evening, when I wasn’t thinking about anything, when I was just hanging around with nothing to do, I’d suddenly come across the phone and ring the number before my brain had a chance to stop me.
As I said, I didn’t really think it’d work. I mean, when you’re trying not to think about something, it can easily become the only thing you can think about. And when you’re trying to forget your cell phone, it can easily become the only thing you can remember. You can’t stop seeing it, in your head, all day…just lying there, exactly where you left it. And you know that later on, after school, sometime in the evening, you won’t be hanging around with nothing to do, not thinking about anything, and you won’t suddenly come across the phone and ring the number before your brain has a chance to stop you.
So you are worse off than you were before.
So you have got something to lose.
Unless, of course, you double-double-cross yourself by jumping into a phone booth on the way home and punching in the number before you realize what you’re doing.
The phone hissed emptily for a second or two, and I wondered if I’d dialed the wrong number, but then the line kicked in with an electric crackle and it started ringing. The familiar tone buzzed through my head— dee-dee…dee-dee…dee-dee… the sound of waiting, of hoping, of not knowing—and I could feel my heart thumping hard in my chest, my throat tightening, my fingers tingling…and then the line clicked and the ringing stopped and Candy’s voice came on.
“Yeah?”
She sounded harsh and hurried, hard and abrupt, her voice a bit slurred. Not quite what I was expecting. But at least it wasn’t Iggy.
“Hello?” I said. “Is that Candy?”
“Yeah…hold on.” The phone got muffled, covered by a hand, and I could hear low voices mumbling in the background. Female voices…a shout…a laugh…then the line opened up again and Candy came back on. “Yeah…hello?”
“Candy?” I said. “It’s Joe…”
“Who?”
“Joe…Joe Beck.”
“Bet? ”
“No, Beck…B-E-C-K. Joe Beck. We met last week…Thursday…I saw you at the station—”
“Where?”
“King’s Cross—”
“When?”
“Thursday,” I said, my heart sinking fast. “Last Thursday…” I looked down at the credit display on the phone, staring blankly at the numbers, wondering if it was worth putting any more money in. She obviously didn’t remember me. Why bother prolonging things? Why not just say good-bye and hang up?
But then her voice piped up—“Joe!”—and she suddenly sounded fresh and excited. “Joe from McDonald’s?”
“Yeah…”
“God—why didn’t you say? Lumpy Joe, right? The guy who dropped all his money?”
“Yeah…”
“Joe the Hat.”
I laughed.
“Christ,” she said, “you took your time, didn’t you? Why didn’t you ring me?”
“I just did.”
“It’s been over a week. ”
“Yeah, I know…I’m sorry…I didn’t know…”
“I wanted to talk to you.”
A warm glow ballooned in my chest. She wanted to talk to me…she wanted to talk to me! The pips went and I stuck some more coins in.
“Joe?” Candy said. “Are you still there?”
“Yeah…I was just…”
“Are you all right?”
“Yeah…great.”
“How’s the lump?”
“It’s gone now. The doctor sucked it out—”
“He what? ”
“With a needle…he sucked out all the goo with a needle. It’s fine now.”
“You’re not lumpy anymore?”
“No.”
“Well, that’s good. How’s the group going? The Katies. You made it big yet?”
“Not quite.”
She sniffed, and I heard her lighting a cigarette.
I said, “How are you doing? Is everything OK?”
“Yeah,” she said breezily, “you know…same old stuff. Anyway, it’s really good to talk to you, Joe. I’ve been waiting for you to call.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, really.” She cleared her throat. “Look, about what happened…with Iggy and everything…”
I waited for her to go
As I said, I didn’t really think it’d work. I mean, when you’re trying not to think about something, it can easily become the only thing you can think about. And when you’re trying to forget your cell phone, it can easily become the only thing you can remember. You can’t stop seeing it, in your head, all day…just lying there, exactly where you left it. And you know that later on, after school, sometime in the evening, you won’t be hanging around with nothing to do, not thinking about anything, and you won’t suddenly come across the phone and ring the number before your brain has a chance to stop you.
So you are worse off than you were before.
So you have got something to lose.
Unless, of course, you double-double-cross yourself by jumping into a phone booth on the way home and punching in the number before you realize what you’re doing.
The phone hissed emptily for a second or two, and I wondered if I’d dialed the wrong number, but then the line kicked in with an electric crackle and it started ringing. The familiar tone buzzed through my head— dee-dee…dee-dee…dee-dee… the sound of waiting, of hoping, of not knowing—and I could feel my heart thumping hard in my chest, my throat tightening, my fingers tingling…and then the line clicked and the ringing stopped and Candy’s voice came on.
“Yeah?”
She sounded harsh and hurried, hard and abrupt, her voice a bit slurred. Not quite what I was expecting. But at least it wasn’t Iggy.
“Hello?” I said. “Is that Candy?”
“Yeah…hold on.” The phone got muffled, covered by a hand, and I could hear low voices mumbling in the background. Female voices…a shout…a laugh…then the line opened up again and Candy came back on. “Yeah…hello?”
“Candy?” I said. “It’s Joe…”
“Who?”
“Joe…Joe Beck.”
“Bet? ”
“No, Beck…B-E-C-K. Joe Beck. We met last week…Thursday…I saw you at the station—”
“Where?”
“King’s Cross—”
“When?”
“Thursday,” I said, my heart sinking fast. “Last Thursday…” I looked down at the credit display on the phone, staring blankly at the numbers, wondering if it was worth putting any more money in. She obviously didn’t remember me. Why bother prolonging things? Why not just say good-bye and hang up?
But then her voice piped up—“Joe!”—and she suddenly sounded fresh and excited. “Joe from McDonald’s?”
“Yeah…”
“God—why didn’t you say? Lumpy Joe, right? The guy who dropped all his money?”
“Yeah…”
“Joe the Hat.”
I laughed.
“Christ,” she said, “you took your time, didn’t you? Why didn’t you ring me?”
“I just did.”
“It’s been over a week. ”
“Yeah, I know…I’m sorry…I didn’t know…”
“I wanted to talk to you.”
A warm glow ballooned in my chest. She wanted to talk to me…she wanted to talk to me! The pips went and I stuck some more coins in.
“Joe?” Candy said. “Are you still there?”
“Yeah…I was just…”
“Are you all right?”
“Yeah…great.”
“How’s the lump?”
“It’s gone now. The doctor sucked it out—”
“He what? ”
“With a needle…he sucked out all the goo with a needle. It’s fine now.”
“You’re not lumpy anymore?”
“No.”
“Well, that’s good. How’s the group going? The Katies. You made it big yet?”
“Not quite.”
She sniffed, and I heard her lighting a cigarette.
I said, “How are you doing? Is everything OK?”
“Yeah,” she said breezily, “you know…same old stuff. Anyway, it’s really good to talk to you, Joe. I’ve been waiting for you to call.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, really.” She cleared her throat. “Look, about what happened…with Iggy and everything…”
I waited for her to go
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