Read Online Baby Be Mine by Paige Toon - Free Book Online Page A

silently beg him to keep quiet, to not say anything to Christian when he gets back from the airport, and then I face ahead and try to still my beating heart.

 
  Chapter 9  
    Text me when you land
    Oh my God, what does that mean? I’ve wanted to call Christian during every minute of the two-and-a-half-hour flight to Barcelona, but when I’m finally allowed to switch my phone back on, this is the message from him that greets me.
    I grip my phone with white knuckles and call him. It rings and rings before reverting to voicemail.
    Text me when you land . . .
    Why? Has Johnny told him that he thinks Barney is his? I try him again as I’m waiting for my suitcase and again when I reach our car in the parking lot. I can’t think straight, and I need to concentrate on driving this journey that I’m supposed to be doing again in just two days’ time for Bess’s birthday. That trip no longer feels appropriate. I must speak to her.
    Christian rings me himself when I’ve exited the motorway and have started winding my way through the mountains towards Cucugnan. I pull over and take the call, my voice shaking as I answer.
    ‘Hello?’
    ‘Five missed calls!’ he practically shouts. I couldn’t resist pressing redial another two times on the motorway. ‘Are you alright?’ he adds, and, thank God, he sounds normal.
    ‘I’m fine,’ I reply as some of the tension evaporates. ‘But you wanted me to call you when I landed and I wasn’t sure why.’
    ‘I said “text”, you divvy. I just wanted to check you got there safely.’
    ‘Oh!’
    Dur . . . He wouldn’t ask me to merely text if it were something serious. I did say I couldn’t think straight.
    ‘Are you home yet?’ he asks.
    ‘No, not yet. How are you?’ I ask. ‘Why didn’t you answer your phone?’
    ‘I forgot to take it with me. Dad wanted me to go with him to see his solicitor. I’ve only just seen your missed calls.’
    ‘Aah.’ I so want to ask about Johnny, but I keep my focus on Christian. ‘How did the meeting go?’
    ‘Oh . . .’ He sounds sad. ‘It was just a formality, but it’s still not easy.’
    ‘Of course not,’ I say sympathetically. ‘I wish I could have gone with you.’
    ‘I miss you,’ he replies and I wish I could hug him down the phone.
    ‘I miss you, too,’ I say softly. I try to hang onto this warm, compassionate feeling, but my dark side drags my thoughts, kicking and screaming, towards Johnny. Finally I give in. ‘Is Johnny still with you?’
    ‘No,’ Christian replies. ‘That was a bit weird. He left when I took you to the airport.’
    I swallow. ‘Did he?’
    ‘Yeah.’ He humphs. ‘I was only gone half an hour, I thought he’d at least hang around to say goodbye.’
    Oh, God. He knows. He knows.
    ‘How odd,’ I manage to say.
    ‘You know what he’s like.’
    ‘Mmm. Well, give your dad and Joel my love.’
    ‘I will do. You should get back on the road,’ he adds. ‘Call me tonight?’
    ‘Yes, will do.’
    ‘Love you.’
    ‘I love you, too.’
    ‘Bye.’
    I stare out through the front window.
    Johnny left suddenly because he knows Barney is his. I wonder if I can convince him he’s wrong.
    It occurs to me that Johnny might convince himself of that. He doesn’t want a child, for goodness’ sake. Why would he want to get involved when he’s so clearly not cut out for fatherhood? Surely he wouldn’t do that to Christian, either.
    I have a sudden compulsive urge to hurt myself, to punish myself for what I’ve done. I take a few deep breaths and try to think about my son laughing, and even though that image is – and probably always will be – tainted by the knowledge of this overbearing secret that is no longer a secret, it does calm me slightly. I put the car into drive, indicate and pull away from the kerb.
    Barney is with my parents on the terrace when I turn into the driveway. It looks like they’ve been outside under the shade of the umbrella waiting for me. Barney starts to squeak