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Authors: Rachel Rittenhouse
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finally
getting over Momma’s death. But now…” I could feel her crying
beside me again.
What was I to do? Carolyn
had never come to me asking for advice before. I lay my head on her
shoulder. “I think you just need to open your heart and love Hannah
for who she is. No one will ever replace Momma in our hearts, and
I’m not all right with Momma not being here. I miss her terribly,
but I think you will find that the pain ceases when you come to
accept Hannah as another Momma.”
Carolyn didn’t say
anything for the longest time, and at first, I thought I had hurt
her feelings. Instead she leaned over and kissed my forehead. “When
did you become so wise, Bethy dear? I will try to love Hannah as
her own person, truly I will. You would’ve thought that after a
year, I would have. It just takes me a long time.”
We quieted down then to go
to sleep, but I could feel my mind going a hundred different
directions. Did I “forget” Momma too easily? Should I still be
holding on to the pain of losing her and not have accepted Momma
Hannah so quickly? I feel I have no answers for my questions and I
didn’t want to disturb Carolyn to ask her.
EXCERPT FROM
“ACCEPTING CHANGE”
Laura’s Diary
Friday, August 3, 1860
I am not a writer. I much
prefer playing out of doors with my brothers than any inside task
my sisters or Momma require of me. For whatever reason, my sisters
believe that because they enjoy writing in a diary, I would as
well. And now I am jumping ahead of myself. How Carolyn would scold
me if she read this!
My name is Laura Anne
Woodsmall. Today is my thirteenth birthday, which explains the gift
of the diary from my sisters. Here I was, hoping for something like
a horse to ride or seeds for my garden, but no. My sisters, Carolyn
and Bethany, adore traditions. Carolyn is always reminding us of
this tradition or that tradition. She and Bethany both received
diaries for their thirteenth birthday and thus assumed that I would
like one as well.
When I told Carolyn my
worries, her eyes just danced. "Dear Laura. Stop being so
pessimistic. You don't have to write in it every day. Besides you
may enjoy it."
"Not everyone is a writer
like you, Carolyn," I countered, which brought laughter from the
rest of my family.
Bethany gave me a hug,
"Not to worry. You won't turn into a writer, but please, try to
think positively about it."
And I am. I am trying to
think as Carolyn or Bethany would, but I find that I am not like
them in any way. I even asked Bethany what she wrote in her diary,
because I was afraid I didn't have anything to write about. She
only told me that I would find my own style. Well, that wasn’t very
helpful.
Deep breath. Think
positive thoughts.
As I said, I have two
older sisters. My oldest brother Jesse married Heather Bow in
February, 1859. They now live behind my house and through the
woods. It isn't very far, especially for a girl like me.
My step-brothers, Henry
and Jake, and I love to take walks through the woods. Well, they
are more like adventures. They used to not like it when I tagged
along, claiming that girls can't do the same things that boys do. I
soon proved them wrong. Now they pretty much allow me to go
anywhere I want with them.
Rosemary is the most
energetic of our family. She is my half-sister, born to my Poppa
and step-Momma. For only being a year and a half, Rosemary
certainly knows how to get around. She often follows me. But maybe
that is because it is usually my job to keep an eye on her. When
Momma and Bethany are in the kitchen, as soon as I finish chores or
schoolwork, I am asked to watch her until dinner.
Carolyn is home some too,
but now that she and Scott Harp are (finally!!) courting, we don't
see much of her. She is typically at the Harp's house or else Scott
is at our house. Carolyn visits Jesse and Heather as well. I think
she is yearning for when she will have her own house. Though I
suppose I will miss her quite a bit.
I
getting over Momma’s death. But now…” I could feel her crying
beside me again.
What was I to do? Carolyn
had never come to me asking for advice before. I lay my head on her
shoulder. “I think you just need to open your heart and love Hannah
for who she is. No one will ever replace Momma in our hearts, and
I’m not all right with Momma not being here. I miss her terribly,
but I think you will find that the pain ceases when you come to
accept Hannah as another Momma.”
Carolyn didn’t say
anything for the longest time, and at first, I thought I had hurt
her feelings. Instead she leaned over and kissed my forehead. “When
did you become so wise, Bethy dear? I will try to love Hannah as
her own person, truly I will. You would’ve thought that after a
year, I would have. It just takes me a long time.”
We quieted down then to go
to sleep, but I could feel my mind going a hundred different
directions. Did I “forget” Momma too easily? Should I still be
holding on to the pain of losing her and not have accepted Momma
Hannah so quickly? I feel I have no answers for my questions and I
didn’t want to disturb Carolyn to ask her.
EXCERPT FROM
“ACCEPTING CHANGE”
Laura’s Diary
Friday, August 3, 1860
I am not a writer. I much
prefer playing out of doors with my brothers than any inside task
my sisters or Momma require of me. For whatever reason, my sisters
believe that because they enjoy writing in a diary, I would as
well. And now I am jumping ahead of myself. How Carolyn would scold
me if she read this!
My name is Laura Anne
Woodsmall. Today is my thirteenth birthday, which explains the gift
of the diary from my sisters. Here I was, hoping for something like
a horse to ride or seeds for my garden, but no. My sisters, Carolyn
and Bethany, adore traditions. Carolyn is always reminding us of
this tradition or that tradition. She and Bethany both received
diaries for their thirteenth birthday and thus assumed that I would
like one as well.
When I told Carolyn my
worries, her eyes just danced. "Dear Laura. Stop being so
pessimistic. You don't have to write in it every day. Besides you
may enjoy it."
"Not everyone is a writer
like you, Carolyn," I countered, which brought laughter from the
rest of my family.
Bethany gave me a hug,
"Not to worry. You won't turn into a writer, but please, try to
think positively about it."
And I am. I am trying to
think as Carolyn or Bethany would, but I find that I am not like
them in any way. I even asked Bethany what she wrote in her diary,
because I was afraid I didn't have anything to write about. She
only told me that I would find my own style. Well, that wasn’t very
helpful.
Deep breath. Think
positive thoughts.
As I said, I have two
older sisters. My oldest brother Jesse married Heather Bow in
February, 1859. They now live behind my house and through the
woods. It isn't very far, especially for a girl like me.
My step-brothers, Henry
and Jake, and I love to take walks through the woods. Well, they
are more like adventures. They used to not like it when I tagged
along, claiming that girls can't do the same things that boys do. I
soon proved them wrong. Now they pretty much allow me to go
anywhere I want with them.
Rosemary is the most
energetic of our family. She is my half-sister, born to my Poppa
and step-Momma. For only being a year and a half, Rosemary
certainly knows how to get around. She often follows me. But maybe
that is because it is usually my job to keep an eye on her. When
Momma and Bethany are in the kitchen, as soon as I finish chores or
schoolwork, I am asked to watch her until dinner.
Carolyn is home some too,
but now that she and Scott Harp are (finally!!) courting, we don't
see much of her. She is typically at the Harp's house or else Scott
is at our house. Carolyn visits Jesse and Heather as well. I think
she is yearning for when she will have her own house. Though I
suppose I will miss her quite a bit.
I
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