99 Palms: Horn OK Please

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Authors: Kartik Iyengar
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treasures of Emperor Ashoka. This is a family secret. The original thirteenth Major Rock edict at Kalinga spoke of the secret land called Shamballa and they had pointed to some ancient scriptures written in 99 Palm leaves. Since Emperor Ashoka had destroyed Kalinga, he wanted to make up to the people of Kalinga and so he left them clues about the path, secret maps and hazy details of his legendary treasure, neatly written down in great detail in these 99 Palms scriptures”.
    “So 99 Palms are ancient scriptures? Written in Brahmi script? Where is it? And what about the fourteenth Major Rock edict that was missing and seems to be substituted as well?” quizzed Derek, leaning forward in anticipation.
    “Yes, these are ancient scriptures and my Great Grandfather unearthed them in Kalinga itself, in the year 1869. The original fourteenth Major Rock edict over there actually spoke of the remorse of Emperor Ashoka and was a proclamation about a secret society that he had formed to protect his treasures and dark sciences. It spoke about the ‘Nine Unknown’…” replied Monica, avoiding eye contact with any of us.
    “Monica, your Great Grandfather was a just a bounty hunter. So what’s so wrong about it? He discovered the ancient 99 Palm scriptures. You should be proud of it! Why are you ashamed of it?” Goose asked, taking her hand in his, taking obvious advantage of her vulnerability. She seemed to relent.
    “Here’s the thing, Goose. Since he figured out that these ancient scriptures called 99 Palms was buried under the thirteenth Major Rock edict, he blew it up with gunpowder and dug out the remaining pieces of the rock edict, unearthed an iron chest which contained these 99 Palms. And since the keepers of this treasure in the lost city of Shambala are the Nine Unknown and that was mentioned in the fourteenth rock edict, he blew that up as well. He vandalized a holy site of peace, just to satisfy his greed!”
    “No wonder the Major Rock edicts in Kalinga were so out of whack. So, the real thirteenth and fourteenth and Major Rock edicts were blown up by your Great grandfather and he replaced them with two similar looking Major Rock edicts which the world now knows as the two Major rock edicts of Kalinga? Tthe 15 th and the 16 th ones?” I asked as I tried to figure out what we saw in Kalinga, when our guide had educated us about the Rock Edicts. It all seemed to make sense now.
    “Yes, that’s right. He got hold of some greedy, unscrupulous sculptors in Kalinga, paid them and got two new Major Rock edicts forged and placed at the original site. So what the world knows as the truth today at Kalinga is actually the biggest lie forged by my family”, replied Monica. Her tone seemed as though she had actually done it herself.
    “OK, so we got the story why you wish to help us. Your Great Grandfather was sure an awesome bounty hunter to have discovered the 99 Palms, but I must say that he’s the world’s lousiest archeologist who didn’t have the sense to copy the two edicts from elsewhere and plant them in Kalinga so even the Nine Unknown wouldn’t even have a clue!” guffawed Hound, in splits, obviously very pleased with himself for lightening up the atmosphere as Monica smiled. Goose glared at Hound for being insensitive.
    “I agree with you, Hound, it is indeed shameful. So now you know why I want you to possess the 99 Palms and be fully aware of the Nine Unknown and their secrets? Just do the charity and I’ll atone for the sins of that old, greedy bandicoot”, said Monica, finally smiling and cheerful.
    “OK, so we have one mystery solved. Now, where are those 99 Palms? Do you have it?” Derek asked impatiently.
    She opened her handbag and took out a beautiful jewel box that would comfortably hold and chill ten cans of Redbull. The box had a copper hatch and beautiful carvings on it. She opened it carefully, and opened the white, silk cloth that seemed to hold the palm scriptures. “Here”, this was

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