Read Online Fighting the Flames by Leslie Johnson - Free Book Online

with fear to let her guard down and trust. She just wasn’t ready yet. Maybe she’d never be.
    Ryan lowered his mouth and kissed her softly, his tongue a whisper over hers, and then a demand. She moaned and laid back on the bed, bringing him down over her. She clung to him and kissed him deeply; desperate to get as much of him as she could, knowing it could be the last time. Jessie pawed and tugged at his shirt until it was off and once again in a heap on the floor. She touched every inch of him that she could get her hands on: shoulders, back, chest, stomach, waist.
    “Oh Jess.” He pulled the blanket from her body and fondled her breast, his thumb rubbing over her nipple. “Trust me. All I want is to be with you.” He nipped at her bottom lip. “I can’t get enough of you. Please, baby.” His mouth crushed hers in a dominant, toe-curling kiss that had her fighting to catch her breath and gather her wits. “Please, Jess, say it. Say you’ll be with me.”
    It took all of her courage plus more she didn’t know she had to let her hands fall from his body. “Ryan, please, stop.” He recoiled as if she’d slapped him. It was the first time she’d ever told him no to sex.
    “What’s wrong?” he asked.
    “We can’t keep doing this. I’m not ready for a relationship.”
    Ryan sat up and took several deep breaths. “You’re not ready.” He grabbed his shirt and put it on again.
    “No. But I want to be friends, Ryan.”
    “Friends?” He laughed. “You. Want. To. Be. Friends.” He punched the words out.
    “Yes.”
    He shook his head. “And to fuck with what I want, right?” He slipped his feet into his sneakers.
    “Will you even try?” Her voice had taken on a high pitched whiny quality and she hated herself for it. The thought of not having Ryan in her life, even as a friend, was unbearable. She’d lived without him before. She didn’t think she’d survive it again. Yet, here she was, messing it up again. “Please?”
    “Fuck you.” He left without another word.
    Jessie buried her face in her pillow and sobbed. She’d succeeded in alienating Ryan and breaking his heart… again. What the hell was wrong with her?

Chapter 7
    T hree days later, Ryan was on duty at the station. He was thankful it had been a quiet day so he could hang out in the basement gym. He was in no mood to socialize. In fact, he couldn’t recall having a conversation with anyone for more than a minute or two since Jess had dropped the bomb on him. He beat the punching bag so hard his knuckles bled. She had left him three years earlier so she could marry another man. “Damn it!” He punched several times with his right hand and then his left. As if that wasn’t hard enough to swallow, she drops it on him that she just wants to be friends. Friends! “Fuck it.” He couldn’t be friends with her, not when he loved her like he did. How in the hell was he supposed to be around her and not touch her or kiss her? How in the world did she expect him to just hang out with her as if everything was okay? Things were far from okay. He hauled off and kicked the bag, waiting for it to swing back so he could wail on it again. The pain in his hands numbed the pain he felt in his heart.
    “Whoa, take it easy man.” Shane said, hanging onto the bag. “You’ve been down here all day.”
    “Need something, Shane?” Ryan flexed his fingers and winced. Fresh blood ran down the back of his hand. He went to the sink in the corner and ran it under cold water, wincing from the stinging pain.
    “We’re ordering food. You want anything?”
    “No.”
    “Dude, what’s up with you?” Shane leaned against the counter, folding his arms across his chest. “You haven’t been this miserable since you took that whole summer off after Vikki—”
    “Shut the fuck up!” Ryan pointed in Shane’s face. “I told you I never wanted to talk about that summer!”
    Shane put his hands up in a show of surrender. “Whoa, okay, sorry man. Didn’t