picture—though he did manage the
numbers on his patch honestly and well.
He had the territory from his cousin Green Bean Ractic. Green Bean
killed two birds with one rockhead. He found a relative a job and he
put the patch in the hands of a guy who didn’t have imagination enough
to skim.
Squint Vrolet didn’t even have imagination enough to take advantage
of the fact that he was a known gangster.
“I talk to myself, Squint. Because I know somebody who cares is
listening.”
Squint squinted. It was his signature move. “That’s right. You don’t
got that frickin’ parrot no more? Them elves done conned you out of
him.”
“Somebody ran a con on somebody, Squint. So what’s your take on
tonight? Is it true, Chodo’s gonna retire and leave everything to his
kid?”
Squint gawked. “I never heard that. Hey! Great to see you, G. But I
got to go see a man about a dog.” He headed straight for his cousin
Green Bean instead of the garderobes, though.
Melondie Kadare told me, “That was mean, Garrett.”
“When he comes to double-check if he heard right, I’ll twist it
around.”
“Why torment him?”
“I’m not. I’m messing with Green Bean. He’ll be sure Squint heard
something important but got it twisted between his ears and his mouth.”
“That’s still cruel.”
“Don’t you do that to me?”
“No.”
“You sure?”
“Sure, I’m sure. I can think of more amusing ways to mess with you.
One of your sweeties drops by. Say, Tinnie Tate. I slide in and whisper
some other honey’s name in the redhead’s ear at just the right time…”
“That don’t sound like fun.”
“Not for you. I’d laugh till I puked and my wings fell off. Tinnie’s
too good for you, anyway… Whoa! Peace! Just teasing. You’d better
mingle. So that something
unexpected doesn’t happen.”
“You might think about getting in the psychic racket.”
Belinda turned. She’d changed clothes again, to something more
businesslike. “I sent that woman to the Bledsoe. Under my name. Would
you check on her tomorrow? Make sure they’re really treating her?”
“Sure.” So she expected me to have a tomorrow. Good to know.
“What do you think happened?” she asked.
“I don’t. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“You think there’s something strange going on?”
“Is that a trick question?”
“Garrett, don’t do that. I’m not in the mood. I feel this getting
out of hand before it even starts.”
“All right, yes. There’s something strange going on. I just figured
you were behind it.”
“There’re rats everywhere. There weren’t any when I looked at the
place. And there’s your kittens. Cute and friendly buggers, but still
cats. You shouldn’t have brought them. And, I swear, I even saw pixies
from the corner of my eye. Only they weren’t there when I looked.”
That was the essence of pixie. Delivering more annoyance than a
gaggle of mosquitoes.
“Watch my back, Garrett.”
“I always do.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s a lovely back.”
“You’re full of shit. But I like it. I think.”
Moments later, Melondie Kadare sneered, “It’s such a lovely back?
Could you be any more lame?”
“I wasn’t at my best. I was distracted. I had a big-ass bug buzzing
in my ear. And a lovely back to contemplate.”
Miss Kadare bit me on the aforementioned ear. “You’re lucky I’m not
your size.”
15
The celebration got started. It rolled along just fine. Night fell.
Morley’s waitstaff fired the floating wicks of globular little oil
lamps at each place at table. They poured wine, TunFaire Gold, the best
rotted grape juice in the world. The bad guys settled themselves and
sucked it down. They got happier by the minute. The majority seemed
amazed to find themselves having a good time. But whenever somebody
cracked a dirty punch line the astonishment went away for a minute.
I was surprised by the number of guests. Not only the underbosses
and their lieutenants had
numbers on his patch honestly and well.
He had the territory from his cousin Green Bean Ractic. Green Bean
killed two birds with one rockhead. He found a relative a job and he
put the patch in the hands of a guy who didn’t have imagination enough
to skim.
Squint Vrolet didn’t even have imagination enough to take advantage
of the fact that he was a known gangster.
“I talk to myself, Squint. Because I know somebody who cares is
listening.”
Squint squinted. It was his signature move. “That’s right. You don’t
got that frickin’ parrot no more? Them elves done conned you out of
him.”
“Somebody ran a con on somebody, Squint. So what’s your take on
tonight? Is it true, Chodo’s gonna retire and leave everything to his
kid?”
Squint gawked. “I never heard that. Hey! Great to see you, G. But I
got to go see a man about a dog.” He headed straight for his cousin
Green Bean instead of the garderobes, though.
Melondie Kadare told me, “That was mean, Garrett.”
“When he comes to double-check if he heard right, I’ll twist it
around.”
“Why torment him?”
“I’m not. I’m messing with Green Bean. He’ll be sure Squint heard
something important but got it twisted between his ears and his mouth.”
“That’s still cruel.”
“Don’t you do that to me?”
“No.”
“You sure?”
“Sure, I’m sure. I can think of more amusing ways to mess with you.
One of your sweeties drops by. Say, Tinnie Tate. I slide in and whisper
some other honey’s name in the redhead’s ear at just the right time…”
“That don’t sound like fun.”
“Not for you. I’d laugh till I puked and my wings fell off. Tinnie’s
too good for you, anyway… Whoa! Peace! Just teasing. You’d better
mingle. So that something
unexpected doesn’t happen.”
“You might think about getting in the psychic racket.”
Belinda turned. She’d changed clothes again, to something more
businesslike. “I sent that woman to the Bledsoe. Under my name. Would
you check on her tomorrow? Make sure they’re really treating her?”
“Sure.” So she expected me to have a tomorrow. Good to know.
“What do you think happened?” she asked.
“I don’t. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“You think there’s something strange going on?”
“Is that a trick question?”
“Garrett, don’t do that. I’m not in the mood. I feel this getting
out of hand before it even starts.”
“All right, yes. There’s something strange going on. I just figured
you were behind it.”
“There’re rats everywhere. There weren’t any when I looked at the
place. And there’s your kittens. Cute and friendly buggers, but still
cats. You shouldn’t have brought them. And, I swear, I even saw pixies
from the corner of my eye. Only they weren’t there when I looked.”
That was the essence of pixie. Delivering more annoyance than a
gaggle of mosquitoes.
“Watch my back, Garrett.”
“I always do.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s a lovely back.”
“You’re full of shit. But I like it. I think.”
Moments later, Melondie Kadare sneered, “It’s such a lovely back?
Could you be any more lame?”
“I wasn’t at my best. I was distracted. I had a big-ass bug buzzing
in my ear. And a lovely back to contemplate.”
Miss Kadare bit me on the aforementioned ear. “You’re lucky I’m not
your size.”
15
The celebration got started. It rolled along just fine. Night fell.
Morley’s waitstaff fired the floating wicks of globular little oil
lamps at each place at table. They poured wine, TunFaire Gold, the best
rotted grape juice in the world. The bad guys settled themselves and
sucked it down. They got happier by the minute. The majority seemed
amazed to find themselves having a good time. But whenever somebody
cracked a dirty punch line the astonishment went away for a minute.
I was surprised by the number of guests. Not only the underbosses
and their lieutenants had
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