Read Online Angry Young Spaceman by Jim Munroe - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Jim Munroe
Ads: Link
trade: English. Only a few could afford the expensive English-translators, and most Earthlings were contemptuous of non-English speakers anyway, so the solution most planets gravitated towards was a.... blah blah blah. Allum Allum Allum.
Mr. Zik was staring at me, his tentacles bunching and unbunching. For his sake I delivered the appropriate response.
“Teaching English to your citizens will give your planet a commercial advantage. It’s a good investment.”
Mr. Zik translated, making it two or three sentences long.
Mr. Lok stood, offering a withered tentacle to me to shake. I did. He said something to me.
“You are a very handsomebloy, he said.”
I smiled at Mr. Lok, who fixed those awful eyes on me, and tried to reciprocate. Honestly. “Your... office is very comfortable.”
“Good-bye,” Mr. Lok said.
After we left, Mr. Zik said, “I didn’t tell him what you said ablout the office.”
“That’s OK,” I said, smiling at a person with files that we were passing. “It was pretty meaningless, anyway.”
Mr. Zik looked thoughtful.
“It was unimportant.”
“Oh, I see,” he said. “Ssss-sss-ss.”
We walked out of the school board building and I almost asked him why he’d been nervous, but it felt like I would be implying that he was stupid or cowardly for being so. So we got into his saucer in silence.
Soon the gates of the school came into sight. My stomach leapt, and I was surprised by my own nervousness. The building was white, with glints of windows.
“Is that it?” I asked.
Mr. Zik nodded.
We parked and passed through the gates. There were children around the entrance who moved aside to let us through. They had brooms and bags.
“Zik oewiru, eoit fljnt fadntr he?” one called.
“Kllletnroj fldaj rnui Sam Breen, English oewiru,” Mr. Zik said brusquely.
I looked back at them and smiled. That started everyone talking at once.
“Hello!” someone said.
I looked back and said hello.
This prompted a few squeals and a couple of follow-up hellos. I didn’t respond, since we were almost out of earshot. One of them said something that made Mr. Zik’s head swivel.
He didn’t respond to it, but to me he said, “They are the blad students. They must clean up the ground.”
I looked back at the bad students and they looked like they were already talking about something else. Ahead, a few windows went up and curious heads stuck out, their tentacles sticking out over the windowsill.
Mr. Zik walked smoothly and calmly through the halls. I followed, feeling clumsy with my two-legged gait. The groups of students twined their front tentacles and bowed to him, and some of them even made this polite greeting to me. He said something that sounded friendly without being chummy. Was this the same Mr. Zik who had been shaking with terror twenty minutes ago?
He turned into the staff room and glanced back to make sure I was there. I straightened my tie, yanked on my cuffs, donned a blinding smile, and walked into the room.
five
Hi Lisa,
“Welcome to Plangyo. Are you a criminal?”
So yesterday I’m going about my business. Not doing anything out of the ordinary, except I’m taking a little more time than usual to buy my vegetables since they have physical currency here (5 Beeds = 1 Intergalactic Credit, I feel rich!) and I can’t read the signs and I’ve never seen a double-barrelled cucumber...
No, I’m not complaining. Just explaining why I was holding up the line. I had to put everything on the counter to pull out a handful of beeds and for some reason people thought that was really funny — Octavians don’t often run out of hands, I suppose. I was probably blushing to beat the band (archaic English idiom I’m using to make you feel dumb) and when I did get a handful of their damnable (though admittedly quite lovely) spherical currency out of my pocket two dropped to the ground.
The laughter stopped suddenly at this point and I still don’t
Mr. Zik was staring at me, his tentacles bunching and unbunching. For his sake I delivered the appropriate response.
“Teaching English to your citizens will give your planet a commercial advantage. It’s a good investment.”
Mr. Zik translated, making it two or three sentences long.
Mr. Lok stood, offering a withered tentacle to me to shake. I did. He said something to me.
“You are a very handsomebloy, he said.”
I smiled at Mr. Lok, who fixed those awful eyes on me, and tried to reciprocate. Honestly. “Your... office is very comfortable.”
“Good-bye,” Mr. Lok said.
After we left, Mr. Zik said, “I didn’t tell him what you said ablout the office.”
“That’s OK,” I said, smiling at a person with files that we were passing. “It was pretty meaningless, anyway.”
Mr. Zik looked thoughtful.
“It was unimportant.”
“Oh, I see,” he said. “Ssss-sss-ss.”
We walked out of the school board building and I almost asked him why he’d been nervous, but it felt like I would be implying that he was stupid or cowardly for being so. So we got into his saucer in silence.
Soon the gates of the school came into sight. My stomach leapt, and I was surprised by my own nervousness. The building was white, with glints of windows.
“Is that it?” I asked.
Mr. Zik nodded.
We parked and passed through the gates. There were children around the entrance who moved aside to let us through. They had brooms and bags.
“Zik oewiru, eoit fljnt fadntr he?” one called.
“Kllletnroj fldaj rnui Sam Breen, English oewiru,” Mr. Zik said brusquely.
I looked back at them and smiled. That started everyone talking at once.
“Hello!” someone said.
I looked back and said hello.
This prompted a few squeals and a couple of follow-up hellos. I didn’t respond, since we were almost out of earshot. One of them said something that made Mr. Zik’s head swivel.
He didn’t respond to it, but to me he said, “They are the blad students. They must clean up the ground.”
I looked back at the bad students and they looked like they were already talking about something else. Ahead, a few windows went up and curious heads stuck out, their tentacles sticking out over the windowsill.
Mr. Zik walked smoothly and calmly through the halls. I followed, feeling clumsy with my two-legged gait. The groups of students twined their front tentacles and bowed to him, and some of them even made this polite greeting to me. He said something that sounded friendly without being chummy. Was this the same Mr. Zik who had been shaking with terror twenty minutes ago?
He turned into the staff room and glanced back to make sure I was there. I straightened my tie, yanked on my cuffs, donned a blinding smile, and walked into the room.
five
Hi Lisa,
“Welcome to Plangyo. Are you a criminal?”
So yesterday I’m going about my business. Not doing anything out of the ordinary, except I’m taking a little more time than usual to buy my vegetables since they have physical currency here (5 Beeds = 1 Intergalactic Credit, I feel rich!) and I can’t read the signs and I’ve never seen a double-barrelled cucumber...
No, I’m not complaining. Just explaining why I was holding up the line. I had to put everything on the counter to pull out a handful of beeds and for some reason people thought that was really funny — Octavians don’t often run out of hands, I suppose. I was probably blushing to beat the band (archaic English idiom I’m using to make you feel dumb) and when I did get a handful of their damnable (though admittedly quite lovely) spherical currency out of my pocket two dropped to the ground.
The laughter stopped suddenly at this point and I still don’t
Similar Books
