do before I was born and when I was younger. Although back then I also held him responsible for my mother’s death, I’d listen, and by the time the stories ended, we’d both be brought to tears because we both missed her so much.
Two years went by, and I was just beginning to accept the fact that my mother was gone. I had stopped blaming my father, and gave it up to being God’s will. I figured that no one made my mother stay with my dad. She had free will to leave whenever she wanted, but she stayed. What her reasons were I didn’t know, but whatever they were, she stuck it out. Not long after I received another blow. I had begun to notice that my father was losing weight rapidly, and no matter what type of day it was, he was never hungry. As time went on he started to complain about his stomach hurting, but I paid it no mind, because I noticed that he still felt well enough to drink, so I figured he was fine.
One day after witnessing him throw up blood, I knew that it was time to get him checked out. I rushed him to the emergency room, where they kept him for a few days for observation. On the third day my father was diagnosed with liver disease and told that he had less than a year to live. He died two months later, leaving me alone and angry with the world. To this day I believe that he drunk himself to death on purpose as payback for the way he treated my mother. Whether that’s true or not I don’t know, but it damn sure seemed that way to me.
Now in front of the barber shop, I wipe away the tears that were welling up in my eyes. I miss both my parents dearly, and thinking about them always has me choked up, so I try not to do it much. Just the thought of what my mother went through with my dad makes me want to get my act together. I never want Shanair to have to go through any of that, and I don’t know what I’ll do if I lost her behind something I did. Being a better man is something that I need to work harder at doing. Now I know that I’m not going to say that this change will happen immediately, but I’ll definitely be working on myself, because my baby deserves it.
Chapter 7
Shanair
The last thirty minutes have been spent working in silence. Naomi has been quiet because she’s upset by the way that I handle Terry, and I’m sitting here trapped in my own thoughts. This right here is something that I don’t need, because not only am I tired as hell, but I need to keep busy so I won’t fall asleep. Add in the fact that I need someone to talk to. At times, dealing with Terry can be exhausting, and with me not having more friends, Naomi is the only person that I feel comfortable talking to.
“Since you’re angry, I guess you don’t want to know what happened when Terry finally got home,” I break the silence. Since I know that my best friend is nosey, I’m hoping that it will reel her into speaking again.
“Oh, I already know what happened,” she assured me. “You yelled and talked a bunch of shit, and by the time you left the house everything was cool, right?” Naomi asks. She never once looks my way. When I don’t respond, she repeats herself, “Am I right Nair?”
“Well I told him that he bette—” I start, but she cuts in mid-sentence.
“You told him what Nair, that he better not do it again?” Naomi snaps. She finally turns to face me with her head cocked to the side. “That you’re going to leave him the next time it happens. What? What could you have possibly said to him this time?!”
“Why are you yelling?” I whisper looking around nervously. “I don’t need these muthafuckas knowing my damn business.”
Naomi speaks again, this time in a lower tone.
“Come on now Nair, Terry is a fucking dog and everybody already knows,” she points out. She must have seen the saddened look in my eyes, because she lightened her tone when she continued. “You know I love you. You also know that what I’m saying is true. Terry ain’t shit, and you my dear…you
Two years went by, and I was just beginning to accept the fact that my mother was gone. I had stopped blaming my father, and gave it up to being God’s will. I figured that no one made my mother stay with my dad. She had free will to leave whenever she wanted, but she stayed. What her reasons were I didn’t know, but whatever they were, she stuck it out. Not long after I received another blow. I had begun to notice that my father was losing weight rapidly, and no matter what type of day it was, he was never hungry. As time went on he started to complain about his stomach hurting, but I paid it no mind, because I noticed that he still felt well enough to drink, so I figured he was fine.
One day after witnessing him throw up blood, I knew that it was time to get him checked out. I rushed him to the emergency room, where they kept him for a few days for observation. On the third day my father was diagnosed with liver disease and told that he had less than a year to live. He died two months later, leaving me alone and angry with the world. To this day I believe that he drunk himself to death on purpose as payback for the way he treated my mother. Whether that’s true or not I don’t know, but it damn sure seemed that way to me.
Now in front of the barber shop, I wipe away the tears that were welling up in my eyes. I miss both my parents dearly, and thinking about them always has me choked up, so I try not to do it much. Just the thought of what my mother went through with my dad makes me want to get my act together. I never want Shanair to have to go through any of that, and I don’t know what I’ll do if I lost her behind something I did. Being a better man is something that I need to work harder at doing. Now I know that I’m not going to say that this change will happen immediately, but I’ll definitely be working on myself, because my baby deserves it.
Chapter 7
Shanair
The last thirty minutes have been spent working in silence. Naomi has been quiet because she’s upset by the way that I handle Terry, and I’m sitting here trapped in my own thoughts. This right here is something that I don’t need, because not only am I tired as hell, but I need to keep busy so I won’t fall asleep. Add in the fact that I need someone to talk to. At times, dealing with Terry can be exhausting, and with me not having more friends, Naomi is the only person that I feel comfortable talking to.
“Since you’re angry, I guess you don’t want to know what happened when Terry finally got home,” I break the silence. Since I know that my best friend is nosey, I’m hoping that it will reel her into speaking again.
“Oh, I already know what happened,” she assured me. “You yelled and talked a bunch of shit, and by the time you left the house everything was cool, right?” Naomi asks. She never once looks my way. When I don’t respond, she repeats herself, “Am I right Nair?”
“Well I told him that he bette—” I start, but she cuts in mid-sentence.
“You told him what Nair, that he better not do it again?” Naomi snaps. She finally turns to face me with her head cocked to the side. “That you’re going to leave him the next time it happens. What? What could you have possibly said to him this time?!”
“Why are you yelling?” I whisper looking around nervously. “I don’t need these muthafuckas knowing my damn business.”
Naomi speaks again, this time in a lower tone.
“Come on now Nair, Terry is a fucking dog and everybody already knows,” she points out. She must have seen the saddened look in my eyes, because she lightened her tone when she continued. “You know I love you. You also know that what I’m saying is true. Terry ain’t shit, and you my dear…you
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