Read Online All I Want for Christmas Is You by Lisa Mondello - Free Book Online
Authors: Lisa Mondello
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avoiding anything, Kyle," she countered. "I just don't see any point in rehashing something that can't be changed. It's not worth it."
She heard him draw a deep breath. "It's at least worth a try."
Squeezing her eyes shut, she fought the threat of burning tears and desperately tried to keep her breathing even. "You don't understand."
"But I want to," he said softly. The deep timbre of his voice felt like gentle fingers caressing her soul.
She swung around to meet his gaze and found nothing but warmth and compassion. "I upset the apple cart by marring their perfect family image."
He made no move to come closer to her. The distance felt safe. But at the same time, it also felt lonely. So many times she had cried without any arms to hold her. The idea of Kyle's arms wrapped tight around her now seemed comforting, inviting.
He said nothing, but sat straddling a kitchen chair, resting his arms over the back.
She drew in a deep breath for courage, for strength, but could find none. "They had very high expectations for me. So did I."
"Most parents do."
"My parents aren't most parents." She pushed a lock of hair behind her ear and fiddled with its end, twisting it nervously between her thumb and her index finger. "I was going to be an architect."
He nodded his head. "I remember seeing a copy of Architectural Digest in your apartment the other night."
She gave a weak smile. "Well, maybe someday. Anyway, I was the kind of kid who did everything that was expected of me because it was expected. You know, the perfect Honor Society student, the devoted and obedient daughter. I was so predictable. My parents are psychologists, very well respected members of the community."
"Sounds like something to be proud of."
"Yes, it is, until your only daughter suddenly becomes unpredictable and starts dating a boy you don't approve of, someone who is nothing but trouble. Except I didn't see Jimmy as trouble then. I saw him as the Prince Charming who finally noticed the mousy, shy me that none of the other boys noticed."
He gave a lopsided grin. "I doubt that."
"You didn't know me back then. I admit I was taken with the attention Jimmy showered on me. I ignored all the things people told me about how he was no good, that he'd never change." She saw him flinch, and her heart sank. Would he judge her for her past? "But it was all true, only the truth came too late for me."
"I can see how a parent would have a problem with their daughter dating someone who was trouble," he said in a low voice. "But that's no reason to break all ties with your family."
"You don't know the half of it." She bit her bottom lip before going on. "I don't know what they were more upset about, my jeopardizing a promising future by getting pregnant or having everyone in the community watch their pregnant daughter hobble across a stage to collect her High School diploma." Sadly, she always believed it was the latter. How else could it explain her father's reaction when she told him she wanted to keep her baby? How else would it explain the tension that continued to keep them apart now?
That day. That God awful morning she sat waiting in her hospital room, just two days after Kristen was born.
Waiting for her parents to come and take her home. Waiting for the nightmare to finally be over. The nurse came into her room repeatedly and asked her if she wanted anything for the pain. But she just said no. Nothing she could give her would make the pain in her empty arms go away. She wasn't allowed to be in the maternity ward. It was better that way, easier for everyone involved, she was told.
Easier for who? Lauren cried. Certainly not her. But everyone decided it was best to give the baby up for adoption. Lauren would go away to college, just as planned.
When she graduated and became a successful architect, her parents would eventually get over the "scandal" and everything would get
She heard him draw a deep breath. "It's at least worth a try."
Squeezing her eyes shut, she fought the threat of burning tears and desperately tried to keep her breathing even. "You don't understand."
"But I want to," he said softly. The deep timbre of his voice felt like gentle fingers caressing her soul.
She swung around to meet his gaze and found nothing but warmth and compassion. "I upset the apple cart by marring their perfect family image."
He made no move to come closer to her. The distance felt safe. But at the same time, it also felt lonely. So many times she had cried without any arms to hold her. The idea of Kyle's arms wrapped tight around her now seemed comforting, inviting.
He said nothing, but sat straddling a kitchen chair, resting his arms over the back.
She drew in a deep breath for courage, for strength, but could find none. "They had very high expectations for me. So did I."
"Most parents do."
"My parents aren't most parents." She pushed a lock of hair behind her ear and fiddled with its end, twisting it nervously between her thumb and her index finger. "I was going to be an architect."
He nodded his head. "I remember seeing a copy of Architectural Digest in your apartment the other night."
She gave a weak smile. "Well, maybe someday. Anyway, I was the kind of kid who did everything that was expected of me because it was expected. You know, the perfect Honor Society student, the devoted and obedient daughter. I was so predictable. My parents are psychologists, very well respected members of the community."
"Sounds like something to be proud of."
"Yes, it is, until your only daughter suddenly becomes unpredictable and starts dating a boy you don't approve of, someone who is nothing but trouble. Except I didn't see Jimmy as trouble then. I saw him as the Prince Charming who finally noticed the mousy, shy me that none of the other boys noticed."
He gave a lopsided grin. "I doubt that."
"You didn't know me back then. I admit I was taken with the attention Jimmy showered on me. I ignored all the things people told me about how he was no good, that he'd never change." She saw him flinch, and her heart sank. Would he judge her for her past? "But it was all true, only the truth came too late for me."
"I can see how a parent would have a problem with their daughter dating someone who was trouble," he said in a low voice. "But that's no reason to break all ties with your family."
"You don't know the half of it." She bit her bottom lip before going on. "I don't know what they were more upset about, my jeopardizing a promising future by getting pregnant or having everyone in the community watch their pregnant daughter hobble across a stage to collect her High School diploma." Sadly, she always believed it was the latter. How else could it explain her father's reaction when she told him she wanted to keep her baby? How else would it explain the tension that continued to keep them apart now?
That day. That God awful morning she sat waiting in her hospital room, just two days after Kristen was born.
Waiting for her parents to come and take her home. Waiting for the nightmare to finally be over. The nurse came into her room repeatedly and asked her if she wanted anything for the pain. But she just said no. Nothing she could give her would make the pain in her empty arms go away. She wasn't allowed to be in the maternity ward. It was better that way, easier for everyone involved, she was told.
Easier for who? Lauren cried. Certainly not her. But everyone decided it was best to give the baby up for adoption. Lauren would go away to college, just as planned.
When she graduated and became a successful architect, her parents would eventually get over the "scandal" and everything would get
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