Bingo Barge Murder

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Authors: Jessie Chandler.
Tags: Fiction, Mystery, regional, Lesbian, Minnesota, soft-boiled, murder mystery, Bingo
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truck’s wheels won the fight and gripped asphalt, a lone figure careened out of the woods at a dead run and launched himself headlong into the bed of the pickup. The truck swayed with the sudden weight as Eddy peeled out of the lot. I twisted around, fingers digging into the headrest.
    Coop’s arm stuck straight up out of the bed of the truck, the videotape clutched triumphantly in his hand.
    _____
    How we made it home in one piece, I have no idea. Coop disappeared the moment Eddy pulled the truck in the garage. I followed Eddy into the kitchen and watched as she spiked hot chocolate with a liberal splash of peppermint schnapps and we regrouped around the table in the loft.
    “Thanks for making me ride in the back the whole way home,” Coop said once he settled in.
    “I wasn’t about to stop just to let you in the cab. What if those bums were right behind us? No, sir. Once we were cruising, I wasn’t stopping!” Eddy pursed her lips and shook her head. “How on earth did you manage to get away from that mess, Nicholas?”
    I sipped my cocoa. The hot chocolate was laced with so much booze that it made me shudder, and heat oozed down my chest like lava.
    “I got a hold of that damn tape and made a mad dash for the front doors. Those two wackos came racing out after me. I crossed the gangway, and then there was this huge crash behind me. Both of them were down flopping around on the dock like catfish in the bottom of a boat. The dude in the front must’ve hit one of the warped planks on the dock and tripped them both up.” He eyed Eddy. “I thought you were gonna leave me in the dust there for a minute, Lead Foot.”
    Eddy’s face crinkled, threatening a smile. “You ain’t seen nothing yet, kid.”
    Coop turned on the 12-inch TV, fed the cassette into the VCR, and once again watched the hard-won tape on fast-forward. After Coop exited the office, nothing happened for what felt like many long minutes.
    My eyeballs were drying out from staring at the screen. I forced a blink as Kinky entered the scene and disappeared from the shot, presumably sitting down behind his desk.
    “There! Stop the tape!” I nearly tipped my chair over lunging for the VCR. Coop beat me to it and pressed the play button. The picture slowed down to real time.
    A hefty man with a rotund belly appeared. Dressed in a black jacket and dark pants, he stood facing the desk. Gesturing wildly, his arms flapped like a bird’s. Kinky sauntered into the picture again and leaned against the edge of his desk, a cajoling look on his face. The man took a step away from Kinky, and then Kinky’s face changed, going from placating to lewd. In the blink of an eye, Kinky reached out and grabbed one of the man’s butt cheeks and gave it a healthy squeeze. The side of the man’s face turned deep red.
    The next action occurred so fast that it was hard to make out. The fat man stiffened for a moment, lunged out of the frame, and then popped back in, one arm swinging in an arc toward Kinky. In a glint of gold, then a splatter of red, Kinky collapsed to the floor like a giant sack of potatoes. The man froze and stared a moment at the oversized, bronzed bingo dauber. He tossed the bloodied dauber to the ground, turned, and bolted out of the room. We watched the tape to the end, but there was nothing else either incriminating or indecent on it.
    Coop pushed the stop button and we sat in stunned silence.
    I finally croaked, “Holy crap.” We had just witnessed the murder of another human being. I could hardly believe it. The man was a pig, but still. In a moment, in a flash, life could end. Just like that. I swallowed hard.
    “Sweet Jesus, indeed. That man is a murderer.” Eddy shuddered. “That has to be Pudge. Sweeeeeeeet Jesus,” she repeated in a whisper.
    “What the hell is going on?” I asked quietly. This was way out of our league. Oh hell, it was out of our league the moment Coop pulled me into the garage and told me what was going on. We needed

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