Read Online [Churchminster #3] Wild Things by Jo Carnegie - Free Book Online

rectory. It was a square, rather gloomy building which stood a few hundred yards up the Bedlington Road. ‘G-good day to you, Mrs S-s-standington-Fulthrope!’
    ‘Ah, hello, Reverend,’ said Clementine. Much to the clergyman’s horror, Errol Flynn bounded up and shoved his nose in the Reverend’s crotch. ‘Errol! Get down,’ Clementine reprimanded, pulling him away. ‘I am sorry about that.’
    Reverend Bellows backed away. He was scared of animals, which didn’t help his cause in a parish where every second person had dogs and horses. ‘I just saw you through the window. Did you see the p-procession earlier?’ he asked eagerly.
    ‘I did indeed.’
    ‘Joyce and I have watched all of S-S-Sophia and Rafe’s films, you know, we’re quite a p-pair of film buffs. Although Joyce did find Rafe’s last one a little violent for her tastes.’ His eyes twinkled. ‘B-between you and me, I quite enjoyed it!’
    Dear Lord
, thought Clementine,
even the vicar’s had his head turned
. She had expected more from a man of the cloth.
    ‘Joyce and I are going to put our names down to be extras,’ said Reverend Bellows.
    Clementine arched an eyebrow. ‘My dear fellow, are you sure that’s entirely appropriate?’
    Reverend Bellows’s face fell. ‘Oh. D-do you think it’s a bad idea?’
    ‘I’m sure I can rely on your good judgement to make the right decision.’
    ‘What do you think?’ he asked anxiously. ‘I don’t want to offend my p-p-arishioners.’
    ‘My good man, it really isn’t my place to tell you what to do,’ she solemnly informed him.
    ‘I s-s-suppose you’re right,’ he said glumly. ‘How will people take me s-s-seriously in the pulpit if they’ve seen me as a toothless vagrant? It’s not the right message to send out.’
    ‘I think you’ve made the right choice, Reverend,’ Clementine told him. Saying her goodbyes, she started to pull Errol Flynn back towards the village green. At the phone box by the crossroads, she noticed a funny little man standing smoking a cigarette. As she approached, he flashed an over-friendly smile and flicked the butt on the ground. Clementine took an immediate dislike to him.
    ‘Lovely day!’ he said. ‘I bet there’s lots of excitement, what with all these big stars arriving, and whatnot.’
    ‘I really wouldn’t know,’ Clementine said.
    The man flashed stained teeth into what Clementine supposed was meant to be an ingratiating smile. ‘So where do you live, then?’
    ‘Not that it’s any of your business, but I live at Fairoaks. Just off the village green.’
    The man’s smile had faltered momentarily, but came back on again. ‘So you’re a local!’ He walked over to her. Clementine caught a whiff of stale smoke. ‘I think you and me could come to some sort of business arrangement. I’m after any stories of Rafe and Sophia I can get. You could tip me off with any gossip you get, sightings, that sort of thing. I’d pay you well, of course. What do you think?’
    ‘What I think,’ said Clementine, ‘is that you should bugger off.’ And with that, she marched off towards the village shop. Tying up Errol outside, Clementine pushed open the door and went in.
    Brenda was perched atop a rather precarious step-ladder, replenishing the top shelf.
    ‘Are you sure that’s safe?’ Clementine called up in alarm. ‘We can’t have you tumbling off and breaking your neck.’
    Brenda climbed down. ‘Don’t you worry about me Mrs S-F, this thing’s as steady as a rock. If I landed on me head, I’d probably bounce, anyway!’ She dusted off her hands. ‘What can I get you?’
    ‘Is the new
Cotswold Life
in yet?’
    Brenda winked. ‘Got your copy saved behind the counter.’
    As Clementine went over to pay, Brenda started talking about that morning’s events. ‘Ooh, I was ever so excited, I can tell you! Got up early and put my Sunday best on to watch it all. Ted thought I was mad. “What you doing that for, woman?” he kept asking.