Read Online Witch Slapped (Witchless In Seattle Mysteries Book 1) by Dakota Cassidy - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Dakota Cassidy
Tags: General Fiction
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era and is incredibly forgetful. It was frightfully easy. Madam Zoltar printed up a new, fake document under my instruction, and voila. Instant revision.”
“So you had her break the law for you. A nice little old lady like that?”
“I would never have allowed her to be caught, and I broke the law to save this side of the pond from Cousin Sal. You’ll thank me, should you ever meet.”
It was my turn to sigh, tiring rapidly of the spy game. I plunked down on the bottom step of the huge staircase, mindless of the debris. “So you had her change it to who? What does that mean?”
“It means I left my house and all my worldly possessions to you .”
Chapter 6
A ll the blood drained from my face. My mouth opened, but it didn’t want to cooperate with words. Not even smallish ones. It just hung there, all unhinged.
“I can see by your jaw scraping the floor I’ve surprised you.”
“Only confetti and a clown car would match my level of surprise.”
Had he been kidding when he’d said he’d left the house to me? I looked out the big bay window in the parlor overlooking the Sound at the choppy gray waters and blinked.
“And I guess you want to know why I’d leave my most treasured possession to you, and not a family member—or the DIY Channel.”
“I can’t make a decision. I mean, there are a whole list of pros and cons I need to make before I decide if I want to know why.”
“I left it to you because you need this house, and it needs you. And the afterlife says you need help, and, above all, you can be trusted.”
I scratched my head. “Is this your big afterlife pay-it-forward? Am I the charity case of the millennium to make up for all the charity cases you ignored in your former life? What are they feeding you in the afterlife to make such a big decision?”
Win scoffed at me. “I’m insulted you think I ignored charity while I was here on Earth. That cuts deep.”
“Do spies donate to charity?”
“You’d be surprised what we spies do for a good cause. Haven’t you ever heard of Spies For Tots? Never mind. Scratch that. No one’s supposed to know we exist.”
I fought a chuckle. “So why would you leave all this to me? You don’t even know me.”
“Honesty?”
“Should there ever be anything else between an ex-witch and the specter who’s attached himself to her like a boil on her butt?”
“The truth is, I can’t stand Sal. He’s a bag of utter dicks. He’ll turn this place into some ugly eyesore full of sterile chrome, white walls, and high-tech gadgets. Also, he’s awful. The kind of awful that kicks puppies and pulls walkers right out from under the elderly. A place like this needs attention to detail, Stevie; it needs to be filled with things from days gone by. It needs love. I didn’t have time to change my will before my untimely demise, but when I found this place just before I died, I’d already decided to do just that. I just ran out of time. But that’s all handled now.”
“It needs a whole lot more than love. It needs a backhoe.”
“Bite your tongue.”
I let my arms rest on my knees and looked at the sprawling home, most of which I hadn’t even seen yet. It could really be something, given serious attention. It could be a dream come true. My mind raced with the possibilities, the potential, but my life was a wreck. I didn’t have time to babysit contractors and subcontractors. I needed to find a job and some self-worth.
“Listen, it was really weird…nice, but weird of you to leave me your dilapidated fixer-upper, but in the interest of giving this house some love, love costs money. In this case, it’s going to cost a lot of money. I don’t have enough money for my lunch. I certainly don’t have enough to not only get a place like this up and running, but keep it running. So thanks, but you’d better start making dirty-dirty promises to another psychic to fix your will again. Oh, and while you’re hanging around the afterlife, please tell
“So you had her break the law for you. A nice little old lady like that?”
“I would never have allowed her to be caught, and I broke the law to save this side of the pond from Cousin Sal. You’ll thank me, should you ever meet.”
It was my turn to sigh, tiring rapidly of the spy game. I plunked down on the bottom step of the huge staircase, mindless of the debris. “So you had her change it to who? What does that mean?”
“It means I left my house and all my worldly possessions to you .”
Chapter 6
A ll the blood drained from my face. My mouth opened, but it didn’t want to cooperate with words. Not even smallish ones. It just hung there, all unhinged.
“I can see by your jaw scraping the floor I’ve surprised you.”
“Only confetti and a clown car would match my level of surprise.”
Had he been kidding when he’d said he’d left the house to me? I looked out the big bay window in the parlor overlooking the Sound at the choppy gray waters and blinked.
“And I guess you want to know why I’d leave my most treasured possession to you, and not a family member—or the DIY Channel.”
“I can’t make a decision. I mean, there are a whole list of pros and cons I need to make before I decide if I want to know why.”
“I left it to you because you need this house, and it needs you. And the afterlife says you need help, and, above all, you can be trusted.”
I scratched my head. “Is this your big afterlife pay-it-forward? Am I the charity case of the millennium to make up for all the charity cases you ignored in your former life? What are they feeding you in the afterlife to make such a big decision?”
Win scoffed at me. “I’m insulted you think I ignored charity while I was here on Earth. That cuts deep.”
“Do spies donate to charity?”
“You’d be surprised what we spies do for a good cause. Haven’t you ever heard of Spies For Tots? Never mind. Scratch that. No one’s supposed to know we exist.”
I fought a chuckle. “So why would you leave all this to me? You don’t even know me.”
“Honesty?”
“Should there ever be anything else between an ex-witch and the specter who’s attached himself to her like a boil on her butt?”
“The truth is, I can’t stand Sal. He’s a bag of utter dicks. He’ll turn this place into some ugly eyesore full of sterile chrome, white walls, and high-tech gadgets. Also, he’s awful. The kind of awful that kicks puppies and pulls walkers right out from under the elderly. A place like this needs attention to detail, Stevie; it needs to be filled with things from days gone by. It needs love. I didn’t have time to change my will before my untimely demise, but when I found this place just before I died, I’d already decided to do just that. I just ran out of time. But that’s all handled now.”
“It needs a whole lot more than love. It needs a backhoe.”
“Bite your tongue.”
I let my arms rest on my knees and looked at the sprawling home, most of which I hadn’t even seen yet. It could really be something, given serious attention. It could be a dream come true. My mind raced with the possibilities, the potential, but my life was a wreck. I didn’t have time to babysit contractors and subcontractors. I needed to find a job and some self-worth.
“Listen, it was really weird…nice, but weird of you to leave me your dilapidated fixer-upper, but in the interest of giving this house some love, love costs money. In this case, it’s going to cost a lot of money. I don’t have enough money for my lunch. I certainly don’t have enough to not only get a place like this up and running, but keep it running. So thanks, but you’d better start making dirty-dirty promises to another psychic to fix your will again. Oh, and while you’re hanging around the afterlife, please tell
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