Read Online Z-Burbia: A Zombie Novel by Jake Bible - Free Book Online Page B

Pa,” she gasps. “It was your joke. I ruined it. Ruined the joke.”
    She starts smacking herself again.
    Pa stops her and pulls her to him, stroking her hair. She doesn’t stop turning the spit. Pa’s hair stroking gets faster and faster until I notice he’s kind of grinding against her. Ah, fuck, seriously?
    “My kids told me that joke,” I say quickly. “But it’s with an interrupting cow instead of a zombie. I like yours better.”
    “Ain’t mine,” Pa says, his hips stopping their obscenity. “I told you it was from two kids. Are you stupid, mister? Do you have to be told things twice?”
    “Stupid,” Elsbeth says, looking around Pa at me. “You’re stupid.”
    “Pot meet kettle,” I mumble.
    “What’s that?” Pa asks, and he moves at me faster than I think he can. His hand grabs my chin and pulls hard. “You say something to my girl?”
    “I think dinner’s ready, Pa,” Elsbeth says, taking some rags and lifting the spit off the fire.
    She walks it over to a dirty work bench and sets it down. Grease and juices start to drip over the edge and the smell makes my mouth water. Pa watches me and then nods.
    “I’m guessing you’re hungry,” he says. “Elsbeth, cut our guest a hunk. After today , we got plenty to feed a third mouth.”
    Elsbeth rips a chunk of meat from the roast and walks it over to me. The meat has to be burning her hand, but she doesn’t show any sign. Her eyes are bright and glassy and she just looks at me, a simple smile on her face.
    “You gonna like this, mister,” she says. “Long pork is good. The best.”
    The smell is incredible. I haven’t smelled fresh roasted meat in forever. We don’t keep livestock in Whispering Pines other than chickens. They take up too many resources. Easier to just grow beans for protein. And chicken does not smell like this. My mouth is drooling, but…then…I realize…
    “Long pork?” I ask.
    “Yep,” Pa smiles, “best kinda pork.”
    He laughs and Elsbeth laughs with him.
    “I, uh, think I’ll pass,” I say , “long pork gives me the runs.”
    He backhands me and my head snaps to the side.
    “Don’t be crude,” Pa snarls, “no potty talk like that in front of my girl.”
    “You should eat what’s offered,” Elsbeth says, the meat right under my nose. “Never know when you’re gonna eat again. That’s what Pa always says. Eat when you can, it may be the last you see for a while.”
    The boning knife comes out and my eyes are drawn to its wickedly sharp looking blade. I follow the blade up to the hand , up the arm, and to the shoulder, and then to the half-cheeked face. Pa looks at me with his one eye and I know he knows I know what the meat is. There is a lot of knowing going on. I really, really, wish I had none of it. The knowing, that is.
    “I’d rather not,” I say again. “I am sorry, but my stomach…it gets touchy with too much grease.”
    Elsbeth wipes the hunk of meat against her pants leg, leaving a shiny streak of fat. “There,” she says, offering me the meat again. “I wiped the grease off. It’s a shame since that’s where the flavor is.”
    She shoves the meat against my lips. I try to keep them closed, but she just keeps pushing. Then she takes her other hand and grips the back of my head.
    “Eat it!” she shouts. “Eat the fucking meat! It’s good! GOOD! LONG PORK IS GOOD!”
    She keeps screaming at me until I can’t hold back anymore. My lips are forced apart and the hunk of meat is shoved inside my mouth. I’m about to spit it out when Elsbeth brings out her own knife and pushes it up one nostril until I can smell and feel the trickle of blood.
    “Eat,” she says , “ain’t telling you again, mister. Eat what’s good for ya.”
    Oh fucking Jesus on th e cross with a head like a hole black as my soul oh fuck shit fuck.
    I chew.
    I swallow.
    I struggle.
    I lose.
    I puke.
    Elsbeth barely gets out of the way. She stands and looks at her pa. He shakes his head.
    “Too bad,