Absolute Mayhem

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Authors: Monica Mayhem
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before because they didn't want to
deal with Roy as my agent. This film was directed by
the great F. J. 'Freddie' Lincoln, who'd spent eight years
directing for VCA until Larry Flynt took it over, and it
was my first-ever lead role in a major feature film.
    I loved this movie because it was set in the fourteenth
century. I love period pieces, and in this one the
costumes and settings were awesome. The storyline
had my character drink a potion that put me to sleep
for 400 years, and then I awoke in the basement of an
internet voyeur-cam house, with porn stars all over the
place. The best scene was when I snapped out of the
fourteenth-century character and did two guys, Eric
Price and Chris Cannon, and the hottest part of that
threesome was when I was bouncing up and down in
reverse-cowgirl position and giving a hot blow job at
the same time.
    It was about that time that I started dating a guy
from Orange County, California, called Craven Moorehead
(his stage name, obviously). The director Stoney
Curtis had invited Bella and me to a club, and Craven
was there because he was Stoney's production assistant
at the time. We hit it off instantly. He was very sweet,
though it wasn't until he invited me to a barbecue
at Stoney's house in West Hills that I fell for him. We
were alone, waiting for everyone else to show up, and
he started playing my favourite song, Metallica's 'Fade
to Black' from their Ride the Lightning album. I mean,
he was playing it perfectly on guitar, because it was his
favourite song too.
    And then, by sheer chance, Metallica's Garage Days Re-Revisited EP came on the radio! That did it.
The song 'Last Caress/Green Hell', written by Glenn
Danzig, just slays me, and the whole thing ends with
those Iron Maiden riff s (actually, it's Metallica's parody
of Iron Maiden's 'Run to the Hills'). Iron Maiden was
another of my favourite bands when I was growing up.
Juvenile-delinquent headbanger heaven. Craven and
I just connected immediately!
    Bella, however, didn't like Craven and me being
together at all; she knew what a player he was. Everyone
in the industry knew about him, because he was always
hitting on girls. Bella had seen him out with other girls
when we were dating, too, so his reputation as a horndog
was always out there for all to see. I guess I knew,
intuitively, that Bella was right, but I truly hoped he
could change.
    While personally things were tricky, my career was
going from strength to strength, and I was getting
more great roles. In 2002, I starred in Perfect , directed
by Michael Ninn for Private Media Group, which
was described as a ' Matrix -style hardcore blockbuster
packed with high-tech special effects' in Private's 2002
mail-order catalogue.
    I played a robot, since it was a very futuristic movie,
and I had some crazy hair and make-up done by one of
my favourite make-up artists, Lee Garland. I wore a very
sexy white, full-body leotard and did some robot-like
dialogue in a dream-like state with smoke all around,
and then did a scene with Dale DaBone on a steel table.
We had some crazy sex against a green screen while
suspended in the air with harnesses. It was supposed
to look like The Matrix , as I'm leaning back in mid-air,
getting fucked. (It was a lot of fun on the harness and
I would have loved to have done all kinds of tricks!)
    At the end of the shoot, it was very stressful for
the crew and for Dale because Michael had this crazy
idea about how to shoot the pop shot – he lined up
20 cameras in a circle around us and they were all
supposed to go off simultaneously and continuously
while Dale was cumming. It was supposed to look
like slow motion all around, and it resulted in one of
the longest sex scenes I've ever shot. I'm not sure if it
came out the way that Michael had it planned but it was
certainly a very unique way of ending a sex scene. What
a climax!
    Somehow, during this hectic period of my life,
Craven and I found ourselves driving to Las Vegas to get
married. Bella and Craven's

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