Read Online Charlotte Figg Takes Over Paradise by Joyce Magnin - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Joyce Magnin
Tags: A Novel of Bright's Pond
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Greta's shoulder. "In the center, Greta. That's why they call it center field."
"Can you throw a ball, Greta?" asked Asa.
"Throw?" said Greta. "I can throw a full beer can from the kitchen door clear out back to Charlie."
"Good enough," I said.
I offered pie to all of the women and gave out assignments at the same time. I chose Gwendolyn, the tallest of the original three, to play first base. She seemed to like the notion well enough.
"Does that mean I get to bat first?" she asked.
"Not necessarily. We'll get to the line-up later."
Marlabeth Pilkey volunteered to play third base. "I got a wicked arm," she said. "I played ball with my brothers."
"Great." I gave her apple pie. "And I suppose you should be the team trainer also."
"Trainer?" She swallowed an apple slice whole, I thought.
"What kind of trainer?" she asked. "You mean like a dog trainer?"
"Oh, no, no. That's what we call the person who watches out for the health of the team, you know, taking care of sprains and cuts and bruises."
"Sure, I can do that. I got a remedy for whatever ails you."
Gwendolyn started to cry.
"There she goes again," Greta said. "She can turn on them waterworks whenever she wants."
"I think it's a hormone imbalance," Marlabeth said. "What she needs is some black cohosh—"
"Black cohosh," Francine said. "That's what you gave my mama for her hot flashes."
"That's right," Marlabeth said. "And valerian root, maybe some chamomile tea. And you can use some snark weed, Greta."
"Snark weed? What in blazes is snark weed?" asked Francine.
"Keeps people from being so snarky," Marlabeth said.
"No such thing," Greta said.
"Well, there should be a tea for mean people," Marlabeth said.
"I am not snarky or mean. Gwendolyn is a crybaby and everybody knows it. I'm just the only one who says it."
"Best to leave some opinions to yourself," Rose said.
Gwendolyn blubbered and waved the air in front of her face. "It ain't hormones. It's just that I never felt so happy. I always got chosen last, you know. Most humiliating thing ever to stand there while everyone else got picked. I can still hear Donna DelTorro saying, 'Okay, I'll take Gwen-do-nothinglynn,' like I was carrying typhoid."
Marlabeth handed Gwendolyn a box of Scotties Tissues."Who is Donna DelTorro?"
"It ain't important," Greta said.
It didn't take long before all the women in my trailer that evening had positions on the newly formed Paradise Women's Softball Team.
"I'm sorry, Charlotte," Greta said around nine o'clock, "but I need to get home. Ruth needs a good feeding and clean diaper—ha! So does Charlie."
The others echoed her.
"Okay, I will post another notice for the next team meeting and maybe our first practice. In the meantime, look around, we still need a left fielder and a right fielder and a couple or three alternates. And we need a name. Start thinking of some and we'll take a vote at the next meeting."
Asa and Rose hung around after the women left. Asa sat in the rocking chair with a kind of wide-eyed amazement on his face. "I wouldn't have believed it, Charlotte, if I hadn't seen it with my own two eyes."
Rose glanced skyward again. "It's a blessed day in Paradise. I do believe something powerful is happening. Charlotte, I knew the second I set eyes on you that a new day had dawned in Paradise."
I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "It's just a softball team, Rose. And it was your idea."
Asa helped himself to another slice of pie. "Now you just have to get the team organized." He laughed. "No easy task, I'm sure."
I watched him shovel a large forkful of apple crumb into his mouth and chew. "Team?" I said. "I don't have a team yet. Still need two players."
"They'll come," Rose said. "Just schedule a practice date. Steps of faith, Charlotte. Can't run all the bases in one night."
I gathered plates and napkins and started to tidy things up. At nine-thirty I was ready for Asa and Rose to go home. I was happy about the softball team, but I was also
"Can you throw a ball, Greta?" asked Asa.
"Throw?" said Greta. "I can throw a full beer can from the kitchen door clear out back to Charlie."
"Good enough," I said.
I offered pie to all of the women and gave out assignments at the same time. I chose Gwendolyn, the tallest of the original three, to play first base. She seemed to like the notion well enough.
"Does that mean I get to bat first?" she asked.
"Not necessarily. We'll get to the line-up later."
Marlabeth Pilkey volunteered to play third base. "I got a wicked arm," she said. "I played ball with my brothers."
"Great." I gave her apple pie. "And I suppose you should be the team trainer also."
"Trainer?" She swallowed an apple slice whole, I thought.
"What kind of trainer?" she asked. "You mean like a dog trainer?"
"Oh, no, no. That's what we call the person who watches out for the health of the team, you know, taking care of sprains and cuts and bruises."
"Sure, I can do that. I got a remedy for whatever ails you."
Gwendolyn started to cry.
"There she goes again," Greta said. "She can turn on them waterworks whenever she wants."
"I think it's a hormone imbalance," Marlabeth said. "What she needs is some black cohosh—"
"Black cohosh," Francine said. "That's what you gave my mama for her hot flashes."
"That's right," Marlabeth said. "And valerian root, maybe some chamomile tea. And you can use some snark weed, Greta."
"Snark weed? What in blazes is snark weed?" asked Francine.
"Keeps people from being so snarky," Marlabeth said.
"No such thing," Greta said.
"Well, there should be a tea for mean people," Marlabeth said.
"I am not snarky or mean. Gwendolyn is a crybaby and everybody knows it. I'm just the only one who says it."
"Best to leave some opinions to yourself," Rose said.
Gwendolyn blubbered and waved the air in front of her face. "It ain't hormones. It's just that I never felt so happy. I always got chosen last, you know. Most humiliating thing ever to stand there while everyone else got picked. I can still hear Donna DelTorro saying, 'Okay, I'll take Gwen-do-nothinglynn,' like I was carrying typhoid."
Marlabeth handed Gwendolyn a box of Scotties Tissues."Who is Donna DelTorro?"
"It ain't important," Greta said.
It didn't take long before all the women in my trailer that evening had positions on the newly formed Paradise Women's Softball Team.
"I'm sorry, Charlotte," Greta said around nine o'clock, "but I need to get home. Ruth needs a good feeding and clean diaper—ha! So does Charlie."
The others echoed her.
"Okay, I will post another notice for the next team meeting and maybe our first practice. In the meantime, look around, we still need a left fielder and a right fielder and a couple or three alternates. And we need a name. Start thinking of some and we'll take a vote at the next meeting."
Asa and Rose hung around after the women left. Asa sat in the rocking chair with a kind of wide-eyed amazement on his face. "I wouldn't have believed it, Charlotte, if I hadn't seen it with my own two eyes."
Rose glanced skyward again. "It's a blessed day in Paradise. I do believe something powerful is happening. Charlotte, I knew the second I set eyes on you that a new day had dawned in Paradise."
I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "It's just a softball team, Rose. And it was your idea."
Asa helped himself to another slice of pie. "Now you just have to get the team organized." He laughed. "No easy task, I'm sure."
I watched him shovel a large forkful of apple crumb into his mouth and chew. "Team?" I said. "I don't have a team yet. Still need two players."
"They'll come," Rose said. "Just schedule a practice date. Steps of faith, Charlotte. Can't run all the bases in one night."
I gathered plates and napkins and started to tidy things up. At nine-thirty I was ready for Asa and Rose to go home. I was happy about the softball team, but I was also
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