Read Online a Coyote's in the House (2004) by Elmore Leonard - Free Book Online

from her was, Uh-oh.
    I told you, Buddy said, didn't I? Now you're caught by the thorns and all that prickly stuff.
    They heard her voice say, How do I get out? Oh, now you want my advice, Buddy said. Turn around and come out the way you went in. He looked at Antwan. What should she do?
    Learn never to go in places like that. You know what her coat's gonna look like she comes out?
    It's why I warned her, Buddy said.
    And you're gonna catch the blame. Antwan grinning at him now. 'Cause you old and wise to the ways of brier patches and such.
    They could hear her moving through the branches snagging her coat, and now she stepped out in the open, poor Miss Betty, covered with burrs and bits of leaves and things, stuck to her topknot to tail.
    You have to get somebody, Antwan said, to bite all those burrs off you, somebody more devoted to you than I am, 'cause they're prickly, cut your mouth up and swell your tongue. I did it one time only, for Ramona.
    She's going home, Buddy said to Antwan. Now. Like he was too disappointed in Miss Betty to say it to her directly.
    You have some things on your floppy ears, Antwan said. I can bite them off without hurting myself. He moved close to her and nipped at the vegetation. Girl, are you in pain or you just feel like a fool?
    Go home. Buddy telling it to her face now. They'll take one look at you and call the Caboose. Or put you in the car and go to the vet's.
    She ain't hurt, Antwan said.
    She was in the woods, Buddy said. They'll want to know if she picked up anything.
    Like what?
    Ticks, parasites.
    You serious? Antwan said. Bite 'em off. Man, I'm in the woods all day long, I'm healthy.
    You're different, Buddy said. You're not anything like us.
    It got Antwan to say, But you think you can join the pack and be like me? Become a coyote?
    He waited, but Buddy didn't say any more about it. He sent Miss Betty on her way home, and now the dog and the coyote went sniffing after the cat.
    Pr e t t y s o o n t h e w i n d brought the tangy scent of coyotes, Antwan believing it must be the Diablos roaming the land. That way, across the slope and into those trees down there. He stretched his legs now and Buddy came bounding after him.
    The coyotes were in a clearing where shafts of sunlight came through the trees: six Howling Diablos in a loose circle, with Lola, back arched in her snowy coat, in the middle.
    The first thing Antwan did was yip Wassup and go around brushing noses, the coyote style of giving high fives.
    They asked Antwan what was up and he told them, Same old same old. Now it was time to come to the point and he kept it simple. He said, This is Buddy, the movie star.
    Understand? Buddy from the Buddy movies. Buddy and the Kidnappers? We saw it every night it was playing at the drive-in. Saves this little dog name of Pedro from the bad guys. This is Buddy, and this is Buddy's cat, Lola. Understand what I'm saying to you? Buddy don't want you messing with his cat.
    He spoke to them this way when there was no time to explain and they'd have to take his word for whatever it was. And they would, they'd say cool, because Antwan was cool and always had a good reason for what he did.
    The dog, the coyote and now the cat continued on toward the canyon where Lola lived. Antwan asked her if she knew the way. Lola seemed to think about it before saying, That way, pointing her precious little face in the wrong direction.
    Antwan said to Buddy, She don't even know where she lives.
    How could I see where I was going, Lola said, with you dragging me?
    They went on and before long Lola was lagging behind. Antwan looked back to tell her, I'll take you by the collar if you want.
    Lola was sitting down now. She said, Just wait. For what?
    She said, You'll be sorry. Acting snippy now.
    I save her, Antwan said, from being what's for dinner and she talks to me like that?
    She's a movie star, Buddy said.
    He walked over to Lola and put his nose in her pug face as she stood up ready to run, but didn't