Read Online All He Ever Wanted by Anita Shreve - Free Book Online

was pressed hard against me. I would have lifted her skirts and run my hand along her thigh and tucked my fingers into
     her stocking. I would have done all those things, and perhaps she saw this, for she drew herself together in an instant, as
     if she had plunged her wrists into icy water. Of course, I did nothing, but I cannot help wondering what might have happened
     between us had I been bold enough to touch her then.
    I looked at my outstretched hands. To give them occupation, I reached over toward the hat rack and took her cloak from it.
     I held it to her, and she stepped inside, wrapping herself in the wool. Perhaps I let my arms linger around her a moment longer
     than was proper. Her hair had been freshly washed and smelled of castile. She pulled away and put her hood over her hair.
    “We should go,” she said quickly, “before my aunt detains us.”
    There was no need to say anything more, since I was as eager as she to quit that house.
    (What bargains — what bargains — did I force Etna Bliss to make?)
    The storm had increased in its ferocity. Etna held her hood low over her face, and I had to lead her in what I hoped was the
     right direction. It was madness to be outside on such a day, and my thoughts were split between embarrassment for having allowed
     this foolish outing at all, and a kind of exultation that comes with adventure and risk.
    By the time we had arrived at the college and stepped into the hallway of Worms, the fronts of our cloaks were sheeted with
     ice. My mouth had frozen into a grimace, and it was hard to speak properly for those first few seconds. A college servant
     helped us off with our outer garments and even encouraged us to remove our wet boots, which Etna would not do. We went immediately
     into the dining room and stood by the fire, warming ourselves. Etna’s cheeks and nose were crimson from the stinging snow
     — but, my God, how lovely her face was! She could not suppress a smile: we had survived an ordeal. As the warmth rushed back
     into her face and her limbs, so also did the words pour from her lips. I had hardly ever seen her so animated.
    “Once I went ice-skating with my sisters,” she said. “I was very young, no more than six or seven, I think, and while we were
     there, a sudden storm came on, very like this one, actually, and I don’t remember exactly why now, but whoever had been sent
     to watch us was not there; perhaps it was thought that my sister Pippa could look after us. The storm came on so suddenly,
     we could not find our way back, and we were forced to take shelter in a kind of cave, and oh, the thrill of that, of being
     on our own! I remember that Pippa had brought a jug of cocoa wrapped in flannels in a sack. Miriam was too anxious and couldn’t
     drink much, but I did, all at once, and, my dear, I was so sick later! But it remains, it remains…It is a wonderful memory.”
    She was rubbing her hands by the fire. She had large hands, nearly as large as mine.
    “And how were you found?” I asked.
    “There was a search party. It was feared we had slipped through the ice. I don’t know how long we were lost; it can’t have
     been more than an hour or two, which can be a lifetime in a child’s imagination, no? I suppose also in a mother’s. I remember
     that I was so disappointed to be found.”
    She laughed. The hair at the top and the sides of her face was damp and curled against her forehead and cheeks. I glanced
     around the dining room, which was only partially full. There were no other women. Some men who had been watching Etna turned
     reluctantly away when I looked at them; others nodded and smiled knowingly.
    “Oh, it is so wonderful to be warm,” she said. “One hardly appreciates these comforts when they are too easily come by.”
    “We should sit down,” I said, “and have our meal. You must be hungry.”
    “I am,” she said, looking around for the first time. “I’m starved, actually.” (That was another thing about