Read Online Burned by Ellen Hopkins - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Ellen Hopkins
Tags: Religión, Fiction, General, Mystery & Detective, Family, Juvenile Fiction, Sex, Psychology, Social Issues, Religious, Christian, Christianity, Parents, Values & Virtues, Teenage girls, Psychopathology, Self-Esteem & Self-Reliance, Aunts, Problem families, Dysfunctional families, Identity, Alcoholism, Drugs; Alcohol; Substance Abuse, Addiction, Nevada, Physical & Emotional Abuse, Novels in Verse, Family Problems, Identity (Psychology), Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon), Mormons
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gearshift into P for park. Aunt J came around and took the wheel, and as I scooted my black-and-blue butt across the seat,
I vowed to weasel her secrets, however dark they might be.
217
A t the Feed Store
I followed Aunt J inside, letting my eyes adjust to filtered light and my nose admire the potpourri.
Leather.
Grain.
Alfalfa.
Aunt J disappeared out back
while I wandered over to a far wall, drawn by a riot of sound.
Cheeps.
Scuffs.
Hisses.
Yellow fluffs under warming
lamps, sifting through scratch and testing stumpy wings.
Chicks.
Ducklings.
Goslings.
Finally, I heard Aunt J. I Turned to see her talking to a guy with a vaguely familiär voice.
Tall.
Built.
Gorgeous.
218
Gorgeous? Ethan! And I hadn't
even brushed my hair! I hurried
outside, hoping he wouldn't see me.
Ha
Ha
219
He Trailed Aunt J
To the pickup, carrying a fifty-pound sack of cracked com like burlap-wrapped feathers, tossed it in the bed, went back for another.
I dropped my face, so he wouldn't notice
its ordinariness as he passed the window.
I'm pretty sure he glanced my way once or twice, Walking by. Striding by, with long, lean legs, hugged tight by Wranglers.
I pretended not to watch, but the corner of my eye caught every little detail.
The way he moved. How his muscles flexed.
Facial structure. The vrvid green of his eyes beneath a long wave of hair, mink brown.
Justin and Derek could eat their hearts out--
if Tiffany and Carmen didn't beat them to it.
220
Three sacks of grain and a bag of dog food
later, he thanked Aunt J and started off.
At the door he Turned, and I just about died
when he flashed me his should-be-famous
smile and mouthed, See you soon.
221
See Me Soon?
What did he mean by that?
Did I care?
Considering recent events,
I shouldn't care.
I was going to stay innocent.
Men were evil.
I was going to die celibate.
Men were trouble.
I would not date again.
Men lied.
I would not marry, ever.
Men cheated.
No man would own me.
So why, despite all of the above, was I, so suddenly and completely
fascinated with this man?
222
Aunt J Knew, Too
He's cute, huh?
Cute did not define it. "I guess.
Who is he, anyway?"
Ethan is the son of an old friend.
Ah. Things were getting clearer.
But. . . "His mom or his dad?"
Both, but mostly his dad.
We were almost on a roll.
"So, um ... he lives around here?"
Just outside of Caliente.
We lived just outside of Caliente.
"Near the ranch?"
Right down the road. Why?
Why, indeed? "No special reason except he said he'd see me soon."
He will. He's helping us move the cattle.
Oh brother. I felt like a total
dolt. "Oh, okay."
Ifigured someone with experience couldn't hurt.
Someone without a bruised butt, she meant. "Probably not."
Especially someone cute.
223
Was she playing matchmaker?
I smiled. "When's he Coming?"
Next Sunday. It's his day off.
Next Sunday? Eight whole days
away? "Not tomorrow?"
He and his dad have plans.
I decided to fish a little. "Don't you
ever go to sacrament meetings?"
Not this ol' bird.
You're free to go.
Free not to go was more accurate.
"But you're Mormon, aren't you?"
Was once. Gave up on it, though.
The ice had been broken--chipped, anyway. "How come?"
Long story, one you
maybe shouldn't hear.
One I had to hear, now. "I want to know, Aunt J. Need to know."
Maybe öfter supper.
I have to unload thefeed.
224
I t Seemed Like Forever
But after dinner, we settled into chairs on the porch.
The dogs parked at our feet, and cats rubbed up into our laps as Aunt J spilled her tale.
