of girl.”
I got off his lap and sat on the other end of the couch. “Jeb, I am not the type of girl you would want to get involved with.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Listen, you already know I was homeless. My parents kicked me out when I was seventeen. I am a no body.”
He took my hand. “Let me get to know you.”
“What if you hate what you find out? I am damaged, a destroyed soul.”
He held his head down. “Toria, there is something about you. I can’t put my finger on it just yet, but I will. You may say that you are damaged or even destroyed, but damn girl, you are beautiful. You are beautifully destroyed .”
I blushed. “I have demons, stuff I can’t tell you right now. But promise me you won’t give up on me. And don’t push me. I have a problem, and it’s a problem that could kill me. But I’m not ready to move on from it right now. Just don’t push me, please. I will deal with it in my own time. Promise me.”
Chapter Fifteen
Jeb
Hearing Toria talk about her past and the ‘problem’ she had told me that what Sean said was true, at least a little bit. The problem she mentioned was likely that she was addicted to drugs of some kind. I wanted to know more, but I didn’t want to push her. It was the one thing she asked of me, and I was determined to give her that for the time being. I wanted to save her from herself, but I knew it wasn’t the right time. Forcing her into getting help would do nothing more than push her away, and I couldn’t fathom losing her now that I had finally found her. How can I save her from her own addiction when she doesn’t even want to save herself? I thought as she looked in my eyes, expectantly. I couldn’t just sit back and watch her kill herself when I was absolutely falling in love with her. It was crazy, because we had just met, but it was impossible to deny my heart’s desire. I couldn’t lose her. But if I pushed her too hard, I could lose her, and if I didn’t I could also lose her. It was a lose-lose situation. What was I going to do?
“Toria.” I placed my hand on her cheek, and she placed her hand on top of mine. “I just don’t want to lose you.”
“I’m poison. I will destroy you.”
“I guess I will just have to take that chance.”
Tears poured from her eyes. “One day I will get that help, but please understand it will be on my time.”
I pulled her back onto my lap and I looked into her eyes. Wiping the tears from her eyes, the look in her eyes made my heart swell. If I didn’t leave soon, I would want to make love to her. To be honest, I already did want to make love to her. But I knew she was not ready for that.
She curled up in my lap, and before I knew it, Vanessa was walking in the door. We must have fallen asleep. I looked around, but Toria was nowhere to be found.
“Where’s Toria, Jeb?”
“She was just here.” I got up and searched the house, but I couldn’t find her. I started to panic. Where was she?
“She’s not here. Jeb, what if she is going to buy more pills?”
“So you know what she is on? Is she smoking crack or doing coke? My friend told me she was into that. Tell me, Vanessa.”
She put her hands up. “Down, boy. No, she is not using crack or cocaine. She is addicted to prescription pills. I think Adderall and Oxy . But she told me she hadn’t taken any in a while.”
“I think she is lying to you. We need to find her.”
She put her hand on my arm. “We will find her. Now, come on. We will go ask Mitch where she would go.”
I got into her car and she drove to this Mitch person’s house. Who was he? “Who is Mitch?”
“Oh. When she was living on the streets, he was like a father to her. He would get the drugs for her.”
“Do you think it’s wise to take me to the guy who was supplying the drugs to her?”
She sighed. “He’s been clean for a week now. He is going through really bad withdrawals. He is my brother’s lover, and he has been
I got off his lap and sat on the other end of the couch. “Jeb, I am not the type of girl you would want to get involved with.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Listen, you already know I was homeless. My parents kicked me out when I was seventeen. I am a no body.”
He took my hand. “Let me get to know you.”
“What if you hate what you find out? I am damaged, a destroyed soul.”
He held his head down. “Toria, there is something about you. I can’t put my finger on it just yet, but I will. You may say that you are damaged or even destroyed, but damn girl, you are beautiful. You are beautifully destroyed .”
I blushed. “I have demons, stuff I can’t tell you right now. But promise me you won’t give up on me. And don’t push me. I have a problem, and it’s a problem that could kill me. But I’m not ready to move on from it right now. Just don’t push me, please. I will deal with it in my own time. Promise me.”
Chapter Fifteen
Jeb
Hearing Toria talk about her past and the ‘problem’ she had told me that what Sean said was true, at least a little bit. The problem she mentioned was likely that she was addicted to drugs of some kind. I wanted to know more, but I didn’t want to push her. It was the one thing she asked of me, and I was determined to give her that for the time being. I wanted to save her from herself, but I knew it wasn’t the right time. Forcing her into getting help would do nothing more than push her away, and I couldn’t fathom losing her now that I had finally found her. How can I save her from her own addiction when she doesn’t even want to save herself? I thought as she looked in my eyes, expectantly. I couldn’t just sit back and watch her kill herself when I was absolutely falling in love with her. It was crazy, because we had just met, but it was impossible to deny my heart’s desire. I couldn’t lose her. But if I pushed her too hard, I could lose her, and if I didn’t I could also lose her. It was a lose-lose situation. What was I going to do?
“Toria.” I placed my hand on her cheek, and she placed her hand on top of mine. “I just don’t want to lose you.”
“I’m poison. I will destroy you.”
“I guess I will just have to take that chance.”
Tears poured from her eyes. “One day I will get that help, but please understand it will be on my time.”
I pulled her back onto my lap and I looked into her eyes. Wiping the tears from her eyes, the look in her eyes made my heart swell. If I didn’t leave soon, I would want to make love to her. To be honest, I already did want to make love to her. But I knew she was not ready for that.
She curled up in my lap, and before I knew it, Vanessa was walking in the door. We must have fallen asleep. I looked around, but Toria was nowhere to be found.
“Where’s Toria, Jeb?”
“She was just here.” I got up and searched the house, but I couldn’t find her. I started to panic. Where was she?
“She’s not here. Jeb, what if she is going to buy more pills?”
“So you know what she is on? Is she smoking crack or doing coke? My friend told me she was into that. Tell me, Vanessa.”
She put her hands up. “Down, boy. No, she is not using crack or cocaine. She is addicted to prescription pills. I think Adderall and Oxy . But she told me she hadn’t taken any in a while.”
“I think she is lying to you. We need to find her.”
She put her hand on my arm. “We will find her. Now, come on. We will go ask Mitch where she would go.”
I got into her car and she drove to this Mitch person’s house. Who was he? “Who is Mitch?”
“Oh. When she was living on the streets, he was like a father to her. He would get the drugs for her.”
“Do you think it’s wise to take me to the guy who was supplying the drugs to her?”
She sighed. “He’s been clean for a week now. He is going through really bad withdrawals. He is my brother’s lover, and he has been
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