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Authors: Octavia E. Butler
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down, but stood in the middle of the room and looked at Blake. He looked back, realizing that for her sake, he could
not touch her either. Such a simple, terrible thing. He could not touch her.
"He said Meda scratched you," she whispered.
Blake nodded.
"He told me about the disease and . . . where he got it. I didn't know what to think. Do you believe him?"
" 'Her' in my case." Blake stared through the bars of the window into the desert night. "I believe. Maybe I shouldn't, but
I do."
"Rane always says I'll believe anything. At first, I was afraid to believe this. I do now, though."
"Have you seen Rane?"
"No. Daddy?"
He looked away from the bright full moon, met her eyes and saw that in a moment she would come to him, disease or
no disease.
"No!" he said sharply.
"Why?" she demanded. "What difference does it make? Someone's going to touch me sooner or later, anyway. And
even if they don't, I've probably already got the disease-from the salad or the bread or the furniture or the dishes . . .
What's the difference?" She wiped away tears angrily. She tended to cry when she got upset, whether she wanted to or
not.
"Why hasn't he touched you?"
She looked at Blake, looked away. "He likes me. He's afraid he'll kill me."
"I wonder how long that will stop him?"
"Not long. He obviously feels terrible. Sooner or later, he's going to just grab me."
Blake opened his bag again, turned it on, and keyed in a prescription form. "ARE YOU LOCKED UP?" he typed.
"ARE YOUR WINDOWS BARRED?"
She shook her head, mouthed, "No bars."
"THEN YOU CAN ESCAPE!"
"Alone?" she mouthed. She shook her head.
"YOU MUST!" he typed. "AT TWO A.M., I'LL TRY. I WANT YOU WITH ME!" Aloud, he said, "I can't help you,
Kerry."
"I know," she whispered. "Most of the time, I'm not even worried about myself. I'm worried about you and Rane. I
don't even know where Rane is."
He began typing soundlessly again. "THEN BREAK FREE ALONE! THEY THINK YOU'RE HELPLESS. THEY'LL
BE CARELESS WITH YOU."
She shook her head as she read the words. "I can't," she mouthed. "I can't!"
"Are you having any pain?" he asked aloud. "Did you take your medicine?"
"No pain," she said softly. "I had some, but I told Eli and he got my medicine from the car. He wore what he called his
town gloves." She glanced at the door. "He said if he wasn't careful, he could transmit the disease just by paying for
supplies. They all have to wear special gloves when they're in town."
"Yet they deliberately spread the disease to people like us," Blake said. He wiped everything he had typed and began
again on a clean form. "YOU MUST ESCAPE! THERE'S AN EPIDEMIC BREWING HERE! WE MUST GIVE
WARNING, GET TREATMENT!"
She was shaking her head again. God, why hadn't Meda sent Rane to him? Rane would be afraid, too, but that would
not stop her.
"EVEN IF I FAIL," he typed, "YOU MUST TAKE THE CAR AND GO--OR WE COULD ALL DIE. DO YOU
REMEMBER HOW TO START THE CAR WITHOUT THE KEY?"
She nodded.
"THEN CO! SEND BACK HELP. GIVE WARNING!"
Tears ran down her face, but she did not seem to notice them. He spoke aloud with painfully calculated brutality.
"Meda told me people with serious injuries die of the disease. She's seen them die. She didn't say anything about people
with serious illnesses, but Kerry, she didn't have to." He gave her a long look, trying to read her, reach her. She knew
he was right. She wanted to please him. But she had to overcome her own fear.
He typed, "SOONER OR LATER, ELI WILL TOUCH YOU-AT LEAST."
She read the words without responding.
"BE NEAR THE WAGONEER TONIGHT," he typed. "AT TWO."
She swallowed, nodded once.
At that moment, there was a sound at the door. Instantly, Blake shut off the computer, automatically wiping the
prescription form and everything he had typed. He closed the bag and turned to face the door just as Eli opened it.
