Read Online 04 - Shock and Awesome by Camilla Chafer - Free Book Online
Authors: Camilla Chafer
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but felt a bunch less awesome under her stylish scrutiny. I hated when women managed to do that. It was a weird skill.
"Sale?"
"I don't shop sale," she shot back. That said it. On the plus side, she didn't know what she was missing when it came to sales shopping.
"Don't I know you?" Chic's husband looked me up and down with a little frown that half-turned into a smile as he tried to decide whether he recognized me from somewhere. I was pretty sure he didn't, but before I could answer, he nudged his wife. "Honey, here's the realtor." Mr. Chic, as I dubbed him, raised a hand to wave and I checked over my shoulder. Yup. Same realtor... and he double-booked us. What an ass! Even as I mentally added donkey ears to his white-blonde head, I saw an eager-looking third couple trotting along behind him. What were the odds of being triple-booked? Apparently, pretty good as the realtor beamed over his assembled crowd of apartment-seeking desperadoes.
"Great day for apartment hunting, huh? I'm Rick Taylor, and I'm your realtor today," he said with all the enthusiasm of a game show host. Grinning as he clapped his hands together, he might as well have just announced we were going to save lives! Today! "You can call me Rick. It's my name!"
Jerk, I thought.
"Awesome," said Mr Chic. Inexplicably, he and Rick high-fived.
"Let's head inside and see this place. You're going to love it," Rick promised to no one in particular. He gave his tie a quick adjustment, and punched a number into the keypad. As he held the door open and the Chics shot ahead, I caught him giving me an odd once-over before wrinkling his eyebrows. Perhaps he'd never seen a single woman before, I decided, while chastising him under my breath for being so judgmental.
The apartment was one of a rare breed and exactly as advertised. Light. Spacious. The furniture was modern, but comfortable, and showed off the great original features like the crown molding and fireplace. The galley kitchen was compact, but cleverly designed with plenty of storage, while the bathroom was neat and orderly with an equally surprising amount of storage. The bedroom was, in a word, dreamy. The whole place was a little smaller than my current home, and the view just as dull. It was also slightly more expensive, but I was used to the give-Lily's-friend-a-discount rate.
"We'll take it," said the Chics .
The third couple and I looked at each other. "I want it," I said at the same time the other husband blurted, "We'll sign the lease today."
"Way to go on the bargaining power," I muttered as the first couple rolled their eyes at each other. With all three of us wanting the apartment, it would surely come down to one thing now: money. Just the thing I wasn't exactly rolling in on my single income.
"It's just the right size for one," I murmured, loud enough for the couples to hear as I walked around. Perhaps a little reverse psychology would work? "I'd hate to share such a little apartment." I crossed to the window overlooking the street. "Oh my! Is that man breaking into that car?" I exclaimed in a shocked voice. "Is he taking the stereo?"
The realtor was beside me in a second, his worried eyes searching the street for the phantom thief. "I don't think so," he said, unconvincingly. "Probably just fixing it."
" Riiiight ," I agreed, nudging him in the ribs and giving him a big wink that the second couple saw. "Definitely fixing it. Sure. Absolutely. Did you say it's unsecured street parking?"
"Uh... yes."
"So, uh, we have some other places to see." The door shut behind the second couple, cutting off their excuses as they exited. One down, one to go.
"I know what you're doing," hissed Mrs. Chic. "I use reverse psychology on my kindergartners. You aren't going
"Sale?"
"I don't shop sale," she shot back. That said it. On the plus side, she didn't know what she was missing when it came to sales shopping.
"Don't I know you?" Chic's husband looked me up and down with a little frown that half-turned into a smile as he tried to decide whether he recognized me from somewhere. I was pretty sure he didn't, but before I could answer, he nudged his wife. "Honey, here's the realtor." Mr. Chic, as I dubbed him, raised a hand to wave and I checked over my shoulder. Yup. Same realtor... and he double-booked us. What an ass! Even as I mentally added donkey ears to his white-blonde head, I saw an eager-looking third couple trotting along behind him. What were the odds of being triple-booked? Apparently, pretty good as the realtor beamed over his assembled crowd of apartment-seeking desperadoes.
"Great day for apartment hunting, huh? I'm Rick Taylor, and I'm your realtor today," he said with all the enthusiasm of a game show host. Grinning as he clapped his hands together, he might as well have just announced we were going to save lives! Today! "You can call me Rick. It's my name!"
Jerk, I thought.
"Awesome," said Mr Chic. Inexplicably, he and Rick high-fived.
"Let's head inside and see this place. You're going to love it," Rick promised to no one in particular. He gave his tie a quick adjustment, and punched a number into the keypad. As he held the door open and the Chics shot ahead, I caught him giving me an odd once-over before wrinkling his eyebrows. Perhaps he'd never seen a single woman before, I decided, while chastising him under my breath for being so judgmental.
The apartment was one of a rare breed and exactly as advertised. Light. Spacious. The furniture was modern, but comfortable, and showed off the great original features like the crown molding and fireplace. The galley kitchen was compact, but cleverly designed with plenty of storage, while the bathroom was neat and orderly with an equally surprising amount of storage. The bedroom was, in a word, dreamy. The whole place was a little smaller than my current home, and the view just as dull. It was also slightly more expensive, but I was used to the give-Lily's-friend-a-discount rate.
"We'll take it," said the Chics .
The third couple and I looked at each other. "I want it," I said at the same time the other husband blurted, "We'll sign the lease today."
"Way to go on the bargaining power," I muttered as the first couple rolled their eyes at each other. With all three of us wanting the apartment, it would surely come down to one thing now: money. Just the thing I wasn't exactly rolling in on my single income.
"It's just the right size for one," I murmured, loud enough for the couples to hear as I walked around. Perhaps a little reverse psychology would work? "I'd hate to share such a little apartment." I crossed to the window overlooking the street. "Oh my! Is that man breaking into that car?" I exclaimed in a shocked voice. "Is he taking the stereo?"
The realtor was beside me in a second, his worried eyes searching the street for the phantom thief. "I don't think so," he said, unconvincingly. "Probably just fixing it."
" Riiiight ," I agreed, nudging him in the ribs and giving him a big wink that the second couple saw. "Definitely fixing it. Sure. Absolutely. Did you say it's unsecured street parking?"
"Uh... yes."
"So, uh, we have some other places to see." The door shut behind the second couple, cutting off their excuses as they exited. One down, one to go.
"I know what you're doing," hissed Mrs. Chic. "I use reverse psychology on my kindergartners. You aren't going
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