You might think Fve never been in love, but you'd be wrong. I was seventeen,
Kevin was eighteen. And he wasn't Mormon.
I was so much like you, Pattyn.
Füll of life, füll of hope.
And I fell desperately in love with a man neither my family nor my church would ever accept.
Intergenerational dejä vu?
My stomach churned.
I kept right on seeing him anyway.
We planned to marry, just as soon as I graduated high school.
I vowed to weasel her secrets, however dark they might be.
217
A t the Feed Store
I followed Aunt J inside, letting my eyes adjust to filtered light and my nose admire the potpourri.
Leather.
Grain.
Alfalfa.
Aunt J disappeared out back
while I wandered over to a far wall, drawn by a riot of sound.
Cheeps.
Scuffs.
Hisses.
Yellow fluffs under warming
lamps, sifting through scratch and testing stumpy wings.
Chicks.
Ducklings.
Goslings.
Finally, I heard Aunt J. I Turned to see her talking to a guy with a vaguely familiär voice.
Tall.
Built.
Gorgeous.
218
Gorgeous? Ethan! And I hadn't
even brushed my hair! I hurried
outside, hoping he wouldn't see me.
Ha
Ha
219
He Trailed Aunt J
To the pickup, carrying a fifty-pound sack of cracked com like burlap-wrapped feathers, tossed it in the bed, went back for another.
I dropped my face, so he wouldn't notice
its ordinariness as he passed the window.
I'm pretty sure he glanced my way once or twice, Walking by. Striding by, with long, lean legs, hugged tight by Wranglers.
I pretended not to watch, but the corner of my eye caught every little detail.
The way he moved. How his muscles flexed.
Facial structure. The vrvid green of his eyes beneath a long wave of hair, mink brown.
Justin and Derek could eat their hearts out--
if Tiffany and Carmen didn't beat them to it.
220
Three sacks of grain and a bag of dog food
later, he thanked Aunt J and started off.
At the door he Turned, and I just about died
when he flashed me his should-be-famous
smile and mouthed, See you soon.
221
See Me Soon?
What did he mean by that?
Did I care?
Considering recent events,
I shouldn't care.
I was going to stay innocent.
Men were evil.
I was going to die celibate.
Men were trouble.
I would not date again.
Men lied.
I would not marry, ever.
Men cheated.
No man would own me.
So why, despite all of the above, was I, so suddenly and completely
fascinated with this man?
222
Aunt J Knew, Too
He's cute, huh?
Cute did not define it. "I guess.
Who is he, anyway?"
Ethan is the son of an old friend.
Ah. Things were getting clearer.
But. . . "His mom or his dad?"
Both, but mostly his dad.
We were almost on a roll.
"So, um ... he lives around here?"
Just outside of Caliente.
We lived just outside of Caliente.
"Near the ranch?"
Right down the road. Why?
Why, indeed? "No special reason except he said he'd see me soon."
He will. He's helping us move the cattle.
Oh brother. I felt like a total
dolt. "Oh, okay."
Ifigured someone with experience couldn't hurt.
Someone without a bruised butt, she meant. "Probably not."
Especially someone cute.
223
Was she playing matchmaker?
I smiled. "When's he Coming?"
Next Sunday. It's his day off.
Next Sunday? Eight whole days
away? "Not tomorrow?"
He and his dad have plans.
I decided to fish a little. "Don't you
ever go to sacrament meetings?"
Not this ol' bird.
You're free to go.
Free not to go was more accurate.
"But you're Mormon, aren't you?"
Was once. Gave up on it, though.
The ice had been broken--chipped, anyway. "How come?"
Long story, one you
maybe shouldn't hear.
One I had to hear, now. "I want to know, Aunt J. Need to know."
Maybe öfter supper.
I have to unload thefeed.
224
I t Seemed Like Forever
But after dinner, we settled into chairs on the porch.
The dogs parked at our feet, and cats rubbed up into our laps as Aunt J spilled her tale.
You might think Fve never been in love, but you'd be wrong. I was seventeen,
Kevin was eighteen. And he wasn't Mormon.
I was so much like you, Pattyn.
Füll of life, füll of hope.
And I fell desperately in love with a man neither my family nor my church would ever accept.
Intergenerational dejä vu?
My stomach churned.
I kept right on seeing him anyway.
We planned to marry, just as soon as I graduated high school.
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