Blake looked at Keira, aching to hug her. He felt he was about to lose her in one way or another, but he could not
not touch her either. Such a simple, terrible thing. He could not touch her.
"He said Meda scratched you," she whispered.
Blake nodded.
"He told me about the disease and . . . where he got it. I didn't know what to think. Do you believe him?"
" 'Her' in my case." Blake stared through the bars of the window into the desert night. "I believe. Maybe I shouldn't, but
I do."
"Rane always says I'll believe anything. At first, I was afraid to believe this. I do now, though."
"Have you seen Rane?"
"No. Daddy?"
He looked away from the bright full moon, met her eyes and saw that in a moment she would come to him, disease or
no disease.
"No!" he said sharply.
"Why?" she demanded. "What difference does it make? Someone's going to touch me sooner or later, anyway. And
even if they don't, I've probably already got the disease-from the salad or the bread or the furniture or the dishes . . .
What's the difference?" She wiped away tears angrily. She tended to cry when she got upset, whether she wanted to or
not.
"Why hasn't he touched you?"
She looked at Blake, looked away. "He likes me. He's afraid he'll kill me."
"I wonder how long that will stop him?"
"Not long. He obviously feels terrible. Sooner or later, he's going to just grab me."
Blake opened his bag again, turned it on, and keyed in a prescription form. "ARE YOU LOCKED UP?" he typed.
"ARE YOUR WINDOWS BARRED?"
She shook her head, mouthed, "No bars."
"THEN YOU CAN ESCAPE!"
"Alone?" she mouthed. She shook her head.
"YOU MUST!" he typed. "AT TWO A.M., I'LL TRY. I WANT YOU WITH ME!" Aloud, he said, "I can't help you,
Kerry."
"I know," she whispered. "Most of the time, I'm not even worried about myself. I'm worried about you and Rane. I
don't even know where Rane is."
He began typing soundlessly again. "THEN BREAK FREE ALONE! THEY THINK YOU'RE HELPLESS. THEY'LL
BE CARELESS WITH YOU."
She shook her head as she read the words. "I can't," she mouthed. "I can't!"
"Are you having any pain?" he asked aloud. "Did you take your medicine?"
"No pain," she said softly. "I had some, but I told Eli and he got my medicine from the car. He wore what he called his
town gloves." She glanced at the door. "He said if he wasn't careful, he could transmit the disease just by paying for
supplies. They all have to wear special gloves when they're in town."
"Yet they deliberately spread the disease to people like us," Blake said. He wiped everything he had typed and began
again on a clean form. "YOU MUST ESCAPE! THERE'S AN EPIDEMIC BREWING HERE! WE MUST GIVE
WARNING, GET TREATMENT!"
She was shaking her head again. God, why hadn't Meda sent Rane to him? Rane would be afraid, too, but that would
not stop her.
"EVEN IF I FAIL," he typed, "YOU MUST TAKE THE CAR AND GO--OR WE COULD ALL DIE. DO YOU
REMEMBER HOW TO START THE CAR WITHOUT THE KEY?"
She nodded.
"THEN CO! SEND BACK HELP. GIVE WARNING!"
Tears ran down her face, but she did not seem to notice them. He spoke aloud with painfully calculated brutality.
"Meda told me people with serious injuries die of the disease. She's seen them die. She didn't say anything about people
with serious illnesses, but Kerry, she didn't have to." He gave her a long look, trying to read her, reach her. She knew
he was right. She wanted to please him. But she had to overcome her own fear.
He typed, "SOONER OR LATER, ELI WILL TOUCH YOU-AT LEAST."
She read the words without responding.
"BE NEAR THE WAGONEER TONIGHT," he typed. "AT TWO."
She swallowed, nodded once.
At that moment, there was a sound at the door. Instantly, Blake shut off the computer, automatically wiping the
prescription form and everything he had typed. He closed the bag and turned to face the door just as Eli opened it.
Blake looked at Keira, aching to hug her. He felt he was about to lose her in one way or another, but he could not
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