Read Online VAIN - Part Three (The VAIN Series Book 3) by Deborah Bladon - Free Book Online Page A

moving backwards instead of forward.
    "Of course." It's a response meant to pull at his curiosity. He already knows that I would have preferred to have gone to the restaurant. I hadn't suggested it because he'd look uncomfortable and tell me that he didn't feel up to it. It was the same dance steps we'd perfected back in Boston. He wasn't making any effort to move outside of this cocoon either.
    He stands and my eyes instantly hone in on his cock. It's beautiful, but it's a wicked reminder of the reason why he pushed me away in the first place. If I nag him about wanting to go out I'm fearful that he'll push harder this time and any promise of a future together that we might have had will be gone for good. I can't keep wishing things were different though. I can't keep carrying around the senseless hope that one day he'll decide that the world outside his sheltered hiding space is not going to emotionally destroy him.
    "I hate being stared at." I'm not sure if the words are directed at me personally or if he's speaking in generalities.
    "I was only staring at your dick." I motion towards it with my fork. My appetite has escaped me. "I thought you were going to wear pants more often."
    "I was hot." He winks before he picks up both of our dinner plates and pads off down the hallway towards the kitchen.
    I'm frustrated. Not just because he consistently makes light of everything dark, mysterious and closed off about him, but because I feel as though he's never going to venture outside of the world he's built for himself. We were making progress in Boston until Brighton showed him those pictures and Camilla gave him a glimpse into what his world would be with a baby.
    "Tell me about the school." He's back, nodding towards the large couch in the next room.
    I follow silently hoping that I'll somehow find the strength within the few steps from here to there to bring up the subject that is almost leaping off my tongue.
    "Do you like it there?" His words feels misplaced and I can't mentally push myself back to where we were just a few minutes ago.
    "Where?" I ask softly as I settle in next to him on the large sofa. I pull my sweater tighter around my frame. I need a barrier between my body and his.
    "The school, Alexa… the one in Brooklyn? How's that going?"
    I smile softly remembering how exhilarating today had been. I was in charge of an entire class of nine-year-olds and although it was intimidating two days ago when I started the assignment, I'm finding my groove now. I belong in the classroom and this random substitute teacher work is proving that to me more and more every time I step foot into a new school. "I love it," I admit. "The children are amazing. I stayed late because they have an afterschool program."
    "You're beaming." His finger jumps to my chin. "You're so happy."
    Guilt rushes through me at the word. It's the same word he used back in Boston when he unceremoniously kicked me to the curb. I curse inwardly, knowing that it might just bring up all those repressed feelings that he's been ignoring since he arrived in Manhattan. Sooner or later my happiness is going to chase the man of my dreams into the corner again and I'm going to have to face that.
    "Noah," I pause as I search for the words. I'm not one to give up easily so I'm going to ask one more time. I need to give him a chance to prove that he wants more than what exists here. I can't be the only contact he has with the outside world. I can't just continue to be the light in all of his darkness. It's going to suffocate me. I'm going to miss my chance to enjoy all that my life could be offering me because I'm terrified that my joy will send him reeling. "The afterschool program is having a series of workshops and I was wondering something."
    His tall body tenses immediately. I watch his shoulders pull back from me with a seamless grace that no one else would notice. It's effortless and subtle but it's telling. It means he's steeling himself for the question I'm