refused to ride in that elevator again, we checked out and I
raided the stand next to the counter that had maps and various pamphlets on
vacation destinations.
When we got in the car,
Dylan noticed all the maps. “Did you rob the chambers of commerce?”
“No.” I pushed a few
toward him. “I just thought they’d be handy.”
Eyeing the maps, he
picked up the one for San Diego and then tossed it aside placing the keys in
the ignition. “Uh-huh,” he didn’t look impressed at all.
He probably thought I
was questioning his navigation skills.
Before we got back on
the highway, Dylan stopped at the gas station to fill up and check the oil. I
tried again to pay for gas but he declined.
Knowing my dad would
soon cancel my cards and account, I took the time to get as much money out of
my bank account. The clerk made me sign a form for the advance from my saving
account and I’ll admit my hand shook slightly thinking that this was my college
fund I was withdrawing. Any future I had was tied to this money and here I was
not thinking about that future any longer.
I ended up withdrawing
all of it thinking if my dad had any connections, which he does, the money
would be gone come Monday.
As I signed that paper,
another thing occurred to me. This feeling, the reason I left, had been
festering for a while. Eventually, it would have come to a head whether it was
at college or ten years later. Deep down, I wasn’t happy. I’m not sure when it
started, I couldn’t pin point a day but it was sometime after Homecoming this
last year. I also knew that throughout the year, the feeling, the gut wrenching
agony, got louder and I couldn’t ignore it as easily. After a while, like a
loud voice, it was all I heard. Run. Get out.
So I did.
It was a feeling that
snuck up on me and sunk into my skin until one day I woke up and realized I
didn’t want the life I had. I was sure that I wasn’t the only one that had felt
like this before.
After the gas station,
we ate some breakfast at a small diner up the street. The waitress flirted with
Dylan so blatantly it actually pissed me off.
I was not experienced
in flirting but I understood when two people were sitting next to one another
this usually meant they were friends and you shouldn’t flirt with them until
you understood they weren’t together. I never gave her the impression I wasn’t with Dylan so naturally the teenage girl in me was upset.
Without thinking, I
moved to sit closer to him in hopes that this would deter her
a little but it didn’t, it only made Dylan look at me like I was some
harebrained lunatic. I probably was.
Once we got back on the
road, I started thinking about where this could go with us and where it
shouldn’t. Judging by the diner, I was obviously attracted to him. I stared at
him shamelessly this morning without regard and he knew it. If I had to guess,
I would say that he was attracted to me too but I wasn’t positive.
Watching the side of
the road, other than flat land, it offered nothing for my questions. I had my
legs pulled up to my chest contemplating what I wanted out of this.
I felt Dylan swerve the
steering wheel slightly. The rumble strips vibrated my seat and I looked over
at him.
He mumbled something I
couldn’t hear before shifting uncomfortably and looking to his left out the
window.
“What was that for?”
“Nothing.” Diverting his eyes, he squinted a few times as if he was trying to adjust his
vision.
Glancing down, I
realized why he swerved.
My tank top was rather
low and while I was hugging my legs, it had created quite the push up result on
my boobs.
Classic.
Each city we passed through offered its
own appeal to me. I wondered how many people had drove this same path only to stop and make a life for them. I could see myself doing
the same thing.
It was incredibly hot
driving through northern California that afternoon. With a steady breeze, it
helped but the humidity was starting to get to me. Without
raided the stand next to the counter that had maps and various pamphlets on
vacation destinations.
When we got in the car,
Dylan noticed all the maps. “Did you rob the chambers of commerce?”
“No.” I pushed a few
toward him. “I just thought they’d be handy.”
Eyeing the maps, he
picked up the one for San Diego and then tossed it aside placing the keys in
the ignition. “Uh-huh,” he didn’t look impressed at all.
He probably thought I
was questioning his navigation skills.
Before we got back on
the highway, Dylan stopped at the gas station to fill up and check the oil. I
tried again to pay for gas but he declined.
Knowing my dad would
soon cancel my cards and account, I took the time to get as much money out of
my bank account. The clerk made me sign a form for the advance from my saving
account and I’ll admit my hand shook slightly thinking that this was my college
fund I was withdrawing. Any future I had was tied to this money and here I was
not thinking about that future any longer.
I ended up withdrawing
all of it thinking if my dad had any connections, which he does, the money
would be gone come Monday.
As I signed that paper,
another thing occurred to me. This feeling, the reason I left, had been
festering for a while. Eventually, it would have come to a head whether it was
at college or ten years later. Deep down, I wasn’t happy. I’m not sure when it
started, I couldn’t pin point a day but it was sometime after Homecoming this
last year. I also knew that throughout the year, the feeling, the gut wrenching
agony, got louder and I couldn’t ignore it as easily. After a while, like a
loud voice, it was all I heard. Run. Get out.
So I did.
It was a feeling that
snuck up on me and sunk into my skin until one day I woke up and realized I
didn’t want the life I had. I was sure that I wasn’t the only one that had felt
like this before.
After the gas station,
we ate some breakfast at a small diner up the street. The waitress flirted with
Dylan so blatantly it actually pissed me off.
I was not experienced
in flirting but I understood when two people were sitting next to one another
this usually meant they were friends and you shouldn’t flirt with them until
you understood they weren’t together. I never gave her the impression I wasn’t with Dylan so naturally the teenage girl in me was upset.
Without thinking, I
moved to sit closer to him in hopes that this would deter her
a little but it didn’t, it only made Dylan look at me like I was some
harebrained lunatic. I probably was.
Once we got back on the
road, I started thinking about where this could go with us and where it
shouldn’t. Judging by the diner, I was obviously attracted to him. I stared at
him shamelessly this morning without regard and he knew it. If I had to guess,
I would say that he was attracted to me too but I wasn’t positive.
Watching the side of
the road, other than flat land, it offered nothing for my questions. I had my
legs pulled up to my chest contemplating what I wanted out of this.
I felt Dylan swerve the
steering wheel slightly. The rumble strips vibrated my seat and I looked over
at him.
He mumbled something I
couldn’t hear before shifting uncomfortably and looking to his left out the
window.
“What was that for?”
“Nothing.” Diverting his eyes, he squinted a few times as if he was trying to adjust his
vision.
Glancing down, I
realized why he swerved.
My tank top was rather
low and while I was hugging my legs, it had created quite the push up result on
my boobs.
Classic.
Each city we passed through offered its
own appeal to me. I wondered how many people had drove this same path only to stop and make a life for them. I could see myself doing
the same thing.
It was incredibly hot
driving through northern California that afternoon. With a steady breeze, it
helped but the humidity was starting to get to me. Without
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