Snapper, unable to hold back. ‘I ought to feed you legfirst to the bloody piano! Take a diamond-drill to your windpipe!’
‘So should I,’ said Leap. ‘How do you like them apples?’
‘I find them strangely familiar,’ I said. ‘Like a stainless steel doughnut.’
‘Is that the best your beestung brain can come up with?’ yelled Snapper. ‘Why didn’t you drown him at the pump, brother?’
‘Changelings,’ the Verger bellowed. ‘Spooky as hell. The boy there, drooping around like a Shelleyan orphan. Beckoned me into the hothouse. Showed me a skull. I was out of there as fast as my arms and legs could take me.’
‘Changelings?’ said Adrienne, standing. ‘Then we’re not your responsibility. Come on, laughing boy, we don’t belong here.’
‘Time enough to grin when you’re coffin-bound and skinless!’ shrieked the Verger at our retreating backs. ‘Lust is flesh-deep! You can’t cheat death - it must be done fair and square!’
‘We’re all god’s children,’ whispered Adrienne, nudging me with a hip. ‘Whether he likes it or not.’
POD
I ascended the narrow stairwell to the tower where the Verger lurked in a kind of chaotic apothecary. He was writing at a rolltop desk and facing away from me when I entered with a doorcreak. Lambent sunlight played through dust and glass vessels.
‘Hello Verger. Weather’s brightened up.’
‘I’ll be the judge of that, laughing boy,’ he said without taking his eyes from his work
I scuffed aimlessly.
‘What are you doing?’
‘Nothing of interest to the lustful.’
I pottered around the room, trailing a finger through shelfdust and scrutinising murky jars. ‘I say, Verger - is this a dove you’ve preserved?’
The Verger turned, raised his eyebrows and stood enraged, storming over. ‘No business of yours, hell-child,’ he thundered, yanking at the jar with such force that it flew over his shoulder and exploded against a wall.
The Verger roared me down the stairs to Father’s study. ‘Bottomless arrogance,’ he told him. ‘Uncontrollable urges. Smirking evil.’
‘In English, Verger.’
‘Well there was I in the precious sanctuary of the tower when laughing boy here pranced in and made a remark. A remark which left nothing to the imagination.’
‘Listen to me, Verger,’ I said, ‘the amount of bullshit I take from you is unbelievable. You and your bland assumptions can balk awkwardly into the lake. If there’s one thing I deplore, Father, it’s a bigot on the high ground.’
‘Have you two fellows ever heard of conciliation?’
The Verger and me began to laugh simultaneously, and halted glowering at eachother.
‘My point is this,’ Father stated mildly. ‘Man stands alone in sickness unto death. You could save alot of time, emotion and money by cultivating your own amusement - tying snakes in a knot, pronging your nose with a hoof spike and so on.’
All this was completely alien to the Verger, who regarded Father with tortured amazement. ‘Did I hear correctly?’
Father gave me a helpless look. ‘I’ve done what I can.’
‘This beggars belief,’ said the Verger in astonishment. ‘Your son rides roughshod over my life and you sit there like a barrel.’
‘What precisely did he do, Verger? Answer without lying if you can.’
‘He picked up a jar,’ stated the Verger with an effort of self-control, ‘and threw it.’
‘Threw it?’
‘Further than was either pleasant or necessary.’
‘Father, do you think I’ve no more pressing business than to play volleyball with this moron’s jars of snot?’
‘Is this true, Verger?’
‘Why should I put snot of all things in a jar?’
‘Postponement of a more permanent decision?’
‘A reluctance to accept the natural order,’ I suggested. ‘After all, Father, you and I try to escape our snot as fast as we can. This gentleman surrounds himself with the stuff.’
‘The boy’s reasoning is sound, Verger, though I say it with tears
‘So should I,’ said Leap. ‘How do you like them apples?’
‘I find them strangely familiar,’ I said. ‘Like a stainless steel doughnut.’
‘Is that the best your beestung brain can come up with?’ yelled Snapper. ‘Why didn’t you drown him at the pump, brother?’
‘Changelings,’ the Verger bellowed. ‘Spooky as hell. The boy there, drooping around like a Shelleyan orphan. Beckoned me into the hothouse. Showed me a skull. I was out of there as fast as my arms and legs could take me.’
‘Changelings?’ said Adrienne, standing. ‘Then we’re not your responsibility. Come on, laughing boy, we don’t belong here.’
‘Time enough to grin when you’re coffin-bound and skinless!’ shrieked the Verger at our retreating backs. ‘Lust is flesh-deep! You can’t cheat death - it must be done fair and square!’
‘We’re all god’s children,’ whispered Adrienne, nudging me with a hip. ‘Whether he likes it or not.’
POD
I ascended the narrow stairwell to the tower where the Verger lurked in a kind of chaotic apothecary. He was writing at a rolltop desk and facing away from me when I entered with a doorcreak. Lambent sunlight played through dust and glass vessels.
‘Hello Verger. Weather’s brightened up.’
‘I’ll be the judge of that, laughing boy,’ he said without taking his eyes from his work
I scuffed aimlessly.
‘What are you doing?’
‘Nothing of interest to the lustful.’
I pottered around the room, trailing a finger through shelfdust and scrutinising murky jars. ‘I say, Verger - is this a dove you’ve preserved?’
The Verger turned, raised his eyebrows and stood enraged, storming over. ‘No business of yours, hell-child,’ he thundered, yanking at the jar with such force that it flew over his shoulder and exploded against a wall.
The Verger roared me down the stairs to Father’s study. ‘Bottomless arrogance,’ he told him. ‘Uncontrollable urges. Smirking evil.’
‘In English, Verger.’
‘Well there was I in the precious sanctuary of the tower when laughing boy here pranced in and made a remark. A remark which left nothing to the imagination.’
‘Listen to me, Verger,’ I said, ‘the amount of bullshit I take from you is unbelievable. You and your bland assumptions can balk awkwardly into the lake. If there’s one thing I deplore, Father, it’s a bigot on the high ground.’
‘Have you two fellows ever heard of conciliation?’
The Verger and me began to laugh simultaneously, and halted glowering at eachother.
‘My point is this,’ Father stated mildly. ‘Man stands alone in sickness unto death. You could save alot of time, emotion and money by cultivating your own amusement - tying snakes in a knot, pronging your nose with a hoof spike and so on.’
All this was completely alien to the Verger, who regarded Father with tortured amazement. ‘Did I hear correctly?’
Father gave me a helpless look. ‘I’ve done what I can.’
‘This beggars belief,’ said the Verger in astonishment. ‘Your son rides roughshod over my life and you sit there like a barrel.’
‘What precisely did he do, Verger? Answer without lying if you can.’
‘He picked up a jar,’ stated the Verger with an effort of self-control, ‘and threw it.’
‘Threw it?’
‘Further than was either pleasant or necessary.’
‘Father, do you think I’ve no more pressing business than to play volleyball with this moron’s jars of snot?’
‘Is this true, Verger?’
‘Why should I put snot of all things in a jar?’
‘Postponement of a more permanent decision?’
‘A reluctance to accept the natural order,’ I suggested. ‘After all, Father, you and I try to escape our snot as fast as we can. This gentleman surrounds himself with the stuff.’
‘The boy’s reasoning is sound, Verger, though I say it with tears
Similar Books
