like a coward.’ He sits down, his face red with rage.
‘What the fuck do you know about serious things?’ says Ma. ‘You don’t even have a job and you haven’t even tried to find one.’
‘There are no jobs on this island!’ yells Da.
‘Then leave the fucking island. Go to the mainland. Travel on the boat every day. It’s not hard, Brian.’
‘Not for you, Rosemary, with your bloody professor to keep you company.’
‘Not this again.’
‘I can’t believe you told him,’ says Da. ‘Why would you do that? It’s supposed to be a secret. We’re going mad trying to keep it and you tell the first person that comes along. How could you do that to us?’
‘Do what?’
‘Tell a stranger.’
‘He’s not a stranger to me,’ screams Ma.
She stomps out of the room, she’s going anywhere to get away from Da, but he won’t be left behind in the kitchen and follows her to the stairs. I don’t know why everyone stomps everywhere in this house. It’s a small house and there are only a few places you can go anyhow. There’s the living room, the hall or one of the bedrooms upstairs. Never the bathroom, which I think is a good place to go because it has a lock on the door.
‘You think I don’t know what’s going on in Greenock, Rosemary, at your fancy college?’ he yells. ‘I’m no fool.’
I wonder what’s going on in Greenock.
From the top of the stairs she yells, ‘Not a bloody thing. I’m learning and you can’t stand it. He’s my teacher.’
‘But why did you tell him?’
‘I had no one else to tell,’ she screams.
‘You said no one was to know and the shite I’ve had to put up with on account of it, it isn’t fair. If you’re going to tell people then let’s tell people here, let’s tell the police. I can’t take another evil eye. Even in church the pew is all mine, no fucker will sit near me because they think I bash my wife.’
Granny can’t send me anywhere because it’s too late. I’ve already heard about the teacher and the secret Ma
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