Read Online Uncle John’s Giant 10th Anniversary Bathroom Reader by Bathroom Readers’ Institute - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Bathroom Readers’ Institute
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as a good T-bone, but tasted like a beef sponge.
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More than 70% of all U.S. currency in circulation is held in foreign countries.
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• Freeze-dried scrambled eggs. “Can be prepared by simply cooking with water,” Consumer Reports wrote in 1962. But that was the only good news. Their tasting panel “came up with a luke warm ‘neither like nor dislike’…and at current egg prices, two dozen fresh eggs cost the same as two freeze-dried servings.”
Other Freeze-Dried Flops
• Freeze-dried mushrooms in a box, from Armour foods
• Freeze-dried cottage cheese (“with cultured sour cream dressing”), from Holland Dairies
• Freeze-dried milkshake mix, from Borden
PET PROJECTS
• The process of freeze-drying is now widely used in taxidermy (stuffing and mounting dead animals). In the late 1950s, scientists at the Smithsonian Institution discovered that by freeze-drying animals instead of skinning and stuffing them, they could produce more lifelike specimens while reducing labor costs by as much as 80%. Today more than a third of all museums in the United States have freeze-dryers, and some companies will even freeze-dry pets.
• The process is the same as with freeze-drying food, with one exception: the animals are bent into lifelike poses, such as “dining on prey,” “fetching a stick,” or “resting by fire,” before they are frozen.
• Since the internal organs remain in place, animals retain virtually the same shape and dimensions when they’re freeze-dried. The only difference is their weight—a freeze-dried animal has roughly the same consistency as styrofoam.
• The process is effective, but is impractical with large animals. Animals weighing as little as 65 pounds can take as long as a year to lose all of their moisture, so most large animals are still skinned and stuffed the old-fashioned way.
NEWS FLASH
“Mrs. Oramae Lewis of Bedford, Ohio, had her cat Felix freeze-dried by a local veterinarian after it was run down by an 18-wheel tractor trailer. The veterinarian used a freeze-drying machine once used by a coffee company. ‘Now I can have Felix just like I did when he was alive,’ she said. ‘He’s just like he was in real life, only flatter.’”
—The Washington Post, June 27, 1983
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The world’s most popular car color is red.
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MARK TWAIN SAYS…
No one else in the history of American literature has combined sardonic wit, warmth, and intelligence as successfully as Mark Twain.
“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence and then success is sure.”
“What a talker he is—he could persuade a fish to come out and take a walk with him.”
“The lack of money is the root of all evil.”
“Why shouldn’t truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to stick to possibilities.”
“Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.”
“But who prays for Satan? Who in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner who needed it most?”
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can afford to and when he can’t.” “Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered—either by themselves, or by others.”
“We do not deal much in facts when we are contemplating ourselves.”
“Envy….the only thing which men will sell both body and soul to get.”
“If we had less statesmanship, we would get along with fewer battleships.”
“If I cannot swear in heaven I shall not go there.”
“It takes me a long time to lose my temper but once lost, I could not find it with a dog.”
“Virtue has never been as respectable as money.”
“I wonder how much it would take to buy a soap-bubble if there was only one in the world.”
----
Every year, more than 500,000 passengers are bumped from U.S. airlines due to overbooking.
----
THE BEST THINGS EVER SAID?
From The 637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said, edited by Robert Byrne.
“If
----
More than 70% of all U.S. currency in circulation is held in foreign countries.
----
• Freeze-dried scrambled eggs. “Can be prepared by simply cooking with water,” Consumer Reports wrote in 1962. But that was the only good news. Their tasting panel “came up with a luke warm ‘neither like nor dislike’…and at current egg prices, two dozen fresh eggs cost the same as two freeze-dried servings.”
Other Freeze-Dried Flops
• Freeze-dried mushrooms in a box, from Armour foods
• Freeze-dried cottage cheese (“with cultured sour cream dressing”), from Holland Dairies
• Freeze-dried milkshake mix, from Borden
PET PROJECTS
• The process of freeze-drying is now widely used in taxidermy (stuffing and mounting dead animals). In the late 1950s, scientists at the Smithsonian Institution discovered that by freeze-drying animals instead of skinning and stuffing them, they could produce more lifelike specimens while reducing labor costs by as much as 80%. Today more than a third of all museums in the United States have freeze-dryers, and some companies will even freeze-dry pets.
• The process is the same as with freeze-drying food, with one exception: the animals are bent into lifelike poses, such as “dining on prey,” “fetching a stick,” or “resting by fire,” before they are frozen.
• Since the internal organs remain in place, animals retain virtually the same shape and dimensions when they’re freeze-dried. The only difference is their weight—a freeze-dried animal has roughly the same consistency as styrofoam.
• The process is effective, but is impractical with large animals. Animals weighing as little as 65 pounds can take as long as a year to lose all of their moisture, so most large animals are still skinned and stuffed the old-fashioned way.
NEWS FLASH
“Mrs. Oramae Lewis of Bedford, Ohio, had her cat Felix freeze-dried by a local veterinarian after it was run down by an 18-wheel tractor trailer. The veterinarian used a freeze-drying machine once used by a coffee company. ‘Now I can have Felix just like I did when he was alive,’ she said. ‘He’s just like he was in real life, only flatter.’”
—The Washington Post, June 27, 1983
----
The world’s most popular car color is red.
----
MARK TWAIN SAYS…
No one else in the history of American literature has combined sardonic wit, warmth, and intelligence as successfully as Mark Twain.
“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence and then success is sure.”
“What a talker he is—he could persuade a fish to come out and take a walk with him.”
“The lack of money is the root of all evil.”
“Why shouldn’t truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to stick to possibilities.”
“Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.”
“But who prays for Satan? Who in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner who needed it most?”
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can afford to and when he can’t.” “Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered—either by themselves, or by others.”
“We do not deal much in facts when we are contemplating ourselves.”
“Envy….the only thing which men will sell both body and soul to get.”
“If we had less statesmanship, we would get along with fewer battleships.”
“If I cannot swear in heaven I shall not go there.”
“It takes me a long time to lose my temper but once lost, I could not find it with a dog.”
“Virtue has never been as respectable as money.”
“I wonder how much it would take to buy a soap-bubble if there was only one in the world.”
----
Every year, more than 500,000 passengers are bumped from U.S. airlines due to overbooking.
----
THE BEST THINGS EVER SAID?
From The 637 Best Things Anybody Ever Said, edited by Robert Byrne.
“If
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