Read Online Average American Male by Chad Kultgen - Free Book Online
Authors: Chad Kultgen
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but he’s still my boyfriend.”
Holy shit. I want to tell her that I have a girlfriend, that it doesn’t matter, that they don’t have to know. Instead I say, “Oh . . .”
She kisses me on the cheek and says, “Seriously, thanks, I had a really good time and you’re a really nice guy.”
She turns to leave and I say, “Why did you go out with me in the first place?”
“I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
And she leaves. As she walks out the door, I wish I would have fucked her or at least felt one of her tits. I lie down on my couch and smell the spot she was sitting on. I jerk off to the thought of her sucking my cock. I shoot my load into a napkin that’s been on my coffee table for a few days. I stare at the ceiling wondering if I could’ve fucked her if I had tried a little harder. I wonder if she’ll fuck her boyfriend tonight. I wonder if he’ll fuck her doggie style. I wonder if she’ll think about me while he does.
I experience a surprising moment of genuine sadness as I realize that I might never see Alyna again, when my cell phone vibrates again and it’s Casey calling from her parents’ house in Nebraska. She asks me what I did tonight but doesn’t let me answer before she tells me the good news that her parents were so excited when she announced our engagement that they’re coming out to visit their future son-in-law in a few weeks.
She’s still talking about something when I put the phone next to my head and fall asleep.
chapter fifteen
The Morning After
I wake up, take a shower, and realize I’m supposed to be eating lunch with my gay buddy Carlos in thirty minutes.
Forty-five minutes later, I walk into the Beverly Center California Pizza Kitchen to see Carlos sitting by himself and pissed off.
He says, “Where the fuck have you been, you little asshole?”
“I was tired. I forgot.”
“You fucking forgot. You ungrateful piece of shit.”
“Sorry.”
“Well, now you have to buy my lunch because you’re a fucker.”
“Sure.”
We get seated and look at the menus for no reason.
“Hey, see those two guys over there?” He looks in the direction of two guys in their late thirties sitting at a small table in the back. One of them is wearing a shirt with pink letters that read naughty boy.
I say, “Yeah.”
“The one with the brown hair has the smallest dick I’ve ever sucked. So what in the hell have you been up to besides making me wait to eat lunch when I’m fucking starving?”
“I had that date last night.”
“Oh, right, that bitch you met in the video game store. And Casey doesn’t know a thing?”
“Right.”
“Well, how did it go? Did you at least get blown?”
“I thought it went pretty well until the end. She invited herself back to my house—”
“Wow, so you definitely got blown. You probably fucked her.”
“I didn’t get blown or fuck her. She kissed me and then said she had a boyfriend and had to leave.”
“That little bitch. But seriously, that doesn’t sound too bad. At least all she did was kiss you and at least all she had was a fucking boyfriend.
I’ve been on my knees with cum dribbling out of my ass and down my chin and had some son of a bitch tell me he was married with kids. Try that one on for size.”
“I just don’t get why she even went out with me in the first place.”
“Who the fuck knows? Women can be complete cunts. At least with guys you know they always go out with you to fuck you, plain and simple. That’s why you went out with her, right?”
“Yeah. For the most part.”
“What other part is there?”
“I don’t know. None, I guess.”
“Listen. It’s better it ended up this way. I mean, Casey would’ve eventually found out about this thing if it had gone on for very long.”
“I know.”
“So count your blessings. You got to go on a date with a hot piece of ass and you still get to keep your girlfriend.”
I almost wish I had answered the phone when Casey called the first time. I almost
Holy shit. I want to tell her that I have a girlfriend, that it doesn’t matter, that they don’t have to know. Instead I say, “Oh . . .”
She kisses me on the cheek and says, “Seriously, thanks, I had a really good time and you’re a really nice guy.”
She turns to leave and I say, “Why did you go out with me in the first place?”
“I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
And she leaves. As she walks out the door, I wish I would have fucked her or at least felt one of her tits. I lie down on my couch and smell the spot she was sitting on. I jerk off to the thought of her sucking my cock. I shoot my load into a napkin that’s been on my coffee table for a few days. I stare at the ceiling wondering if I could’ve fucked her if I had tried a little harder. I wonder if she’ll fuck her boyfriend tonight. I wonder if he’ll fuck her doggie style. I wonder if she’ll think about me while he does.
I experience a surprising moment of genuine sadness as I realize that I might never see Alyna again, when my cell phone vibrates again and it’s Casey calling from her parents’ house in Nebraska. She asks me what I did tonight but doesn’t let me answer before she tells me the good news that her parents were so excited when she announced our engagement that they’re coming out to visit their future son-in-law in a few weeks.
She’s still talking about something when I put the phone next to my head and fall asleep.
chapter fifteen
The Morning After
I wake up, take a shower, and realize I’m supposed to be eating lunch with my gay buddy Carlos in thirty minutes.
Forty-five minutes later, I walk into the Beverly Center California Pizza Kitchen to see Carlos sitting by himself and pissed off.
He says, “Where the fuck have you been, you little asshole?”
“I was tired. I forgot.”
“You fucking forgot. You ungrateful piece of shit.”
“Sorry.”
“Well, now you have to buy my lunch because you’re a fucker.”
“Sure.”
We get seated and look at the menus for no reason.
“Hey, see those two guys over there?” He looks in the direction of two guys in their late thirties sitting at a small table in the back. One of them is wearing a shirt with pink letters that read naughty boy.
I say, “Yeah.”
“The one with the brown hair has the smallest dick I’ve ever sucked. So what in the hell have you been up to besides making me wait to eat lunch when I’m fucking starving?”
“I had that date last night.”
“Oh, right, that bitch you met in the video game store. And Casey doesn’t know a thing?”
“Right.”
“Well, how did it go? Did you at least get blown?”
“I thought it went pretty well until the end. She invited herself back to my house—”
“Wow, so you definitely got blown. You probably fucked her.”
“I didn’t get blown or fuck her. She kissed me and then said she had a boyfriend and had to leave.”
“That little bitch. But seriously, that doesn’t sound too bad. At least all she did was kiss you and at least all she had was a fucking boyfriend.
I’ve been on my knees with cum dribbling out of my ass and down my chin and had some son of a bitch tell me he was married with kids. Try that one on for size.”
“I just don’t get why she even went out with me in the first place.”
“Who the fuck knows? Women can be complete cunts. At least with guys you know they always go out with you to fuck you, plain and simple. That’s why you went out with her, right?”
“Yeah. For the most part.”
“What other part is there?”
“I don’t know. None, I guess.”
“Listen. It’s better it ended up this way. I mean, Casey would’ve eventually found out about this thing if it had gone on for very long.”
“I know.”
“So count your blessings. You got to go on a date with a hot piece of ass and you still get to keep your girlfriend.”
I almost wish I had answered the phone when Casey called the first time. I almost
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