don't see. There must be another way."
Her anger flared anew. “You could get a fucking job!"
Bill turned away, hurt “I'm going to, I promise. Tomorrow."
She softened a little then. “Good. Otherwise, we won't make it."
Bill's head swiveled around. “Is he paying you?"
El hung her head.She told him of the arrangement she had with Jack and that she hoped to be able to pay him back within a couple of years.
"A couple of years? That's impossible! I'm not going to stand by while my wife becomes the sex slave to a maniacal businessman."
"Yes you will. You'll do nothing to disturb our arrangement. You can help me or you can divorce me. Those are your choices."
Bill sat back, stunned. El could read his face: He felt guilty for being out of work for so long. He probably had suspected El was bringing home too much money, but he'd never asked her about it.
"Well, what's it going to be? Are you in or are you out?"
Bill locked his eyes on hers. “When I married you, I promised to stick by you in sickness and in health, good days and bad,” he began. Ellen's heart lept with joy. He was going to help her. “But those same vows said something about being true to each other, forsaking all others, right? If you think I'm going to be able to sit by while you get fucked by strangers, you're mistaken. I don't care if you did steal money to help us."
El opened her mouth in shock. The joy she briefly felt vanished along with her remaining dignity. Then she became angry. She had gotten into this situation because of him and now he was getting ‘holier than thou’ on her?
"You bastard. You lazy bastard! You think I like this? You think I get off on this? I'm doing this for us, don't you see? I found a way out of an impossible situation and all you can do is sit there and act pious?"
Bill shook his head. “You're not doing this for us. You're doing this to save your career. My career will get started again. I haven't stolen anything—or fucked anyone. Above all, you didn't talk to me about this before you started spreading your legs!"
He stood up. “You can fuck Jack and anyone he chooses, but if you think I'm going to play cuckold, you're out of your mind.” He stalked out of the room.
El sat there, unable to think clearly. She was still angry with him for getting her into this mess, but she had to admit, he was right: she had made the decision unilaterally. She told him the way it was going to be. For some reason, she thought he would understand, that he would feel remorse for his lack of effort. That he would abandon her had never seemed like a real possibility.
She got up and went to the bedroom. Bill had a suitcase on the bed and was packing. “Where are you going?"
"For now, back to my parents.” He looked up. “I know, I'm too old to be running home to mamma, but I don't have the funds to start myself up somewhere else right now. Once I get a job, I'll find a place."
"Just like that, you're throwing six years of marriage out the window?"
"No, not ‘just like that.’ It took a stunning act of betrayal to do it."
El's mouth worked, but no sounds came out. Her anger, her humiliation, her fear all combined and contradicted each other in her mind. Then another voice, a tiny, wicked voice called out: Now you can do what you've always wanted to do. She shook the stray thought out of her head. She didn't want to do this, how crazy that idea was! But it was like a tickle or an itch she couldn't scratch.
Bill finished packing. El stood there, trying to think of something to say. Did she want him to go? She could cancel the deal, go to prison. Would Bill wait for her?
No, she decided. He wouldn't. Their marriage had been rocky before, now it had finally shattered. She couldn't save it by herself. She was truly on her own.
At the door, Bill turned to her. “Goodbye, Ellen. I'll miss you, I really will. I'll come by later for the rest of my things. Good luck with your new job.” He said the last with a sarcasm
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