signals?â
Charlie was happy to hear her cell go off in her purse. She could turn her back on him. It was Ronald Dorland, a fairly new client with a book out last year. Heâd had some minor success with filmwriting assignments before that and was astonished when she answered instead of her voice-mail message. He couldnât understand the first royalty statement for his book.
âYou donât want to know,â Charlie told him.
âBut I do. I took it to my accountant, Charlie. He didnât understand it either.â
âJoin the crowd. Letâs see, that would be Bootstrap, a subsidiary of Wonderhouse who just merged with Dallywood, a subsidiary of Sherman/Sturtz just bought out by a German brewery whose name I canât pronounce whose parent company makes titanium nuts and bolts and body parts for repairs.â Charlie should know, she had one of their plates implanted in her neck. âAnd itself part of a conglomerate specializing in diversification run by a management firmâSORRI.â
âBut my publisher is Zulu Press, not any of those other publishers.â
âMerged with Bootstrap two years ago.â
âWhich all means what?â
âGet kneepads.â
âI thought agents were supposed to keep authors from getting screwed.â
âLook, most writers never get published at all. I was able to get you a contract for a two thousand advanceâyou are now on the bottom rung of a very tall ladder. Itâs either the beginning of a climb or you fall off and expire as an author or turn to self-publishing, which is pretty much the same thing. With that advance youâre lucky the books got out of the warehouse. With that advance there is no clout for an agent to use.â Charlieâs commission on that advance didnât pay its share of the paperwork or overhead.
âSo Iâm never going to see any royalties? This is just like Hollywood.â
âLook at it this way, Ronald, kneepads are cheap.â
Ten
âKneepads,â Kenny said, wide-eyed and for once not in total sarcastic control of a situation. âYou talking praying or sodomy? Was that a client?â
âWell, it wasnât a gardener. Ronald published his first book last year and just received his first royalty statement.â
âOh. You were talkingââ
âRight.â
Luella Ridgeway, dressed in slacks and flats instead of business suit and heels, appeared from an angled walkway, talking on her cell. âHang on a minute. Charlie, I need paper and pen. You have any in your purse?â
Before Charlie could make a move, a small notepad opened to a clean page descended from the porch above with a ballpoint and muscled forearm for a writing surface. Luella paused to stare up at the command center of this instant office, glance puzzlement at Charlie. âOkay, go ahead.â
Luella was small, smart, swift, and savvy. She used the proffered desk as if she expected no less from the world as Kenny held the pad still for her so she could hold the cell and the pen. He had to bend almost double over the railing. Charlie wished she had a camera.
âYouâre sure? Whatâs the source on that? Okay. Go on.â Finally, she thanked her informant and punched off, tore out the pages sheâd used and handed the notepad and pen back to the desk whom she thanked also and asked Charlie, âHe for hire?â
âI only handle his writing talents. Luella Ridgeway, Kenneth Cooper. Luella is Dr. Judyâs agent, also Congdon and Morse. So what you got?â
âWell, Iâve talked to her doctor, her lawyer, and her daughter.â
âShe had a daughter?â
âAnd a granddaughter. And an ex. And a boyfriend.â
âWhoâd have thought?â
âCharlie, I keep telling you to stop stereotyping everyone you meet. You miss so much that way.â
âYeah, and sheâs totally cynical too,â Kenny
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