When in Rome...

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Authors: Gemma Townley
Tags: Fiction, General, Humorous, Romance, Contemporary
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“How’s things?”
    She’s about to start talking, when, before I can help it, I interrupt with “Seen much of Mike?”
    It’s no use. I just can’t wait for her to tell me about her life. I’ve been bottling this Mike thing up for days, and I need to talk about it. I try to sound nonchalant, but unfortunately the question comes out a bit quickly, with a little bit too much emotion attached.
    Candy looks up sharply.
    Okay, so maybe that wasn’t the best thing to say. I’ve got to impress upon Candy that I am over Mike, but that he is obviously not over me. Far from it. Maybe I should try a different tack.
    “I mean, well, you’re friends, aren’t you?” I mutter, trying to make out that there was no significance to my question. I don’t want to just tell her about Mike. I want her to ask. I want her to drag the facts out of me.
    “So how are you?” I ask again.
    “George, look, I’m sorry we haven’t seen each other for such a long time. I’ve been really busy at work and . . . well, you know. The things is, I kind of brought you out under false pretenses today,” she begins slowly.
    Oh God, Mike’s here, I think. He’s asked her to get me out so that he can spend the afternoon with me. I look around, but can’t see him.
    Candy is staring into her coffee.
    “The thing is, George, I’m pregnant.”
    Okay, I was not expecting that. “Pregnant? Candy, I didn’t even know you were seeing anyone!”
    It occurs to me that I wouldn’t really know.
    “How . . . how did it happen?”
    Candy sort of snorts and stares at me. “George, I don’t think I need to go into that level of detail do I?”
    “No, sorry, of course not. I just . . . it . . . I’m just surprised, that’s all. So, are you, I mean, do you think you’ll . . .”
    “Keep it?” she asks. “Oh yes, definitely. But I don’t know. I haven’t told my parents yet. I haven’t dared.”
    I can see why she’s scared. Candy’s parents are completely terrifying. Even my mother is scared of them—she met them once at a party and couldn’t get away quickly enough. They are like your worst nightmare headmistress and headmaster rolled into one. And they certainly aren’t the sort to embrace single motherhood. Her mother went into a complete decline when Candy had her belly button pierced; the prospect of a baby would probably finish her off.
    “So who’s the father? Do you think you’ll get married?”
    Actually this is really cool. I could be godmother or something. A bad thought comes into my head and I try to push it out with little success. Candy will get stretch marks. Well, I told you it wasn’t a nice thought. But it’s true, isn’t it. She might even get fat and not be able to lose the weight. Okay, Georgie, focus on the real issues here. This isimportant .
    “I don’t really want to say who the father is, actually, if that’s okay,” Candy is saying, still staring into her coffee cup. “He’s . . . well, he needs time to get used to the idea, obviously. But we’re really in love and stuff. I mean, he adores me.”
    Wow. Candy pregnant. I can hardly believe it. And even if she doesn’t get married, all her friends are so loaded that at least she’ll be okay financially. I’m sure she will get married, though. Ooh, I could be a bridesmaid. I resolve to be a really good friend and listen to everything Candy says—if she gets married, she’s bound to have really lovely bridesmaids dresses. And, obviously, I want to be there for her on her special day. Bridesmaids generally get presents, too, don’t they?
    “Are you going to give up work if you keep it?” The only reason I can ever think of for having a baby is all the time off work you get. Actually it’s quite a compelling one. Although you’d also need a nanny, wouldn’t you, otherwise you’d spend all your free time having to look after a baby instead of doing nice things. But if Candy doesn’t get married, who’s going to pay for the nanny?
    “Work?” says Candy thoughtfully, as if it’s something she hasn’t even considered. “Oh,

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