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Authors: Jami Alden
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in her gut at the memory of that night.
At the fact that she'd never had the decency to apologize for the things she'd said.
One thing her mother had taught her, and one thing she was trying to instill in Anthony at even his young age, was to have the courage to own up when you've wronged someone or messed up.
Even if it didn't do any good. Hell, she'd spent the last year apologizing to the people Troy had screwed over, privately and to whatever news outlet would broadcast it, and all she'd gotten out of it was her own clean conscience.
Yet she'd treated one of the people she'd loved most in the world horribly and never had the guts to tell him she was sorry.
Damon might not accept it, but Ellie knew she couldn't do anything until she cleared the air, the weight of it like an anvil on her chest.
She was up as soon as the sun came up, surprising Adele in the kitchen where she was brewing a pot of coffee.
"What are you doing up so early?" her mother asked as she poured coffee into a mug and slid it across the counter to her.
"I woke up a while ago and couldn't get back to sleep. I had some things on my mind." Ellie shrugged.
"So that's why you look so haggard."
"I guess," Ellie said with shake of her head. Sometimes she wished her mom would be a little less honest. Harsh words aside, Ellie leaned in eagerly when her mother pulled her close and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
"Whatever it is, I'm sure it will work itself out," she said and gave her a tight squeeze.
Ellie leaned in, breathing in the familiar smells of her mother's face cream and laundry detergent.
"Here," Adele released her and reached for the ceramic cookie jar tucked into the corner. "They're your favorite. Chocolate chip crisp. That'll get your morning on the right track." Ellie smiled faintly. Sometimes she wished she could just be a little girl again, with problems that could be fixed with a snuggle on Mommy's lap and a couple of cookies.
Although, as she bit into the palm size cookie, tasted the slightly salty crunch of the puffed rice bits and the melting sweetness of dark chocolate on her tongue, she did feel just the slightest bit better.
After Adele left for the restaurant Ellie polished off two more cookies with her coffee. Her lips quirked into a mirthless smile as she imagined what all of her no carb no sugar no dairy no deliciousness friends would think of her breakfast. Three full fat cookies and coffee with—gasp—half and half?
Heresy.
She looked at the clock on the microwave, eager to get out and complete her mission before she chickened out. To her dismay, it was only just after seven. No way Anthony would be up for at least another hour.
Brain relatively cobweb free thanks to three cups of coffee—not to mention a massive sugar rush—she decided to take advantage of the quiet by taking a shower.
Afterward, she stared in the mirror and glumly conceded her mother was right. She did look like hell. Not just from last night. The last year had been hell. Her skin was stretched a little too tight across her high cheekbones and her blue eyes looked sunken and framed by dark circles.
She pulled out her makeup bag and went to work, taking extra time with the concealer and highlighter to take the edge off the haggard lines.
Afterward she took extra time to blowout her hair, until it hung in a straight fall down her back. All the while telling herself she wasn't doing it to impress Damon, but so she could feel more confident going into a sticky social situation.
And the reason she paired her sleeveless white top with a bright green mini skirt and wedge sandals that made her legs look a hundred feet long had nothing to do with impressing him either.
Anthony shuffled in as she was getting dressed, his wavy hair standing up on end, his eyes bleary with sleep. "Hey, Mama."
As it did every morning, her heart melted a little as she pulled him close and buried her face against his wild, dark hair and breathed his little boy
At the fact that she'd never had the decency to apologize for the things she'd said.
One thing her mother had taught her, and one thing she was trying to instill in Anthony at even his young age, was to have the courage to own up when you've wronged someone or messed up.
Even if it didn't do any good. Hell, she'd spent the last year apologizing to the people Troy had screwed over, privately and to whatever news outlet would broadcast it, and all she'd gotten out of it was her own clean conscience.
Yet she'd treated one of the people she'd loved most in the world horribly and never had the guts to tell him she was sorry.
Damon might not accept it, but Ellie knew she couldn't do anything until she cleared the air, the weight of it like an anvil on her chest.
She was up as soon as the sun came up, surprising Adele in the kitchen where she was brewing a pot of coffee.
"What are you doing up so early?" her mother asked as she poured coffee into a mug and slid it across the counter to her.
"I woke up a while ago and couldn't get back to sleep. I had some things on my mind." Ellie shrugged.
"So that's why you look so haggard."
"I guess," Ellie said with shake of her head. Sometimes she wished her mom would be a little less honest. Harsh words aside, Ellie leaned in eagerly when her mother pulled her close and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
"Whatever it is, I'm sure it will work itself out," she said and gave her a tight squeeze.
Ellie leaned in, breathing in the familiar smells of her mother's face cream and laundry detergent.
"Here," Adele released her and reached for the ceramic cookie jar tucked into the corner. "They're your favorite. Chocolate chip crisp. That'll get your morning on the right track." Ellie smiled faintly. Sometimes she wished she could just be a little girl again, with problems that could be fixed with a snuggle on Mommy's lap and a couple of cookies.
Although, as she bit into the palm size cookie, tasted the slightly salty crunch of the puffed rice bits and the melting sweetness of dark chocolate on her tongue, she did feel just the slightest bit better.
After Adele left for the restaurant Ellie polished off two more cookies with her coffee. Her lips quirked into a mirthless smile as she imagined what all of her no carb no sugar no dairy no deliciousness friends would think of her breakfast. Three full fat cookies and coffee with—gasp—half and half?
Heresy.
She looked at the clock on the microwave, eager to get out and complete her mission before she chickened out. To her dismay, it was only just after seven. No way Anthony would be up for at least another hour.
Brain relatively cobweb free thanks to three cups of coffee—not to mention a massive sugar rush—she decided to take advantage of the quiet by taking a shower.
Afterward, she stared in the mirror and glumly conceded her mother was right. She did look like hell. Not just from last night. The last year had been hell. Her skin was stretched a little too tight across her high cheekbones and her blue eyes looked sunken and framed by dark circles.
She pulled out her makeup bag and went to work, taking extra time with the concealer and highlighter to take the edge off the haggard lines.
Afterward she took extra time to blowout her hair, until it hung in a straight fall down her back. All the while telling herself she wasn't doing it to impress Damon, but so she could feel more confident going into a sticky social situation.
And the reason she paired her sleeveless white top with a bright green mini skirt and wedge sandals that made her legs look a hundred feet long had nothing to do with impressing him either.
Anthony shuffled in as she was getting dressed, his wavy hair standing up on end, his eyes bleary with sleep. "Hey, Mama."
As it did every morning, her heart melted a little as she pulled him close and buried her face against his wild, dark hair and breathed his little boy
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