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Authors: Subir Banerjee
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reciprocate. He’d feel compelled to oblige by uniting me with her.
So today I had renewed my proposal a second time, but immediately she had spurned my offer again. I was getting used to the heartbreak by now. A steely determination had started taking shape in my mind by now. I’d persevere till the end, till she said yes. There was nothing else in my life other than succeeding in love. That was the only way to get my life back on track. Through all the haze and storm, and deluge of tears and heartbreaks, I could see only one goal left in my life. Her! I was determined to get there.
I suppose it’s sometimes difficult to read a career conscious woman's mind. Deep within, I still held hopes that she felt something for me, but the statistics seemed overwhelmingly against me so far.
It wasn’t long before Shalini passed her MBA selection exam successfully and disappeared for two years to Bangalore to complete her MBA at a prestigious KIM. Bangalore was like another planet, quite far from Delhi- separated by a distance of over 1500 miles. By train the journey from Delhi took close to two nights while it was almost three hours by air.
I returned to my spiritual haven in the nearby city of pilgrimage that I’d been frequenting. My renunciation was obviously incomplete. Over the next year I tried to time my visits home with her vacations but missed her twice. So I expressed a desire at home to travel to Bangalore for sightseeing. My father had been observing my meandering ways for a while, without voicing his concerns. But now he spoke up, sounding firm.
"Enough of chasing girls and spirituality," he said ominously. Coming from him, I took it seriously. "The two don't go well together. You're obviously confused.”
I pursed my lips, thinking how I could explain to him that I wasn’t confused. I was madly in love. Love was such a wonderful, once in a lifetime, experience. How could one disown the feeling and walk away from it?
“I think it’s time your started working, Rajat,” he went on. “It’d help organize your life better. You've already wasted about two years since graduation."
When I didn't respond, he took it upon himself to apply to a few job vacancies on my behalf. He patiently tolerated my utter lack of seriousness about material life and went about fixing the damage as best as he could.
I waited with bated breath the day Shalini arrived from Bangalore after completing her MBA. Everyone else my age was already working but I kept waiting for her. A lot of water had flown down the Ganges River while I chased her unsuccessfully. During this time she’d not only completed her MBA from a prestigious institute, but also landed a fabulous job in Delhi.
On my part, I’d attended an interview for a government job last year to which my father had applied on my behalf. He’d all along been employed in government service himself and felt it safer to have his unpredictable, unstable son similarly employed, in the government sector. In those days joining government service was considered respectable and the jobs carried superannuation benefit too, which was later stopped for new joiners around the middle of the decade.
“If you complete a certain number of years in your job, you'd be eligible for a pension,” he explained.
I knew what was on his mind. He wasn’t sure how long his unstable son could carry on in a job before deciding to chuck it all of a sudden. So he was eager to see me in a job that carried security and post retirement benefits.
“But they don’t pay well,” I objected meekly.
“It’s better than getting nothing,” he replied pointedly. In a more encouraging tone he explained, “Government jobs may not be as bad as you think. Initially the salary seems low, but I’ve interacted with a lot of IAS officers- you know, the administrative services officers- in my jobs, and seen them prosper to the extent of buying two or three houses, sometimes more, besides owning good, new cars
So today I had renewed my proposal a second time, but immediately she had spurned my offer again. I was getting used to the heartbreak by now. A steely determination had started taking shape in my mind by now. I’d persevere till the end, till she said yes. There was nothing else in my life other than succeeding in love. That was the only way to get my life back on track. Through all the haze and storm, and deluge of tears and heartbreaks, I could see only one goal left in my life. Her! I was determined to get there.
I suppose it’s sometimes difficult to read a career conscious woman's mind. Deep within, I still held hopes that she felt something for me, but the statistics seemed overwhelmingly against me so far.
It wasn’t long before Shalini passed her MBA selection exam successfully and disappeared for two years to Bangalore to complete her MBA at a prestigious KIM. Bangalore was like another planet, quite far from Delhi- separated by a distance of over 1500 miles. By train the journey from Delhi took close to two nights while it was almost three hours by air.
I returned to my spiritual haven in the nearby city of pilgrimage that I’d been frequenting. My renunciation was obviously incomplete. Over the next year I tried to time my visits home with her vacations but missed her twice. So I expressed a desire at home to travel to Bangalore for sightseeing. My father had been observing my meandering ways for a while, without voicing his concerns. But now he spoke up, sounding firm.
"Enough of chasing girls and spirituality," he said ominously. Coming from him, I took it seriously. "The two don't go well together. You're obviously confused.”
I pursed my lips, thinking how I could explain to him that I wasn’t confused. I was madly in love. Love was such a wonderful, once in a lifetime, experience. How could one disown the feeling and walk away from it?
“I think it’s time your started working, Rajat,” he went on. “It’d help organize your life better. You've already wasted about two years since graduation."
When I didn't respond, he took it upon himself to apply to a few job vacancies on my behalf. He patiently tolerated my utter lack of seriousness about material life and went about fixing the damage as best as he could.
I waited with bated breath the day Shalini arrived from Bangalore after completing her MBA. Everyone else my age was already working but I kept waiting for her. A lot of water had flown down the Ganges River while I chased her unsuccessfully. During this time she’d not only completed her MBA from a prestigious institute, but also landed a fabulous job in Delhi.
On my part, I’d attended an interview for a government job last year to which my father had applied on my behalf. He’d all along been employed in government service himself and felt it safer to have his unpredictable, unstable son similarly employed, in the government sector. In those days joining government service was considered respectable and the jobs carried superannuation benefit too, which was later stopped for new joiners around the middle of the decade.
“If you complete a certain number of years in your job, you'd be eligible for a pension,” he explained.
I knew what was on his mind. He wasn’t sure how long his unstable son could carry on in a job before deciding to chuck it all of a sudden. So he was eager to see me in a job that carried security and post retirement benefits.
“But they don’t pay well,” I objected meekly.
“It’s better than getting nothing,” he replied pointedly. In a more encouraging tone he explained, “Government jobs may not be as bad as you think. Initially the salary seems low, but I’ve interacted with a lot of IAS officers- you know, the administrative services officers- in my jobs, and seen them prosper to the extent of buying two or three houses, sometimes more, besides owning good, new cars
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