second time.”
“No offense, but you’re kind of the reason I came here. Much like the
last time I ran into you. I wanted to forget the cancer for a couple of hours.”
Before he could give me some depressing speech again, I clarified. “I know
it’ll still be there, but I just wanted to pretend for a little while before I
go back to reality.”
He nodded. “No offense taken. I get it. If anyone gets it, I do.”
He signaled the bartender and ordered another round for both of us.
“I thought you understood that I wasn’t staying.”
“I understood that you wanted to get away from cancer.” He stuck out
his hand and said, “Hi, I’m Brad.” He forced a bit of a smile.
I rolled my eyes and shook his hand. I’d lost my fight, and if I were
being truly honest with myself, a part of me was enjoying talking or arguing
with the good doctor.
“Hi, I’m Steph.”
“It’s nice to meet you Steph.” He paused and I could almost see the
wheels turning trying to think of what to say next, but all he came back with
was, “Uh, is that short for Stephanie?”
I burst out laughing. “Wow, maybe we should talk about cancer if that’s
your witty repartee.”
“I’ve never been one for small talk.”
“You don’t say?”
He shrugged and took a sip of the fresh cocktail in front of him.
“Actually, neither am I.” I took a sip, and then, it must have been the
alcohol talking. “In fact, as messed up as some of this conversation has been,
I think I’ve talked more here with you than I ever have with any man in a bar.”
“Uh, thank you?”
“My point exactly.”
He laughed and then raised his glass. “To small talk.” I repeated it
and we clinked glasses. Then there was silence.
“I think this is the part where we ask each other what we do for a living
or talk about sports or…”
His expression changed and became somber. He shook his head and took a
moment, like he was warring with himself before he spoke. “How was your mom
feeling after today’s session?”
“What? I thought you understood. I thought we just agreed… I don’t want
to talk about that.” I huffed.
“I’m sorry. I just can’t sit here and pretend.”
“Well, you didn’t try very hard.” I sounded like a petulant child, but
I didn’t care.
“No, I didn’t.” He said almost apologetically. “I just know I can’t.”
“And I can’t either.” I wasn’t going to delay leaving any longer. He
could pick up my damn tab again. I grabbed my purse, slid off the stool and
once again walked out of the bar because of the good doctor.
As I walked to the bathroom, I chided myself for starting to enjoy
sitting and talking with my mother’s oncologist. Even flirting. I’m not sure
what the hell I expected from him or from me. I should have known better than
to think that people could change just like that, that I could have a nice conversation
with someone who could be such a jerk. Then again, there was that other side of
him. Who knew, maybe that was what Dave thought of me. Two totally different
people.
Lost in thought as I dug through my purse to find my keys I walked
straight into Dr. Rosenberg as I came out of the bathroom.
“Seriously?” I was getting tired of this game. I didn’t know what he
wanted but with everything that was going on, I didn’t have the energy to play.
“I came to apologize.”
I stared up at him and tried to read his expression. He was back to his
soft side, and damn it if I didn’t soften too.
“You don’t need to.” I said softly and started to walk past him, but he
shifted so I couldn’t pass.
“Yes, I do. You told me you were trying to get away from something and
I shoved it right back in your face. I’m sorry. I’m just… I’m just not very
good at bullshit.”
“Yeah, I got that.” I looked down at my shoes as I tried to reconcile
what I was feeling. Maybe I was a glutton for punishment. I knew the man
standing before me could be a colossal asshole, but there
“No offense, but you’re kind of the reason I came here. Much like the
last time I ran into you. I wanted to forget the cancer for a couple of hours.”
Before he could give me some depressing speech again, I clarified. “I know
it’ll still be there, but I just wanted to pretend for a little while before I
go back to reality.”
He nodded. “No offense taken. I get it. If anyone gets it, I do.”
He signaled the bartender and ordered another round for both of us.
“I thought you understood that I wasn’t staying.”
“I understood that you wanted to get away from cancer.” He stuck out
his hand and said, “Hi, I’m Brad.” He forced a bit of a smile.
I rolled my eyes and shook his hand. I’d lost my fight, and if I were
being truly honest with myself, a part of me was enjoying talking or arguing
with the good doctor.
“Hi, I’m Steph.”
“It’s nice to meet you Steph.” He paused and I could almost see the
wheels turning trying to think of what to say next, but all he came back with
was, “Uh, is that short for Stephanie?”
I burst out laughing. “Wow, maybe we should talk about cancer if that’s
your witty repartee.”
“I’ve never been one for small talk.”
“You don’t say?”
He shrugged and took a sip of the fresh cocktail in front of him.
“Actually, neither am I.” I took a sip, and then, it must have been the
alcohol talking. “In fact, as messed up as some of this conversation has been,
I think I’ve talked more here with you than I ever have with any man in a bar.”
“Uh, thank you?”
“My point exactly.”
He laughed and then raised his glass. “To small talk.” I repeated it
and we clinked glasses. Then there was silence.
“I think this is the part where we ask each other what we do for a living
or talk about sports or…”
His expression changed and became somber. He shook his head and took a
moment, like he was warring with himself before he spoke. “How was your mom
feeling after today’s session?”
“What? I thought you understood. I thought we just agreed… I don’t want
to talk about that.” I huffed.
“I’m sorry. I just can’t sit here and pretend.”
“Well, you didn’t try very hard.” I sounded like a petulant child, but
I didn’t care.
“No, I didn’t.” He said almost apologetically. “I just know I can’t.”
“And I can’t either.” I wasn’t going to delay leaving any longer. He
could pick up my damn tab again. I grabbed my purse, slid off the stool and
once again walked out of the bar because of the good doctor.
As I walked to the bathroom, I chided myself for starting to enjoy
sitting and talking with my mother’s oncologist. Even flirting. I’m not sure
what the hell I expected from him or from me. I should have known better than
to think that people could change just like that, that I could have a nice conversation
with someone who could be such a jerk. Then again, there was that other side of
him. Who knew, maybe that was what Dave thought of me. Two totally different
people.
Lost in thought as I dug through my purse to find my keys I walked
straight into Dr. Rosenberg as I came out of the bathroom.
“Seriously?” I was getting tired of this game. I didn’t know what he
wanted but with everything that was going on, I didn’t have the energy to play.
“I came to apologize.”
I stared up at him and tried to read his expression. He was back to his
soft side, and damn it if I didn’t soften too.
“You don’t need to.” I said softly and started to walk past him, but he
shifted so I couldn’t pass.
“Yes, I do. You told me you were trying to get away from something and
I shoved it right back in your face. I’m sorry. I’m just… I’m just not very
good at bullshit.”
“Yeah, I got that.” I looked down at my shoes as I tried to reconcile
what I was feeling. Maybe I was a glutton for punishment. I knew the man
standing before me could be a colossal asshole, but there
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