Read Online Besotted by Georgia le Carre - Free Book Online

around me, over me. I nod. I smile. I say thank you and I find myself drinking more than normal. Stop, right now, I tell myself.
    ‘Have you been to the opera?’ Marcus asks me. His voice is smooth.
    I suddenly remember the way I was that night, and flushing bright red with embarrassment and confusion, look to Blake.
    ‘Yes, we went to see L’incoronazione de Poppea in Venice,’ Blake cuts in smoothly.
    Marcus nods approvingly. ‘The only place to experience Monteverdi.’ He turns to me. ‘Was that your first time?’
    ‘Yes,’ I mumble.
    ‘Did you enjoy it?’
    The memory makes me blush. I turn my head towards Blake, and my eyes are caught by his. There is hunger in his.
    Marcus coughs delicately. I tear my eyes away. ‘Yes, very much,’ I say huskily.
    ‘Freya, my wife, and I love the opera. We were at the Met for Rossini’s La Cenerentola last week.’
    Blake glances at me. ‘Cinderella,’ he says by way of explanation.
    I nod gratefully.
    ‘I’m afraid it was a grotesque, painfully anti-musical burlesque, only intermittently redeemed by virtuoso vocalism by the central waif.’
    Marcus sips at his Latour.
    I bite my lip. Suddenly I feel ignorant, uncultured and inferior. I realize that Blake has been careful never to let me feel less educated than he is. The truth is his world is totally different from mine. I remember Victoria telling me that no matter what I wear or do they will smell me out. In their eyes I will never be good enough. Will I ever be able to wear this mask of apparent reticence and nonchalance that Marcus wears with such ease? Will I ever possess this studied carelessness that hides all that is real about a person? Marcus is still talking. Surreptitiously I sneak a look at Blake. He is buttering his roll and nodding. Will Blake be ashamed of me one day?
    ‘And what about you, Lana?’
    Shit. I wasn’t listening. ‘Um… Please excuse me. I have to go to the…loo.’
    The moment I say that word, I actually feel light-headed. I remember that it was that beast, Rupert Lothian, who taught me it. His sneering words come back to me, ‘This lot call it the loo.’ I stand up and both men get to their feet. For a moment I look at them confused, and then I realize, of course, it is their way, an exaggerated politeness in the presence of a lady. I nod and walk towards the Ladies.
    There is no one in there, and I lean against one of the walls, and close my eyes. Why am I so affected by Marcus? Why have I allowed myself to become such a mess of shattered nerves? Is it because we met in my moment of great fear and confusion that I have allowed him to grow into such a monster in my mind? I go to the basin, wash my hands and look at my own reflection.
    ‘You have nothing to fear from him,’ I tell myself. Then I take my mobile out and call Billie.
    ‘How’s it going?’ she asks.
    ‘Er… I’m not sure.’
    ‘It’s a yes or no with reptiles.’
    ‘It’s a no.’
    ‘Hmmnnn… Your son is giving trouble.’
    ‘What kind of trouble?’
    ‘He doesn’t want to sleep. He thinks he should be allowed to climb through the window, on to the balcony, and probably over it.’
    ‘It’s not one of his best ideas.’
    ‘I’ll say, but he is surprisingly fast for such a little thing.’
    ‘Tie him up or something. I’ll be there soon.’
    ‘Lana. Reptiles are creatures of instinct and repetition. A mammal can out-think them any day.’
    ‘Doesn’t feel like it right now.’
    ‘In that case give him a black eye. That always works.’
    ‘Thanks for the advice. I’ll be sure to bear it in mind.’
    ‘You’re welcome.’
    ‘See you soon.’
    ‘Use all your strength.’
    I end the call, reapply lip gloss, and walk back to the table. Again both men stand while I seat myself. A brand new napkin has been put beside my plate. I open it and place it on my lap.
    ‘I was just saying to Blake that both of you should come to Victoria’s birthday party.’
    My eyes widen. I feel the blood