wrinkle in her uniform. “You want to tell me what’s going on?”
Emily’s jaw clenched and her eyes narrowed. “Why should I bother to tell you anything? I can see you already made up your mind, and you’re siding with him.”
“I’m not siding with anyone. I heard his side of the story this morning. Now, I want to hear yours. Have you skipped school?”
“Of course I skipped school. I hate it there! You’re the one who dragged us to Pinewood Springs. You made me give up my friends and our home. When dad was around, things were so much better, but since you took over, everything has gone to shit. I hate it here. I hate my life. I hate you!” Emily jumped up from the couch, ran up the stairs, and slammed her bedroom door.
Belle dashed after her, stopping in front of her door. She knocked. “Open the door, Emily.”
“Just leave me the fuck alone.”
“Emily, I told you to open the door. Now.” Belle stood by the door and heard her daughter sobbing. Her heart broke, but anger also flowed within her. If only she could take Emily in her arms as she used to when she was a young girl and tell her that everything would be all right. It seemed so simple back then: a hug, her fingers through her daughter’s hair, and all was good. How had life changed so drastically? “Emily, I’m still waiting for you to open the door.”
Something large crashed against the door. “I told you to leave me the fuck alone. If you don’t, then I’m breaking everything in the room.”
Before Belle answered, she heard whimpering coming from Ethan’s room. She walked over to his door and knocked on it. There was no answer. Trying the knob, she turned it and entered. Ethan, sitting at the head of his bed, curled up in a ball, shook like a leaf. In that instant, her heart shattered into a million pieces. She dashed over to him and pulled him into her arms. His small arms hugged her waist, and he nestled his head against her chest. As she stroked his head, she whispered, “Shh… It’s going to be okay. Don’t worry about anything; I’ll always be here for you. Your sister and I are just going through a rough patch right now, but it has nothing to do with you. We both love you. It’s all okay.”
Ethan clung to her as she ran her fingers through his hair, rocking back and forth until he fell asleep. She placed him on his pillow and covered him with his sheets and comforter, happy that he had calmed down and everything was all right with him again.
It’s so unfair to put Ethan through all this stress. I don’t know how to handle Emily. Maybe I can’t control her. Maybe it’s too late for us. I just know I can’t subject Ethan to this anymore. A pang of guilt stabbed her as she realized that, for the past year, it had all been about Emily—helping, placating, and understanding her—while Ethan seemed unscathed, but that night told her a different story. She had to think of Ethan and not only Emily. Not wanting to leave him, she sat in the rocking chair and watched her son sleep.
As the minutes turned into hours, Belle wrestled with the reality that she may lose her daughter to foster care. Holly’s offer of Emily living with her and Darren for the rest of the school year started sounding like a good alternative. The problem was she didn’t know how Emily would respond to it. What if she thought Belle was trying to get rid of her, discard her like a piece of trash? Would she ever understand her mother’s actions, or would she hate her for the rest of her life? Belle wasn’t sure what she was going to do, but she knew she would never give her daughter up to an impersonal system that treated children like collateral. If Emily couldn’t live with her, then she’d live with Holly—someone she knew and cared about.
Belle bent over and grabbed the afghan on top of the trunk at the foot of Ethan’s bad, wrapping it around her shoulders. She leaned her head against the rocking chair and closed her eyes, welcoming the
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